My essay about robbery, need feedback.

This is a discussion thread · 3 replies
How to Avoid Bandits
One of the most difficult problems of our society is robbery, especially on the street. The rate of robbery on city street is gradually increasing. Consequently, travelers must learn how to avoid being robbed.If one does not want to be robbed, he or she should not carry much money or valuable jewelry when travelling. Even an empty handbag with luxurious appearance may still be the target of bandits, because they do not know how much money there is in it. Moreover, the best way of self-protecting from robbers is avoiding lonely spots. The bandits cannot do anything when there are many people around them. Besides, we should find the safest ways to walk on, avoiding all the streets where robbery often happens. In conclusion, it is very difficult for one to be robbed if he or she travels on the street with a high caution.
New Member33
Hi Darkmaster,

Bandit is an odd term. You certainly aren't expecting a man in a mask on horseback, coming to take your purse? Emotion: smile

These are just my two cents.

If one does not want to be robbed, he or she should not carry much money or valuable jewelry (you don't carry jewelry) when travelling. Even an empty handbag with (need an article?) luxurious appearance may still be the target of bandits, because they do not know how much money there (there doesn't belong here) is in it. Moreover, the best way of self-protecting (clarify- protecting yourself?) from robbers is avoiding lonely spots. The bandits cannot do anything when there are many people around them (not necessarily true?). Besides, we should find the safest ways to walk on (walk on what?), avoiding all the streets where robbery often happens. In conclusion, it is very difficult for one to be robbed if he or she travels on the street with a high caution (wording is awkward.).
Senior Member3,933
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Hi,julielai
I'm sorry if this is a silly question, but what did you want to say about the bold words? Did you mean that they're wrong?
If so, please explain, and It 'll be very kind of you to help me correct it.
Thanks for your feedback.
Kind regards,
KhaiMinh
I added a couple of explanations. Hope they help!
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