Good writing?

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Englishuser

#268012 Sat, 16 Sep 06 06:59 PM

Hi,

I'd very much like to know what you think of the way in which the paragraph below is written. Please pay attention to the writer's choice of words and style rather than to the grammaticality of the text. I'm looking forward to your comments.

But, I have got this omelette only after breaking the eggs. My peace of mind is badly shattered. Hardly does it happen that I am not woken up from a deep slumber by this goddamned toy of mine. At times, it seems to ring non-stop. I come back from the washroom and find, to my utter rage, three missed calls and 2 or 3 SMSs. Now I am obliged to call them back all at my expense ( By the way, mobile calls are very expensive in Pakistan) and answer the SMSs. On many Sundays, there are urgent calls from office--means sudden instructions to report to office!Then I ask myself "Where do I stand?" I cannot do with the mobile, I cannot do away with it.

Source: English-test.net, 16 September 2006

Englishuser

Joined on Thu, Mar 30 2006

Regular Member (717)

Paragraphs

Mister Micawber

#268190 Sun, 17 Sep 06 05:15 AM

You failed to include the disclaimer that the writer of the paragraph added:

Just some incoherent thoughts!

This is important in assessing the paragraph you quote.

Mister Micawber

Joined on Wed, Aug 4 2004

Yokohama

Veteran Member (21,223)

'The question is,' said Humpty Dumpty, 'which is to be master-- that's all.'

Paragraphs

Englishuser

#268261 Sun, 17 Sep 06 09:03 AM

Hi Mister Micawber,

You wrote:

You failed to include the disclaimer that the writer of the paragraph added:

Just some incoherent thoughts!

This is important in assessing the paragraph you quote.

Is it? If you just seek to assess the style in which this paragraph is written, and the writers' choice of words overall, I don't see why this item of information is so important. I was mostly interesting to see what people would think of this kind of writing, without them knowing anything else about the context, or the writer, for that matter.

Also, I would like to know how I should refer to other sources when I quote them, in particular, how would you do about this text, where I cite a poster of another ESL website?

Englishuser

ESL websites, Paragraphs