ESL General English Grammar Questions

Re: Can anyone improve these paragraphs, please?

sebayanpendam — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 22:51:14 GMT

Thanks.

I extracted these paragraphs from a local English newspaper in my state.

Re: Can anyone improve these paragraphs, please?

Clive — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 13:59:56 GMT

Hi,

Why we don't put down 'the increased influx of..'? I thought it was more like THE+OF structure. You could certainly say 'the' to make the reference more specific.

Can we write Having combined increased travel and itinerary awareness via the internet, tourists would expect more..?
Yes, you can. But why not use a more dynamic, active and simpler form of grammar? eg
Now that they are travelling more, and are more aware of their itinerary due to the Internet, tourists expect more than a sleek cultural show before retiring to their five star hotels.

Best wishes, Clive

Re: Can anyone improve these paragraphs, please?

sebayanpendam — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 12:58:48 GMT

Hi again,

Why we don't put down 'the increased influx of..'? I thought it was more like THE+OF structure.

Can we write Having combined increased travel and itinerary awareness via the internet, tourists would expect more..?

Thanks.

Re: Can anyone improve these paragraphs, please?

Clive — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 23:08:23 GMT

Hi,

Can you please check the grammar?

With increased influx of tourists to Sarawak, we not only see the solitary backpacker or senior citizen holidaying here, but also families, younger touring groups, and even students on school trips.

If combine increased travel and itinerary awareness via the internet, tourists would expect more than a sleek cultural show before retiring to their five-star hotels.

The meaning of the underlined part is not clear at all. You need to say in another way.

Clive

Can anyone improve these paragraphs, please?

sebayanpendam — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 22:59:08 GMT

Hi,

Can you please check the grammar?

With increased influx of tourists into Sarawak, we not only see the solitary backpacker or senior citizen holidaying here but also family, younger touring groups, and even students on school trips.

Combine increased travel and itinerary awareness via the internet and tourists would expect more than the sleek cultural show before retiring their five star hotel.

Thank you