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kk

#63861 Tue, 28 Dec 04 05:57 PM
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Hello
Can you give me some critical suggestions.
And tell me how to correct thses sentences.
Thank you very much.
It is a movie theater that booms the local economic growth. For one thing, there is no doubt that a movie theater must recruit new blood including low-rank employees and high-rank executives that would manage the movie theater well .Therefore, the movie theater will create jobs opportunity for resident. For another, it will attract more people coming form other suburbs to my hometown. These customers, including a couple, the older and children, not only see a movie but also buy and eat something in neighborhood. The more people other stores serve, it easier for my hometown to make more prosperous. Who will be willing to forsake an opportunity of leading to boom in your neighborhood?
What is an indispensable entertainment for people is going to see a movie. To give one example, in my hometown, hard work and study take up too much of people’s time. That is to say most students face relentless pressure as much as people from all walks of life. However, they didn’t locate an appropriate place to relieve their pressure. If a new movie theater can be built in my neighborhood, these people can go to there to relax their mind. To cite another example, when lived in hometown, they hardly knew where to go for the weekend. It makes possible for family to enjoy their weekend together. My families often discuss what kind of movie that we would like to see before weekend. Therefore, a new movie theater would bring more opportunities for recreation.
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Joined on
Thu, Sep 23 2004
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vinodram

#64031 Wed, 29 Dec 04 10:35 AM
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Hi kk
i think this will work correctly
It's a movie theater that booms the local economic growth. For one thing, there is no doubt that a it must recruit new blood including low-rank employees and high-rank executives that will manage it well .This will create jobs opportunity for the residents and it will attract more people coming from other suburbs to my hometown. These customers, including a couple, the older and children, not only see a movie but also buy and eat something in neighborhood. The more people came its easy for my hometown to become prosperous. Who will be willing to forsake an opportunity of leading to boom in your neighborhood?
What is the pleasure the people receive by seeing movies? To give one example, in my hometown, hard work and study takes up too much of people’s time. That is to say most students face relentless pressure as much as people from all walks of life. However, they didn’t locate an appropriate place to relieve their pressure. If a new movie theater can be built in my neighborhood, these people can go to there to relax their mind. To cite another example, when lived in hometown, they hardly knew where to go for the weekend. It makes possible for family to enjoy their weekend together. My families often discuss what kind of movie that we would like to see before weekend. Therefore, a new movie theater would bring more opportunities for recreation.
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Joined on
Tue, Jul 13 2004
Chennai, India
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Vidhya dhathathe vinayam |
Vinayath yathi pathrathvam ||
Pathrathvath Janam apnothi |
Janah dharmam thatus sukam||
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