Please help my with my motivation letter

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luis_aguilera69  #574839  Thu, 09 Oct 08 03:39 PM


I want to applay for an scholarship call Erasmus Mundus offered by the European comunity, i'm specially interesten in go to Swenden but this is the first time i write one of this letter and let say one of my special skill is not writing. Could someone tell how good or bad is the letter and also give me your opinion of what could be better to include in the letter.. in resume please critic my letter
Thank you very much to all those ones that try to help








Dear Sirs,

  

I recently graduate from the Engineering department of the Universidad Autonoma de Yucatan, awarding the title of Physic Engineer. In the last years I have been working on different projects related with nanoscience in collaborations with my University and the applied physics department of the CIVESTAV-IPN. Due to these investigations I had the opportunity to present some of my results in different international congresses, which give me an opportunity to take a look of how fast is growing the fields of nanoscience and nanotechnology and how wide it can be.

 

During my whole life I have been interested in understanding the way things work and due to my undergraduate studies I have achieved a basic knowledge of many of the mechanisms present in actual technology. Throughout the development of my thesis project I had the opportunity to get involved with the amazing field of “nanoscience” and since that moment my interest in this field has been growing. However I still have a long way to go in my learning process. Therefore to be part of this master in nanoscience and nanotechnology would be an important contribution to my academic formation and also an incredible cultural experience. The knowledge I get from this master would help me not only to continue with my doctoral studies and lead new scientific investigations but also to transmit my experience to the new generations of students.


On a personal side, I am a very dedicated person with a strong sense of responsibility towards my work. I enjoy challenges and get great satisfaction in the process of learning and solving problems. I also love to do sports and interact with people from different cultures.

 

 

Thank you very much in advance for your help.

 

I look forward to hearing from you.

 

Yours faithfully,

 

 

Eng. Luis Antonio Aguilera Medina

  
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ferpectedit  #575641  Sun, 12 Oct 08 08:08 AM
I won't do the whole letter, but I will do an edit of the first paragraph (including the salutation). Here's my edit.

To The Selection Committee:

I recently graduated from the Universidad Autonoma de Yucatan with a ___degree in __ __. The past few years I have been working on different projects related to nanoscience in a collaboration of my university with the applied physics department of the CIVESTAV-IPN. I had the opportunity to present some of my results in different international conferences, giving me the opportunity to see how fast the fields of nanoscience and nanotechnology are growing.


Never assume that everyone on the committee is a man--and always put a colon after a salutation on a business letter. If the degree was a Master's or Ph.D., say so. I don't recognize your field (which might be my shortcoming), so double-check the name for the type of engineering degree you have. You should also explain (even if you just give the full or English name) what CIVESTAV-IPN is. Good luck!
  
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