RE: Everyday jokes from Deepblue :-) page 9

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Hi Candy,

Have you received my second e-mail? Hope to heard from you soon.
Full Member197
Your jokes are great Deepblue. You really saved me from an existencial crisis.
Senior Member4,756
Hi Deepblue,

Your jokes always give me good laugh.... thanks.

BTW, did you get my apology? Sorry about it. I think I have made you laugh....haven't I??
Full Member396
Hi everyone,

to maj: It's my pleasure to make all of you here feel good, I'll keep it goning.

to Candy: Hi, I've gotten it. Hehehe~~~~~~ It really doesn't matter at all. Emotion: wink

"What I Want In A Man"

What I Want In A Man, Original List ... (at age 22)

-----------------------------------

1. Handsome

2. Charming

3. Financially Successful

4. A Caring Listener

5. Witty

6. In Good Shape

7. Dresses with Style

8. Appreciates the Finer Things

9. Full of Thoughtful Surprises

10. An Imaginative, Romantic Lover

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 32)

-----------------------------------

1. Nice Looking - preferably with hair on his head

2. Opens car doors, holds chairs

3. Has enough money for a nice dinner at restaurant

4. Listens more than he talks

5. Laughs at my jokes at appropriate times

6. Can carry in all the groceries with ease

7. Owns at least one tie

8. Appreciates a good home cooked meal

9. Remembers Birthdays and Anniversaries

10. Seeks romance at least once a week

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 42)

----------------------------------

1. Not too ugly - bald head OK

2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car

3. Works steady - splurges on dinner at McDonalds on occasion

4. Nods head at appropriate times when I'm talking

5. Usually remembers the punchlines of jokes

6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture

7. Usually wears shirt that covers stomach

8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids

9. Remembers to put the toilet seat lid down

10. Shaves on most weekends

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 52)

----------------------------------

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed to appropriate length

2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public

3. Doesn't borrow money too often

4. Doesn't nod off to sleep while I'm emoting

5. Doesn't re-tell same joke too many times

6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on Weekends

7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear

8. Appreciates a good TV Dinner

9. Remembers your name on occasion

10. Shaves on some weekends

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 62)

----------------------------------

1. Doesn't scare small children

2. Remembers where bathroom is

3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep

4. Only snores lightly when awake (LOUDLY when asleep)

5. Doesn't forgets why he's laughing

6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself

7. Usually wears some clothes

8. Likes soft foods

9. Remembers where he left his teeth

10. Remembers when...

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 72)

----------------------------------

1. Breathing
Do such Jupiterian creatures exist, Deepblue?
It must be written by a woman, hehehe~~~~~~~~~`

I don't know whether such kind of guy exist. Emotion: smile
Hey, everything you said was so interesting!!! What kind of guy are you deepblue? Deepblue sounds so refreshing!
Hi, maj. Thank you for your kindness. Emotion: smile

"How to earn money"

A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.

The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel.

"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents.

"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37.

"Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."

Deepblue, where is your "joke" book?? Emotion: rolleyes How many jokes do you have in yur book? Can I borrow it? Emotion: smile
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