Good afternoon all,

In my business communication course, we have to create four business letters. I wrote two and im in my way to write the other two.

So, I would be grateful if you could help me with my following letters and post some comments on them.

First Letter:

One of your instructors spent many office hours helping you with your studies. Now it’s the end of the semester and you write to the instructor to express your appreciation. Format:  Email.

Subject Line: Thanks for help in marketing Bus 310 subject.

Dear Dr. Bla Bla,

I appreciate your help to me in marketing course that made me get a B+ grade in it.

I enjoyed being taught by you and I want to thank for all your time spent in instructing and helping me. I know I was having some difficulties in understanding the concepts of the first two chapters of the book. But, your way of teaching assisted me to continue learning.

From observing my grades I can tell that I did pretty well in the course. And, I'm glad about my grade. So, many thanks for your time, expertise and patience!

Regards,

My name

Second Letter:

You have just returned from a holiday abroad to _____.   The return flight was VERY UNPLEASANT. Write a complaint letter to the airlines.  Format: Email.

Subject Line: Complaints about flight no. 765 on Nov. 27, 2005 at 1 pm.

Dear Customer Services Manager,

I have just returned from a holiday abroad to Turkey. I was on the flight no. 765 from Ankara to Dubai on November 27, 2005 at 1:00 pm. Since I was on the plane, I've noticed many things weren't organized so well.

First, there was confusion on the seat number. My seat number and someone else's were the same. And I know that you are full aware how embarrassing this is.  Next, when I asked the hostess to bring me a pillow for my back pain, she went and never came back! Then, the served meal was cold and wasn't encouraging to eat.

I know that customer satisfaction is the main aim of your company. Therefore, it would helpful if you take the preceding points in consideration. Otherwise, I'm enjoying the safety of your trips and thinking of a trip to Jordan shortly.

Regards,

My name

----------------------

Notice: Names, numbers, company names and adresses are fake, if available.

Many thanks.

The Fourth and Last Letter:

You’re the manager of a newly renovated luxury health spa and yoga center for women only at a well known five-star hotel in Dubai.  The hotel manager gives you a list of well-known Dubai female VIPs.  Your task is to write a promotions letter to attract these women to use the spa and yoga center. Format: Block letter.

Dubai Spa and Yoga Centre

Creek Road

P.O. Box 4545,

Dubai, U.A.E.

November 24, 2005

Hessa Al Hajery

Al Futtaim Motors, Inc.

P. O. Box 7891,

Dubai, UAE.

Subject Line: Special invitation for the most luxurious spa and yoga centre.

Dear Ms. Hessa,

Are you having trouble getting a good centre to take care of your health after a long day of work? As you are one of the busiest people in Dubai, you should be looking for a place where it fits your prestige. This is why it is important to have a special centre to take care of your health.

At Dubai Spa and Yoga Centre, you can have a glorious time being taken care of by our female specialists. At Dubai Spa and Yoga Centre, we promote relaxation and wellbeing of your mind and body. At Dubai Spa and Yoga Centre, you made the right choice to fill your wants naturally.

At Dubai Spa and Yoga Centre, we offer variety of services such as yoga massage, hot stone massage, pregnancy massage, rain forest body treatment, marine algae rap, facials, yoga classes, and much much more! At Dubai Spa and Yoga Centre, you can have privacy and get comfort.

To help your wonderful dreams become true, just pick up the phone and call on (04-676-1111), or simply send on the e-mail address info@DSYC.com and one of our friendly operators will answer your questions and arrange appointments for you. Or drop by our centre located in Sheraton Dubai Creek Hotel at Creek Road in Dubai.

Sincerely,

My Name, Manager

Hello,

Sorry I can't go through all your letters in detail but here are a few pointers for you:

Be careful about your word choices; a few of your words are not really appropriate. For example, in letter 2

Since I was on the plane (When I was on the plane).

Full aware (fully aware

Do you really 'enjoy' safety?

Can we describe food as 'encouraging to eat'?