Could you help me to correct a sentence, please?

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Ant_222  #319884  Thu, 25 Jan 07 05:57 PM
Here it is:

«The first of them (of the four statues) depicted supercilious and ruinous Unbelief, the other — dark and as well harmful Superstition, the third showed their father — hardened and stubborn Ignorance, the fourth — their loathsome child — fierce and insensitive Inhumanity.»

That's how I translated it from Russian.
  
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Lil' Ruby Rose  #319888  Thu, 25 Jan 07 06:02 PM

«The first of them (of the four statues) depicted supercilious and ruinous Unbelief*, the second [or next] — dark and as well harmful Superstition, the third showed their father — hardened and stubborn Ignorance, the fourth — their loathsome child — fierce and insensitive Inhumanity.»

*you might want to check whether Unbelief or Disbelief is the better choice here, depending on the shade of meaning you're after.

Powerful stuff, Ant!  What's it from?

  
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Ant_222  #319898  Thu, 25 Jan 07 06:26 PM
Thanks for help, Rose!

It's from Mikhail Popov's "Chronicle of Violent Miracles (literally, magicks)" written in 1760s... You see, I can't translate the title well...

The only question I have is about the "as well" phrase that you have stricken out. In the original, it meant that Superstition was as harmful as previously mentioned Unbelief. And I tried to keep to the structure of the original text. How can I express that?

And, I guess, it should be Disbelief. I am not sure though (could not get the differnce from thefreedictionary...). Would you please tell me how the two words differ?
  
Ant_222  #319914  Thu, 25 Jan 07 07:16 PM
Shame on me!

It should be Popov's "Ancient Rarities or the Wonderful Adventures of Slavic Princes Containing the Story of Brave Svetlosan, Velduz, the Prince of (no idea how to translate — Ant ); Beautiful Milislava, the Slavic Princess; Vidostan, the Indian Tsar; Ostan, the Prince of Drevlyane (an ancient slavic tribe — Ant); Lipoksai the Scythian; Ross, Boripolk, Levsil and the Terrible Mage Karachun"

A rather long title, in the spirit of the time...
  
Lil' Ruby Rose  #320240  Fri, 26 Jan 07 12:04 PM

How fantastic!  I'm going to search for a translation, as the title has really grabbed me!

In terms of expressing the 'as well', I suppose you might use something like "similarly harmful" or "just as harmful" - but both of these are going to make your sentence a bit clunky, and the latter is a bit too informal for the context IMO.

For me, the difference between Unbelief and Disbelief would be pretty subtle.  While Disbelief implies that you have heard the truth and refuse to believe it, Unbelief (a word that is not typically used, but etymologically plausible) would suggest you have never heard the truth - closer to ignorance than to rejecting the truth.

  
Ant_222  #320384  Fri, 26 Jan 07 06:58 PM
«I'm going to search for a translation...»

I am afraid you won't find one. So, the only thing left for you is to die of envy (smile here).

«I suppose you might use something like "similarly harmful" or "just as harmful"»

What about "as harmful" and "equally harmful"? Won't make sense?

P.S.: Would you let me know if you find a translation nevertheless...
  
Anonymous  #332493  Fri, 23 Feb 07 03:12 PM
«I'm going to search for a translation...»

I am afraid you won't find one. So, the only thing left for you is to die of envy (smile here).

«I suppose you might use something "just as harmful"»

What about "as harmful" and "equally harmful"? Won't make sense?

P.S.: Would you let me know if you find a translation nevertheless...
  
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