Dear Sir [or] Madam:

I am writing to apply for the Master’s Program in International Humanitarian Action at the University of XXX.

I have attained a Master’s Degree in Law from YYY, South Africa, in April 1998 as well as a Bachelor’s Degree in Law from XXX, Zambia, in October 1993.

From the time of my undergraduate studies in International Law, I have had an interest in umanitarian affairs. This has only grown with the unfolding of the effects that [m]alaria, uberculosis, HIV and AIDS have had [or having?] on Sub-Saharan Africa in general and on Zambia in particular. Coming from Zambia that relies on Aid in a number of areas has also been a driving force in my ambition to work in umanitarian ssistance on a full time basis. [1] Although I have held various voluntary roles that have involved working with disadvantaged groups, it was not until my volunteer role with a small youth centre in Santiago de Chile [unless it is a Spanish University, Santiago, Chile] this year that I came to fully appreciate the need for proper professional training in this field. My experience with the children from abusive and dysfuntional homes only made it clear that having a desire to help was but a first step.

I am drawn to the Master’s Programme offered by the University of YYY because of it’s [m]ultidisciplinary and nter-niversity nature which provide for a diversity of v[ie]wpoints and expertise. I am interseted in the bringing together of academic and practical experience that the programme provides.[2] Having spent the last [five] years in the business sector, I feel that the programme will also be a compliment to my experience attained in the areas of roject [m]anagement and ogistics. [3]

In line with my plans to work fulltime in the area of humanitrian id and assistance I see this programme as an indispensable step towards that goal.

I thank you for considering my application and look forward to your favourable [reply]. [4]

Yours sincerly,


1) I am not sure that is the “coming from Zambia” that is the driving force? It is perhaps what you have seen and witnessed in Zambia?

2) I don’t know what “inter-university” means but I trust that you do. Just make sure that they will understand what that word means.

3) Having spent the last [five] years in the business sector, I feel that the programme will also be a compliment to my experience attained in the areas of roject [m]anagement and ogistics.:

original above and modified below

Having spent the last [five] years in the business sector, I feel that the programme will compliment my project management and logistics experience.


4) You have considering earlier in the sentence, so I think you want to avoid consideration.


Overall comments:

Overall I like your letter. I don’t think it is too short. I think it is to-the-point and efficient. They will probably enjoy reading a tight and concise letter.

If you were pressed to expand it, you might want to discuss more about the lessons you learned while at Santiago as well as what your career ambitions are. I know you obviously want to work with humanitarian aid, but where, for what cause, etc. I suspect you have some plans so it might be helpful to expand upon that.

Two other small but important points are to watch your spelling and watch your capitalizations.

That’s it. Overall, your letter is very good. Not much work is required from us.

MountainHiker