[title]Family quotes[/title] [description]Welcome to our family quotes section! Here you'll find some of the funniest (and wisest) quotes on the subject of family life![/description]
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Latest post Sat, Jun 23 2007 4:37 PM by Anonymous. 4 replies.
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ericupsman  +  66485 Sun, 09 Jan 05 08:42 AM
ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.
Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

ARE - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas containing oxygen.
Usage: "He cain't breathe ... give 'im some ARE!"

BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayam.
Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

BARE - (noun) - An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast.
Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.
Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."

CHEER - (adverb) In this place.
Usage: "Just set that bare rat cheer".

DID - (adjective) - Not alive.
Usage: "He's did, Jim."

FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.
Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.
Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed ... must be from some farn country."

FAT - (noun), (verb) - A battle or combat; to engage in battle or combat.
Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."

GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.
Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert."

HAZE - A contraction.
Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah ... haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit'n 'is laf."

HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
Usage: "Heidi, Hire yew?"

IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart. See "Arkansas native."
Usage: "Them Bammer boys sure are ignert!"

JAWJUH - (noun) - The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck and took it to Lanner."

JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) Contraction.
Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"

MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

RANCH - (noun)- Tool used for tight'nin' bolts.
Usage: "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.
Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.
Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

SEED -(verb) - Past tense of "to see".
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City".

TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.
Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process.
Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.
Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

VIEW - Contraction (verb) and pronoun.
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City ... view?"

Joined on Sun, Dec 12 2004
Florida, USA
Full Member 117
Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.
bobthejob, 4 yr 292 days ago
what the heck is with you get some real jokes my man (n)
Pie, 4 yr 292 days ago
Well, I thought they were pretty funny. It's not very nice going 'round and sayin' that stuff.
hi-its-me, 4 yr 291 days ago
Them's there are some mightly funny jokes!
Anonymous, 2 yr 157 days ago

you forgot some of the most important contraction forms such as

ustacud- to have been able to in the past tense

yawntu- do you want to

jeetyet- an inquisition into someones hunger

whatdayalauw- I suppose this means what do you think but it has never really made any sense at all

howboutchee- how are you doing

whadayounsinto- what are you (plural) doing right now

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