Family Functions
Family is the basis for children or even adults to learn how to love each other, respect others and maintain their own traditions or customs. Family is also a place where people find a warmth and comfortable atmosphere in their life. Regardless of whatever happens, people still love their family because they learn to be good people from their family members, especially from their parents. For me, since I was a child, my parents have taught me how to be polite to adults and how to respect other people. I remember when I was in high school; I used to tell my best friend, Linda, about my family. She told me about her family, too. She shares with me everything, especially when she has troubles with her parents. Through her story and my story, I realize that even though our families have some common family functions such as how we take care of each other and our belief , we still have differences in our family economic support, emotional support, and how parents teach us to be good people.
My family and Linda’s family have one similarity that stands out is that we take a good care of each other. When I am sick, my mother always cook rice gruel with lean meat for me. It is a best food for sick people because it is good for their stomachs and easy to eat. My parents does not want me to go to school when I am sick because they are afraid that I will be more sick. When my parents are sick, I try to cook rice gruel for them and help them do house chores as much as I can. In addition, my parents always remind me to go to sleep early every night when they see me using the Internet or working on my homework. In the same manner, Linda’s parents cook rice gruel for everyone in the house whenever he or she is sick. She helps her parents do house chores too when they are sick. Her father takes her to the family doctor when she feels bad and reminds her to drink medicine on time. Therefore, taking good care of each other is common trait of our families.
Another similarity that we have in common is we believe in Buddha. In fact, my family and her family go to temple every weekend together. We are both Buddhists. According to our culture, we have to abstain from meat on the 15th of each month. My family love to eat tofu on those days. In the same way, her family eat the tofu and other foods on the 15th and 30th of the each month. Moreover, my family has our ancestor altar at home, and her family has one too. As Vietnamese people, we believe that dead people can bring us luck and happiness in some way; for example, when we do something important, we pray them for good luck. We also burn incense, which is traditionally used in every religious ceremonies and when we pray for some thing. In fact, we burn incense for both our ancestor and Buddha. My parents always tell me to pray for health and luck before I go to sleep. I feel more confident after praying. Linda tells me that her parents want her to do that too. We love to go to temple together and respect our belief as we are Buddhists.
Despite all those similarities, our family have different situations in how our parents provide economic support for families. Since my family came to America, we have struggled over our family income more than Linda’s family had. My family is a low-income family, and we live in an apartment. My parents do not speak English well enough to get good paying jobs; for instance, my mother is a babysitter and my dad is an assembly worker. They work hard to have enough money to pay for our rent, our bills and other things in the house. On the other hand, Linda’s family is a middle class family. Her father came to America first with her grandparents for nine years, and he had worked a lot of jobs. Therefore, he saved enough money to own a nail shop. Then, he took her mother and her to America, and now they work together in his nail shop. He is also an gardener, so he takes care of all the bills and supports the family. Even though my family had hard time to improve our income before, our life is more sufficient and stable now.
Next, we have difference in emotional support, which is one of the important thing that every family needs to have to create an atmosphere of cheerfulness. In my family, everyone listens and gives advice to each other; for example, whenever I have problems, which I can not find the solution myself, I often ask my parents for advice. They listen to my problem carefully and give me good advice. Moreover, there is no useless argument in my house because my family wants to have a warm, comfortable atmosphere, so everyone will not have pressure over things. On the contrary, Linda’s family has so many grumbles that she sometimes looks very sad. Sometimes she tells me that her grandmother often yells at her and controls her tightly. Specifically, her grandmother yells at her when she did not wash dishes like the way her grandmother wants her to do and even when she talks on the because her grandmother thinks she is talking with a guy. Besides that, her mother did not get along well with her grandmother too, so it creates more stressful atmosphere in her family. She also tells me that she hardly share her problems with her parents because they will not give her good advice; in stead, they often give her their ideas beyond what she expects to hear. Therefore, sometimes Linda says she like my family more than hers.
Finally, the way our parents teach us how to be good people is also different. Truly, my family has always eaten together since I was a child. I like it because it makes me feel cozy when we eat together. My parents have taught me how to be polite to adults, respect other people, and especially to be reliable. For example, no lies in accepted in my house, and when eating, I have to wait for my parents to start eating first, then I can eat because it shows respect to them. Unlike my family, Linda’s family rarely eats together because her parents usually arrives home late from work. Her parents also teach her how to be respectful and polite, but they are stricter than my parents. Every time an adult friend comes to her house, she has to bow to that person. Another difference is that my parents allow me to hang out with friends, but I cannot hang out at night. In contrast, Linda’s parents are so strict that she says she wishes she can move out of her house. Specifically, they do not let her hang out with her friends at all and do not want her to drive her car to school by herself. She cannot make her own decisions because her parents seem to decide everything. However, we understand that even though our parents treat us differently, they only want us to be good people in the future.
In short, although my family and Linda’s family have similarities and differences, we still keep the tradition and culture of our country. However, I like my family more than hers because my parents always care about me, listen to me and give me good advice. I also figure out that family is more important than I thought I was because it gives me good support whenever I have troubles, and it also makes me feel that everyone in the house connects to each other. I am so grateful that my parents has given me a warm, happy family and good support in emotional and good values, which I am proud to bring along with me in the life.