Forums · General English Grammar & Vocabulary, Listening & Speaking · General English Grammar Questions
For example, if we say "cat" or "dog" or "building" then we are leaving the details for the reader to fill in. But as poets and fiction writers we are responsible for telling our readers what they should be seeing. If indeed we use generalities such as "building" instead of "Empire State Building" or write "dog" instead of writing "Saint Bernard", then we are forcing the reader to imagine his own novel or follow along semi blind. In order to avoid that basic mistake we have to be specific and and way is to use adjectives.
Below are two examples of how writers should provide details via adjectives:
Her lips met mine.
Her trembling, lips met mine.
Her trembling, young lips met mine
Her trembling, young, full, lips met mine
Her trembling, young, full, red- lip-sticked lips met mine.
Her trembling, young, full, moist, red-lip-sticked lips met mine.
A man entered the room.
A man wearing a trench coat entered the room.
An old man wearing a black trench coat entered the room.
An old, white-bearded man wearing a black, trench coat entered the auditorium.
An old, white-bearded man wearing a black, trench coat ran into the auditorium.
Notice the vast difference between the first description and the last. The first allows the reader to imagine anyone or no one at all since he doesn't have a clue about physical appearances. The others provide specifics and the reader can now see in his mind's eye exactly what you want him to see.
Anonymous:If this is an instructional to help learners, I think the thread is filled with fluff with little substance.
RadrookWhenever we tend to set our writing aside it's best to review it to see whether we can be more descriptive and specific.I am not certain what this part means: "Whenever we tend to set our writing aside ...." but it sounded pretty awkward.
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