Sentence combining with run on problem

ALEXAAA wrote:

Hi, everyone, since I discovered about the englishforums.com, I had learned a lot. Thank you to everyone that helped me in the past. You guys are the best! I have couple sentence combining questions, I wrote down my correction to the original sentence, but somehow, they all sound so weird to me. Can you give me any suggestions? (Italic sentences are the original ones, my sentences are in bold) This is the instruction-Combine all the shorter sentences into a single longer one. Avoid the word "and". Do not attempt to keep the same order. Be Creative. 1. There's a man. He is mean. He is French. That French man is mean. Very good. 2. The police captured the escaped convict. He was dangerous. They chased him into a park. There were lots of people in the park. The people in the park were frightened. The police chased the dangerous secaped convict into a  crowded park then captured him. The people in the park were frightened. You definitely have to use 'and' between  'park' and 'then' in your sentence. My way of combining these sentences would be: The police captured the dangerous escaped convict after they chased him into park full of frightened people.   3. My sister wrestles. She wrestled in the WWF. She is tough. She won the campion belt. She beat everyone to win it. My sister is a though wrestler. She beat everyone to win the championship belt in the WWF. Good   4. Here's what happened this morning. It was 6:00. It was on my way to work. The brakes on my car gave out. I slammed into the car in front of me. This morning at 6:00 when I was on my way to work, I slammed into the car in front of me because the brakes on my car gave out. Very good

ALEXAAA wrote:

Hi, everyone, since I discovered about the englishforums.com, I had learned a lot. Thank you to everyone that helped me in the past. You guys are the best! I have couple sentence combining questions, I wrote down my correction to the original sentence, but somehow, they all sound so weird to me. Can you give me any suggestions? (Italic sentences are the original ones, my sentences are in bold) This is the instruction-Combine all the shorter sentences into a single longer one. Avoid the word "and". Do not attempt to keep the same order. Be Creative. 1. There's a man. He is mean. He is French. That French man is mean.   2. The police captured the escaped convict. He was dangerous. They chased him into a park. There were lots of people in the park. The people in the park were frightened. The police chased the dangerous secaped convict into a  crowded park then captured him. The people in the park were frightened.     3. My sister wrestles. She wrestled in the WWF. She is tough. She won the campion belt. She beat everyone to win it. My sister is a though wrestler. She beat everyone to win the championship belt in the WWF.     4. Here's what happened this morning. It was 6:00. It was on my way to work. The brakes on my car gave out. I slammed into the car in front of me. This morning at 6:00 when I was on my way to work, I slammed into the car in front of me because the brakes on my car gave out.

Hi Alex,

Here is my take. This type of exercise is a good tool in developing the skills of using clause and participles to connect multiple ideas together. Here is my comments:

This is the instruction-Combine all the shorter sentences into a single longer one. Avoid the word "and". Do not attempt to keep the same order. Be Creative.

1. There's a man. He is mean. He is French.

That French man is mean.

He is a mean Frenchman.

2. The police captured the escaped convict. He was dangerous. They chased him into a park. There were lots of people in the park. The people in the park were frightened.

The police chased the dangerous secaped convict into a  crowded park then captured him. The people in the park were frightened. There are two sentences here!

The police eventually captured the dangerous convict after chasing him into a park during which a lot park visitors were frightened.

3. My sister wrestles. She wrestled in the WWF. She is tough. She won the campion belt. She beat everyone to win it.

My sister is a though wrestler. She beat everyone to win the championship belt in the WWF.  Still two sentences

My sister a tough WWF wrestler who has beaten everyone to win the woman’s championship belt.  

4. Here's what happened this morning. It was 6:00. It was on my way to work. The brakes on my car gave out. I slammed into the car in front of me.

This morning at 6:00 when I was on my way to work, I slammed into the car in front of me because the brakes on my car gave out.

How this accident happened was when I was driving to work around 6:00, the brakes on my car failed causing my car to slam into the car in front of me.