ESL Essay, Writing World

Re: Young people- please check the essay and specify mistakes. Thank you!

julielai — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 12:27:24 GMT

No, because you don't warn the future. You warn people.

Hint: scientists who warns

Re: Young people- please check the essay and specify mistakes. Thank you!

Anonymous — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 12:07:55 GMT

Dear Julielai

I very much appreciate your help with my essay.
I find out my essay has no conclusion, thus, might unable to call this as an essay.

Let me ask more if I am allowed,
the section you highlighted with red "scientists who warns of the future of the earth ",
can be replaced with "scientists who warns of the future of the earth on environmental issues"?

Re: Young people- please check the essay and specify mistakes. Thank you!

julielai — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 18:45:48 GMT

Anonymous

When I was a child, I had a chance to hear about a environmental problems, ~~thought this is very important and big problem with~~ wondering why adults did nothing even when they knew what the consequence _____ (verb) going to be.

Today, most companies seems trying to create eco-friendly images on their TV commercials, as people seemingly worry about eh environment. Time has changed.

When I was a child, people wanted to have more luxuries, so they worked hard. GNP growth had risen ~~up and anyone got rewarded if work hard while forgotten or tried to ignore what this lead to.~~ In this era ~~of money~~, people just focused on the cash in front of them.

Now that people start listen to scientists who warns of the future of the earth, people are now facing ~~now forced to~~ the fact that polar bear drowned to death because of global warming. Young people are much more aware of and concerned about environment because they will live on the earth even after the older generation is gone.

Last month, I saw some interesting TV program about ~~new~~ Japanese who consume very little~~, they save up money from little salary, spend little, do not interested in any brands and travelling overseas, but~~ but spend a lot of time studying the environment and other social problems. They grow up under the difficult economy, some of father of them or friend of them laid off, head the news of difficulty to get stable job and economic recession, hard working is not a gold any more when your competitors in overseas able to work ten times more at your work wage. Not few of them think previous generation who still enjoying to wear famous brand are not cool anymore. Big dream could be achieved for the previous generation, but not for the young generation. In this winner-looser generation, everyone should face the poverty if you failed, so, young generation care a lot more about the social problems than previous generation. I think these trends are reasonable if you just imagine the back ground how they grown up and what they felt about it (relevance?).

Young people- please check the essay and specify mistakes. Thank you!

Anonymous — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 05:43:58 GMT

When I was a child, I had a chance to hear about a environmental problems, thought this is very important and big problem with wondering why adults did nothing even they knew what the consequence going to be.

Today, most companies seems trying to create eco-friendly images on their TV commercials, people seemingly worry about eh environment, time has changed.

When I was a child, people wanted to have more luxuries, worked hard as an economic animal, GNP growth had risen up and anyone got rewarded if work hard while forgotten or tried to ignore what this lead to. In the era of money, people just focused on the cash in front of you.

People started listen to scientists who warns of the future of the earth, people now forced to face the fact that polar bear drowned to death because of global warming. Young people are much more aware of and concerned about environment because they will live on the earth even after older dead who might lucky enough to escape from the water flooded earth.

Last month, I saw some interesting TV program about new Japanese, they save up money from little salary, spend little, do not interested in any brands and travelling overseas, but interested in environment and other social problems. They grow under the difficult economy, some of father of them or friend of them laid off, head the news of difficulty to get stable job and economic recession, hard working is not a gold any more when your competitors in overseas able to work ten times more at your work wage. Not few of them think previous generation who still enjoying to wear famous brand are not cool anymore. Big dream could be achieved for the previous generation, but not for the young generation. In this winner-looser generation, everyone should face the poverty if you failed, so, young generation care a lot more about the social problems than previous generation. I think these trends are reasonable if you just imagine the back ground how they grown up and what they felt about it.