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Would you please correct my sentence?

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Latest post Wed, Jun 4 2008 11:35 PM by optilang. 3 replies.
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Anonymous  +  521642 Sun, 01 Jun 08 01:54 PM

Please help me rewrite this thanks

 

 

We would also like to invite you to visit our website
at www.bluehillcoc.com to listen to various sermons. Thanks
Anonymous
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Clive  +  521655 Sun, 01 Jun 08 02:16 PM

Hi,

Seems OK to me.

Clive
Clive
Joined on Thu, Oct 28 2004
Canada
Veteran Member 29,298
El tango argentino es un pensamiento triste que se puede bailar (The tango argentino is a sad thought which can be danced) Enrique Santos Discépolo
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Goodguy40, 1 yr 156 days ago

thanks will someone else took a look at iTongue Tiedt. thanks

optilang  +  523150 Wed, 04 Jun 08 11:35 PM
 
Anonymous
“Please help me rewrite this thanks 

We would also like to invite you to visit our website
at www.bluehillcoc.com to listen to various sermons. Thanks

”

Can't see anything wrong with it, but an alternative is:

We would also like to invite you to listen to various sermons on our website, www.bluehilloc.com.  
optilang
Joined on Tue, May 13 2008
Poland
Senior Member 2,518
OptiNative British English Speaker Wherever I may roam, I'm still a Londoner.
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