ESL General English Grammar Questions

Re: Can someone please correct my text...formal british english please

Feebs11 — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:14:05 GMT

Bluerose24 wrote:
Very well Sam.

From what I gathered,I now believe that you have been living a double life like Carl said,but I also learned that you have done it in order to get your divorce faster.

You have to take every bloody demand your wife is asking from you,you are trying to make her happy,not to argue with her.

The problem here is that you have opened a door for Carl,everytime you lie to Amy,you are giving Carl ammunition,this is what he wants,to caught you red handed,to make you look bad.

You must be intelligent,I understand if you want to keep Amy away from the nasty details,but she is an adult,not a child,and everytime she discovers that you have been lying to her,she is hurt,she already distrusted you before this happened.

You denying it only make things worst.

I heard 6 hours of tape,bloody boring,but revealing,what I don`t understand is why you let your wife belittle you,why eat so much [*******]. [I presume that you intended to say this? Otherwise the sentence does not make much sense.]

We are in the same boat here,we both want Amy to be happy,you are not a bad man,your problem is that you keep too many secrets,and you go out of your way telling her lies,like that breakfast.

I want Amy so much,I truly believe that we can make very happy each other,if I could only make her fall in love with me...What`s not to like about me...I am single,sucessful,handsome,young,healthy,don`t do drugs or smoke...my family would love her...but love is blind,and today I started to understand the sacrifice that you are making for her.

I will continue to support her,I love being able to make her smile...meantime..you do what you have to do.

Steve

This is an anonymous account, please login if you wish to post replies.

You seem to have forgotten what a full stop is, and your space bar has seized up after the commas. I have bolded all those which require a change.

The red highlights indicate you should look carefully at what you have written - theer are errors.

Re: Can someone please correct my text...formal british english please

Anonymous — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 09:54:41 GMT

This doesn't seem to be a context where formality is required, or even really possible.

Can someone please correct my text...formal british english please

Bluerose24 — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 03:28:48 GMT

Very well Sam.

From what I gathered,I now believe that you have been living a double life like Carl said,but I also learned that you have done it in order to get your divorce faster.

You have to take every bloody demand your wife is asking from you,you are trying to make her happy,not to argue with her.

The problem here is that you have opened a door for Carl,everytime you lie to Amy,you are giving Carl ammunition,this is what he wants,to caught you red handed,to make you look bad.

You must be intelligent,I understand if you want to keep Amy away from the nasty details,but she is an adult,not a child,and everytime she discovers that you have been lying to her,she is hurt,she already distrusted you before this happened.

You denying it only make things worst.

I heard 6 hours of tape,bloody boring,but revealing,what I don`t understand is why you let your wife belittle you,why eat so much .

We are in the same boat here,we both want Amy to be happy,you are not a bad man,your problem is that you keep too many secrets,and you go out of your way telling her lies,like that breakfast.

I want Amy so much,I truly believe that we can make very happy each other,if I could only make her fall in love with me...What`s not to like about me...I am single,sucessful,handsome,young,healthy,don`t do drugs or smoke...my family would love her...but love is blind,and today I started to understand the sacrifice that you are making for her.

I will continue to support her,I love being able to make her smile...meantime..you do what you have to do.

Steve

This is an anonymous account, please login if you wish to post replies.