http://www.englishforums.com/English/FormalGeneralBusinessLetterWriting-EnglishLanguage/Forum5.htmFormal Letter writing questions, how to write a cover letter, general, business, official, reference, character, leave, sponsorship, invitation, CV, writing to an English company, Learn how to start and end a letter in the English language.enCSMOD (Build: 3260.39585)http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbbpr/Post.htm#88978Mon, 11 Apr 2005 17:15:41 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:88978abbie19481http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbbpr/Post.htm#88978http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-88978.xmlGoodness me, Reviver - Geography, architecture and now industrial design! <br /> <br />Industrial design is: <br /> <br />"the art that deals with the design problems of manufactured objects, including problems of designing such objects with consideration for available materials and means of production, of designing packages, bottles, etc., for manufactured goods, and of graphic design for manufactured objects, packages, etc. (from 'Info please dictionary). <br /> <br />What specific interest and qualifications do you have NOW which makes you feel that industrial design is the right field of study for you? I think you will need to have evidence of some art/ design related studies, eg drawing, painting, etc. It will not be enough here to say what you liked to do as a little girl. (It was appropriate for the geography course, as it showed a life-long interest.) <br /> <br />What do you really want to study? For example, there is absolutely nothing wrong with sending the same letter to every University that offers a course in geography, or architechture, etc. You could simply find 1000 Universities that offer what you want to study, and send your letter to them. <br /> <br />Having said that, maybe you do have an interest and expertise in all these areas, and would be happy to study any of them. <br /> <br />Back to industrial design - I know very little about it, other than the definition above. It seems to me that these are the key points to address: <br /> <br />* design problem solving (cutting the top off the pen is an example) <br /> <br />* use of materials <br /> <br />* design methods <br /> <br />* graphic design <br /> <br />Try and think of how you can prove that you have studied some of the arts, and get back to me as soon as possible, and we'll try the ML again. <img src="/emoticons/emotion-1.gif" alt="Smile [:)]" /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbbmj/Post.htm#88936Mon, 11 Apr 2005 15:36:03 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:88936reviver4dream2http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbbmj/Post.htm#88936http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-88936.xmlHey abbie!!Thousands of thanks to you:):) <br />I wonder if it's necessary to add some future plans in my ML, or do you think my ML is good enough ? <br />And, there's another para, for my application to industrial design, I dont know whether this para okay...just check it out. <br /> <br />My special interest in designing sorts of stuffs from the toys, stationeries, to the fashion goods and even my own bedroom has been aroused since I was a little girl. I used to draw a series of full dress, cut off a pen in order to make it more comfortable to grasp. And, I am sensitive to colours, I could immediately and correctly make judgment on the choice of right color to the occasions, seasons, weathers, even moods. Since I am good at observing and noticing the changes, I can easily accept new things. Luckily, I am always able to represent my own ideas out vividly by using different materials. I enjoy reading travel notes and magazines, and am keen on documentaries about different cultures. From my reading, I have come to the conclusion that the best way to observe and study a certain society or community and its accomplishments is to live and work amongst the people. I seek to acquire knowledge through systematic education and research in my chosen field, which will enable me better to explore the social and physical structure of society, and change my fantasies into reality. <br /> <br />is it silly?http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbrcx/Post.htm#88482Sat, 09 Apr 2005 17:59:29 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:88482abbie19483http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbrcx/Post.htm#88482http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-88482.xmlHi Reviver, <br /> <br />You don't need to make many changes to your original ML, except for the course and details of the university! <br /> <br /> <br />Reviver - My education in China was broad, including studies of mathematics, physics, biology etc. Besides these science subjects, I incorporated other social science subjects like ancient and modern history of the world, political economics, philosophy. This variety of topics enabled me not only to plant an infinitive curiosity in science world but also to gain an awareness of the humanities and its development. The combination of all the courses, which I believe has brought me much more effective tools and techniques wherever in logical analysis or rational conclusion, moreover, has endowed me with an objective and comprehensive attitude. <br /> <br />**"mathematics, physics, biology etc." - best not to use "etc." If you don't want to list everything, put a full stop after 'biology'. <br /> <br />"subjects like ancient" <br /> <br />** 'subjects such as ...' <br /> <br />"...not only to plant an infinitive curiosity..." <br /> <br />** this just doesn't sound right, and I think you mean "infinite" <br /> <br />** "I studied this variety of topics because I am interested in both sciences and the humanities, and wished to achieve a balance in my education. I believe that the combined studies have equipped me with effective analytical skills, an objective approach, and the ability to draw logical and ratioal conclusions." <br /> <br /> <br /> <br />Reviver - My special interest in geography has been aroused since I was a little girl, and I am easily attracted by categories of lines, angles and the shadows made by columns and bricks. The fascination is still there and I own a collection of maps and atlases(pictures?), which supports me in my studies. It’s completely by chance that I caught a look at the website of Erik van Egeraat. I was motivated by the mesmerizing urban and housing design shown in it, which has been a stimulation to me. I enjoy reading travel notes and magazines, and am keen on documentaries about different cultures, especially the municipal styles of architectures, whatever ancient or modern ones. From reading have I found that the best way to observe and savour a certain society or community and the accomplishment it has achieved, is to live there and get mingled with them. However, to get a systematic education and research training in the field is a necessity, it could help me better explore and refine the essence of such a cultural structure and structured culture. <br /> <br />** Since I was a child, I have been fascinated by geography, and I own a collection of maps and atlases which support me in my studies. On viewing the Erik van Egeraat website, I was both motivated and mesmerizied by the urban and housing design shown, which has been a revelation to me. I enjoy reading travel notes and magazines, and am keen on documentaries about different cultures, especially the municipal styles of architectures, both ancient and modern. From my reading, I have come to the conclusion that the best way to observe and study a certain society or community and its accomplishments is to live and work amongst the people. I seek to acquire knowledge through systematic education and research in my chosen field, which will enable me better to explore the social and physical structure of society. <br /> <br /> <br />Reviver - What has motivated me doesn’t limit in the very courses, but ****University and the interesting lively city itself. The tradition of encouraging students to be creative, the excellent quality in research and education, especially the university’s commitment to critical thinking and problem-solving raised my interest. As an independent thinker I would love to take part in this ongoing process of change and the development of techniques. Furthermore, the information I’ve collected from the brochure has undoubtedly conveys that, the colorful student life and the outstanding facilities of **university would beautify my campus life so well. During the application process, the officer’s rapid and sincere responses ensured me of my choice. And, growing up on a typical campus of engineering institution, in which my father works, influences me a lot. <br /> <br /> <br />** I am motivated to apply to .... University not simply because of the courses offered, but by the reputation of the University, and the lively city within which it lies. The tradition of encouraging students to be creative, the excellent quality in research and education, and especially the University’s commitment to critical thinking and problem-solving stimulated my interest. As an independent thinker I should enjoy being part of this ongoing process, and the development of techniques. Your brochure conveys the outstanding facilities of the University, and I am attracted by the deescriptions of campus life. During the application process, the officer’s rapid and sincere responses ensured me of my choice. Further, having grown up on a typical campus of engineering institution, in which my father works, influenced my decision. <br /> <br />"figures of beliefs " ?? what is this??? <br /> <br /> Reviver "I maintain my interest in music whatever in classical ones or rock’n’roll, and I hope that I shall be able to participate in some musical groups at **university. " <br /> <br />**I maintain my interest in music, and have wide taste ranging from classical music to rock'n'roll ....." <br /> <br />** Be careful not to confuse "whatever" with "whether" <br /> <br /> Reviver - "Although I’ve got little chance to play football, for the pitch is always occupied by boys ...." <br /> <br />** I enjoy playing football, though have limited opportunity as the pitch is always occupied by boys .... FULL STOP. NEW SENTENCE - "I am an avid supporter ....... <br /> <br /> Reviver - "in the Netherlands could I have " <br /> <br />** Perhaps I would have more opportunities to watch and even play football in the Netherlands <br /> <br /> <br /> <br />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbrbr/Post.htm#88451Sat, 09 Apr 2005 12:56:45 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:88451reviver4dream4http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/bbrbr/Post.htm#88451http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-88451.xmlThank you Abbie:) <br />Now here's another ML, as a result of applying for the different course...I've made some changes in order to get it fitable... But it's really tough, I couldn't represent it fluently, and it's not that reasonable...seems... <br /> <br />During my education to date, my strength of character and determination to fulfil my goals enabled me to work hard and achieve good grades. Now I find myself ready to reach out for a higher educational goal, and I am applying to you to study for a BA in Architecture. <br /> <br />My education in China was broad, including studies of mathematics, physics, biology etc. Besides these science subjects, I incorporated other social science subjects like ancient and modern history of the world, political economics, philosophy. This variety of topics enabled me not only to plant an infinitive curiosity in science world but also to gain an awareness of the humanities and its development. The combination of all the courses, which I believe has brought me much more effective tools and techniques wherever in logical analysis or rational conclusion, moreover, has endowed me with an objective and comprehensive attitude. <br /> <br />My special interest in geography has been aroused since I was a little girl, and I am easily attracted by categories of lines, angles and the shadows made by columns and bricks. The fascination is still there and I own a collection of maps and atlases(pictures?), which supports me in my studies. It’s completely by chance that I caught a look at the website of Erik van Egeraat. I was motivated by the mesmerizing urban and housing design shown in it, which has been a stimulation to me. I enjoy reading travel notes and magazines, and am keen on documentaries about different cultures, especially the municipal styles of architectures, whatever ancient or modern ones. From reading have I found that the best way to observe and savour a certain society or community and the accomplishment it has achieved, is to live there and get mingled with them. However, to get a systematic education and research training in the field is a necessity, it could help me better explore and refine the essence of such a cultural structure and structured culture. <br /> <br />What has motivated me doesn’t limit in the very courses, but ****University and the interesting lively city itself. The tradition of encouraging students to be creative, the excellent quality in research and education, especially the university’s commitment to critical thinking and problem-solving raised my interest. As an independent thinker I would love to take part in this ongoing process of change and the development of techniques. Furthermore, the information I’ve collected from the brochure has undoubtedly conveys that, the colorful student life and the outstanding facilities of **university would beautify my campus life so well. During the application process, the officer’s rapid and sincere responses ensured me of my choice. And, growing up on a typical campus of engineering institution, in which my father works, influences me a lot. <br /> <br /> <br />I consider myself to be insightful, intuitive and adventurous. I made an unforgettable journey with a group of fellow students to Bantang, Chaohu to visit a thermal spring and water-eroded cave. In addition to viewing this amazing natural phenomenon and the surrounding landscape, we also saw figures of beliefs made hundreds of years ago by the local people. This creativity made a huge impression on me, and I was grateful for the opportunity to make an organised visit to this area, which otherwise I may never have had the chance to see. <br /> <br />The experience of being a conductor of a 60-people chorus and the planner of the whole performance, which had been put on in the municipal theatre of Hefei as a celebration of the New Year 2002, has given me valuable and practical experience in disposing the divarication, coordination, and strategic planning. As the last programme in that celebration, it earned the warmest applause of the 1000 people in the audience. I like to think that my calm and active conducting and guiding contributed to this success. During the rehearsal stages, I undertook some lead singing, which proved encouraging to the members of the chorus. I also play the accordion, and my years of musical study have provided me with a profound comprehension of music. I maintain my interest in music whatever in classical ones or rock’n’roll, and I hope that I shall be able to participate in some musical groups at **university. <br /> <br />Although I’ve got little chance to play football, for the pitch is always occupied by boys, I am an avid supporter of our local football team and am eager for being a participant singing and cheering there in the stadium together with the crazy fans dressed in the same color, waving the team flags. Here in China we rarely have the circumstance for football. Perhaps in the Netherlands could I have more opportunities to watch and even play football. <br /> <br />I believe that studying and engaging in extracurricular activities at your institution would improve my communication skills, and enrich my life experience. <br /> <br />Thank you very much for considering my request. I look forward to your positive response. <br /> <br />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxnj/Post.htm#87797Thu, 07 Apr 2005 13:41:47 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87797abbie19485http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxnj/Post.htm#87797http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87797.xmlSorry - missed the accordian. Mention as many relevant interests as you can to show a broad range, but don't go into triva; e.g. "shopping for clothes"!http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxnz/Post.htm#87793Thu, 07 Apr 2005 13:39:03 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87793reviver4dream6http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxnz/Post.htm#87793http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87793.xml?I think the last item I mentioned in the section of EXPERIENCE is about the ACCORDION...??is that enough?? <br />and it is said that it's better to mention the items of INTEREST as many as possible, I am not sure about it, is it? <br />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxmk/Post.htm#87781Thu, 07 Apr 2005 13:26:33 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87781abbie19487http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxmk/Post.htm#87781http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87781.xmlYou haven't mentioned that you play the accordion, and what about your football? get it all in! <img src="/emoticons/emotion-1.gif" alt="Smile [:)]" />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxld/Post.htm#87757Thu, 07 Apr 2005 12:49:11 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87757reviver4dream8http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxld/Post.htm#87757http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87757.xmlhaha......really...really really??!!!hee hee...is there anything unecessary??http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxhj/Post.htm#87695Thu, 07 Apr 2005 09:57:03 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87695abbie19489http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/3/brxhj/Post.htm#87695http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87695.xmlHi reviver, <br /> <br />This is loking very good. I like all your outside interests - you are showing a very broad education. <br /> <br />Good luck <br /> <img src="/emoticons/emotion-1.gif" alt="Smile [:)]" />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brxzr/Post.htm#87652Thu, 07 Apr 2005 06:52:32 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87652reviver4dream10http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brxzr/Post.htm#87652http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87652.xmlAbbie, the format can't be shown here, just help me check up the infos I've listed, sometimes...do you think I should cut off some?? <br /> <br />EDUCATION & QUALIFICATIONS <br />21st Foreign Language Centre (German learning) July 2004 <br />¦ Textbook:Wolfgang Hieber Lernziel Deutsch (1998) Max Hueber Verlag Ismaning/München. <br />No.6 Senior High School of Hefei, Anhui (Member of UNESCO Club) 2001?2004 <br />¦ Graduated with gao zhong diploma <br />¦ Passed CET-4 (College English Test – Grade 4, equivalent to a college graduator’s level). <br />Certification No.0414247012130023 , granted by the Ministry of Education , PRC, March 2004. <br />¦ Got second prize in 2003 English Proficiency Competition of Anhui (secondary school student group) , <br />granted by the Foreign Language Education Academy of Hefei , December,2003. <br />No.46 Middle School of Hefei, Anhui 1998?2001 <br />¦ Consecutively selected “ Excellent Student” annually in three years <br />EXPERIENCE <br />Desk helper February?March 2005 <br />Global IELTS Training Centre of Anhui <br />¦ Provided with consultation on courses. <br />Linkman and organizer May 2004 <br />Hefei Branch of Chinese Gerfans.com <br />¦ Participated in “ Signature Tour around China – Good luck to Germany 2004 Euro Cup” . <br />(covered by Deutsche Welle –sports & Titan Weekly of China , 2004 June) <br />Awarded the International Summer Camp Scholarship August 2003 <br />Playwriter, director & actor May?July 2002 <br />Hall of No.6 Senior High School <br />¦ Created &directed Drama “ Snow White”, acted as “the Queen”. <br />Conductor & planner November - December 2001 <br />60-people Class Chorus of No.6 Senior High School <br />¦ Planned & conducted , Chorus “The song of Changjiang”. <br />(performed as the last programme in the celebration of New Year 2002 in municipal theater ) <br />10?Day military training September 2001 <br />Engaged in “I love you , Motherland” Anhui Province Instrumental music and Vocality Contest July 1999 <br />¦ Awarded the second prize , Accordion , Teen Group <br /> <br />ADDITIONAL INFOMATION <br />Interests: Chinese calligraphy , Collecting maps & coins , Writing , Packing Design , Badminton <br />Languages: Mandarin , fluent in English , basic Germanhttp://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brnlp/Post.htm#87480Wed, 06 Apr 2005 17:00:02 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87480abbie194811http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brnlp/Post.htm#87480http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87480.xmlWell done, Reviver! I'm glad you're happy with it. Why not just post it here? <img src="/emoticons/emotion-1.gif" alt="Smile [:)]" />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brnkq/Post.htm#87464Wed, 06 Apr 2005 16:32:06 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:87464reviver4dream12http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brnkq/Post.htm#87464http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-87464.xmlHi, abbie:) <br />I've finished my CV, I wonder whether I could send it to you...could you drop your email address ?I need your help. Thanx.To tell you the truth, I am satisfied with it:)http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brlcr/Post.htm#86734Mon, 04 Apr 2005 22:47:13 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:86734abbie194813http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brlcr/Post.htm#86734http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-86734.xml1. For you, qualifications would be any exams you apssed at school. I don't know what you do in China. Do you get a high school diploma or certificate, something like that. Things are different from country to countr. Here in the UK, people take an exam for each subject they study at school; one for each subject at 16 years old, and a higher exam for each subject at 18 years old. So you might have to take 10 exams when you are 16, but only 3 or 4 when you are 18, because you study at a higher level. <br /> <br />It is a good idea to put in your honours and music certificates , but they would go separately, as e.g. extra-mural studies (something you did outside school) <br /> <br />2. I don't know what you mean by the status of your school. Was it a very special school? Did you have to pass an exam or something to go there? Certainly in England there are some very famous schools, and people are very proud of going to these schools. Was your school like that. if so, by all means say so, but don't spend too much time on this aspect., <br /> <br />3. I understand what you mean about some of the CVs on MS, but they can be useful to help you sort out your ideas, and get a plan for your own CV. <br /> <br />4. Experience - yes, competitions count. Don't forget your choir and the concert - that's special. Anything like that <br /> <br />http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brkpm/Post.htm#86678Mon, 04 Apr 2005 17:21:32 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:86678reviver4dream14http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brkpm/Post.htm#86678http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-86678.xmlThanks,Abbie!!:) <br /> Something about CV: <br />1. tO be frank,I don't know how to define the word "qualifications" exactly, compare to Chinese. And something like the prize got in an instrument-playing competetion, and some other honors gained outside schools, do they belong to "qualifications"? <br />2. Do you think it's better to highlight the status of the school i studied in? <br />3. MS has the template, but it's too common to satisfy me, anyway I just wanna pick up some of the elements...:) <br />4.and the EXPERIENCE!!! I wonder whether a competetion that i've ever taken part in is an experience or not ...I just wanna make sure of it. (silly...hehe) <br /> thanks...http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brkwx/Post.htm#86561Mon, 04 Apr 2005 10:15:53 GMT946f00bb-57d3-4b7b-a9a2-059b5341af52:86561abbie194815http://www.englishforums.com/English/LimitedMotivationLetter/2/brkwx/Post.htm#86561http://www.englishforums.com/English/comments5-86561.xmlHi Reviver, <br /> <br />Your CV is about your education to date. No-one expects you to have vast work experience, and you are applying for higher education, so obviously you don't have it yet! <br /> <br />You don't need to say much about your primary school, except perhaps its name and how long you went there: <br /> <br />e.g. My Town primary School - 1990-93 - same for middle school. <br /> <br />When you get to the secondary school, put the dates you attended, followed by the qualifications you gained / subjects studied and your grades. <br /> <br />It is very important to mention all the school clubs extra-curricular activities in which you participated, including the choir, football, playing accordion etc. This comes under the heading of "Interests and Activities" <br /> <br />I don't know what computer programme you have, but most systems have a C.V or "resume" template, whci you may find helpful in laying out your document. <br /> <br />Then you need a personal statement, which is the bit in your letter "I consider myself to be ...", and then your Aims and objectives. <br /> <br />So: <br /> <br />Name, address, date of birth, nationality. <br /> <br />education to date <br /> <br />qualifications <br /> <br />Outside interests (internet club, football etc. Get as much down here as you can) <br /> <br />**personal statement / aims and objectives. <br /> <br />Sometimes people put this first, before the education. Look at the cv programme on your computer. I know MS Works has an entry level resume, which is what you need. <br /> <br />