Everyday jokes from Deepblue :-)

What a humorous skeleton!


Here is today's:


Doctor: I can do nothing for your complaint. It is hereditary.

Patient: then send the bill to my father, please.

Hello everyone here.

Could somebody tell me what happened to Deepa?
Is she fine during the disarster?

Hi there!



Rules for Success


young doctor: Well, Dad, now that I'm hanging out my shingle, can you give me some rules for success?


Father: Always write your prescriptions illegibly and your bills very plainly.

Block and paste onto a word document and save to your computer.

So many GOOD jokes; what about some absolutely shockingly awful ones? These are just a few I could dig out of a friend of mine.

"Ninety-Ribbons' Bad Jokes"

Turns out my mother used to suffer from blindness spells. I always wondered how my dad got near her.

I always got a stuffed toy for Christmas when I was little. My dad had this fear of chickens, see?

We lived in a wooden hut in the forest until some idiot called God decided it was time for man to discover fire.

It has always been the tiger’s deepest desire to escape from the jungle and go and live in a cage.

What is the most valuable fish in the world? The goldfish.

Why do elephants cut off their tusks and sell the ivory? They don’t.

What one thing does a politician tell you to do that they do themselves? Vote me.

Where do cucumbers grow? In cucumber patches.

What's the difference between a politician and an endangered rainforest? The politician wants to cut the rainforest down to make money...

My mother told me if I started sewing from when I was ten and didn’t stop until I was eighty, I could make a blanket that went all the way round the world. I didn’t try it.

My dad said fish can’t swim. He lies.

Knock knock
Who's there?
A builder who wants to bulldoze your house to make way for a major road.