Re: UC application essay help

Mister Micawber — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 12:46:32 GMT

I have underlined some areas that need work:

I come from a country where culture thrives and religion is at the heart of each person. A place where bright colors mask the unsightly places within, where genuine smiles can be seen on each person despite the hardships one faces. Its citizens never fading in character, traditional in spirit, and yet always resolute and vigilant to secure its peace, freedom, and democracy. This is my country, the Philippines.

At an early age, I was already exposed to the harsh realities of living in this country. Everywhere you look, you would see homeless people, children using rugby just to ease the pain of hunger, beggars asking for food or money, and people living in city slums. After realizing all of these, I have not been ignorant and indifferent to my surroundings. Instead, Iâve made a pact to myself that I would do whatever I can to help my fellow unfortunate Filipinos. It may be hard to know what a seventeen year old girl could do to actually help people in need but Iâve done my best in every way I could. I joined various organizations which promote poverty awareness and weâve done concrete ways to help the poor.

My dream is not a dream that I would want for my own. It is a dream for each individual in need in this world. I want to see a smile on each child, on each person that I would help. Iâve already been involved in numerous organizations which promote this cause but I also want to join more, to even create my own organization to help others. I want to empower the youth someday, to make them realize that we would not progress unless we solve the underlying problem of poverty in every nation.

Unfortunately, our country cannot truly help the ones in need. As far as I love the country I hail from, I do not believe that I would be able to do as much if I stayed here. This is why I want to live in a globalized world, to live in a world as if there were no borders. My dream is to help everyone I could regardless of race, identity, and social category. Now, Iâve been given the chance to actualize my dream, to be able to study in the US. I want to pursue my undergraduate studies in a different country because I know that an education from an institution of great integrity such as U.C. would help me attain my dreams.
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UC application essay help

Anonymous — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 14:24:35 GMT

The university asks to describe the world i came from. here's what I've got so far. Comments and suggestions are greatly appreciated.

I come from a country where culture thrives and religion is at the heart of each person. A place where bright colors mask the unsightly places within, where genuine smiles can be seen on each person despite the hardships one faces. Its citizens never fading in character, traditional in spirit, and yet always resolute and vigilant to secure its peace, freedom, and democracy. This is my country, the Philippines.

At an early age, I was already exposed to the harsh realities of living in this country. Everywhere you look, you would see homeless people, children using rugby just to ease the pain of hunger, beggars asking for food or money, and people living in city slums. After realizing all of these, I have not been ignorant and indifferent to my surroundings. Instead, Iâve made a pact to myself that I would do whatever I can to help my fellow unfortunate Filipinos. It may be hard to know what a seventeen year old girl could do to actually help people in need but Iâve done my best in every way I could. I joined various organizations which promote poverty awareness and weâve done concrete ways to help the poor.

My dream is not a dream that I would want for my own. It is a dream for each individual in need in this world. I want to see a smile on each child, on each person that I would help. Iâve already been involved in numerous organizations which promote this cause but I also want to join more, to even create my own organization to help others. I want to empower the youth someday, to make them realize that we would not progress unless we solve the underlying problem of poverty in every nation.

Unfortunately, our country cannot truly help the ones in need. As far as I love the country I hail from, I do not believe that I would be able to do as much if I stayed here. This is why I want to live in a globalized world, to live in a world as if there were no borders. My dream is to help everyone I could regardless of race, identity, and social category. Now, Iâve been given the chance to actualize my dream, to be able to study in the US. I want to pursue my undergraduate studies in a different country because I know that an education from an institution of great integrity such as U.C. would help me attain my dreams.

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Re: UC application essay help

UC application essay help