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grammar doubts

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Anonymous  #507585  Wed, 30 Apr 08 11:30 AM

(1) As I thought about the subject, it seems to me that the teachings of Jesus and the sacred texts of the New Testament would be a good starting point for us to engage tonight’s subject of What on Earth is Evangelism? The text in the New Testament, at the end of what we call the Sermon on the Mount, for me, has become a paradigm for which to frame my own understanding of my own views, my own beliefs, but also how to relate and understand people who come to different conclusions in life than I personally have come to.

 

Is the usage "my own understanding of my own views" ok? Please clarify.

  

(2) I spend part of my weeks and months and year in various parts of the world looking at poverty face to face, where some people live with horrific circumstances, not because they've created those circumstances, but, more often, they have inherited them.

 

Can spend replaced with have spent? Please clarify.

 

(3) What has sensitized me in more recent years from this metaphor is to also say to us that everyone faces storms. Sometimes, those storms come out of huge systems.

 

Is the usage " is to also say to us" ok? Please clarify.

 

(4) And so as I live and move and have my being on the face of this planet, I'm helped with this framework, with this paradigm, to say belief is in everyone's spirit. It's not just belief but it then begins to shape us, drive convictions in.

 

Is the sentence construction "not just belief but it then begins to shape us" ok? Please advise.

 

(5) So it's a positive initiative to invite people to respond to the good news and to move from outside to inside, in an initial encounter experience response to God.

 

Can a be inserted? Please check whether the phrase "in an initial encounter experience response to God." makes sense.

 

  
Marius Hancu  #507599  Wed, 30 Apr 08 11:50 AM
1) Seems OK.

2) No, you have the present simple throughout.  

3) No, not good.

4) No, not good.

5) "a" is OK. No, the sentence isn't good.

You need to read more FICTION, you invent turns of phrase which do not exist in idiomatic English.  You don't have the right feeling for the language yet.

 

 

 

 

  
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