ESL Essay, Writing World

I try to edit it, but I'm not sure if it is OK or not.

Anonymous — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 07:08:32 GMT

I try to improve my writing subject. I have to hand it in to my teacher every week. Please help check my writing my introduction. Thank you.

Hi I'm nicky but my real name is Atirach Limphaiboon.This year, I'm 19 year olds and I'm single I was born in Hongkong but I moved to thailand when I was 2 years old. I have 1 younger brother and 1 older sister.

I live in bankkok with my parents. Now I'm study about business and english language at chandra university this year is my second years. I want to be an aviator because this job is can make a lot of money and i want to travel around the world.

my principle is " To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. " that is my principle

My hobby is martails art , sing a song ,play some musical instument,
and sleep (I'm a sleepy head)
so that's me and my biography.

<EDIT NOTE: please do not create multiple threads to ask the same question. A mod has merged your posts in a single thread.>

Re: I have to hand my writing in to my teacher every week. Please help me.

Clive — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 03:47:57 GMT

Hi Nicky,

Welcome to the Forum.

The first big thing I notice when I look at your writing is that you need to add a lot of capital letters.

Here's the deal . If you add them and then repost, I'll check the rest of your writing. OK?

Clive

I have to hand my writing in to my teacher every week. Please help me.

Anonymous — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 01:31:58 GMT

I try to improve my writing subject. I have to hand it in to my teacher every week. Please help check my writing my introduction. Thank you.
Hi i'm nicky but my real name is Atirach Limphaiboon.This year, i'm 19 year olds and i'm single .i was born in Hongkong but i moved to thailand when i was 2 years old. i have 1 younger brother and 1 older sister.

i live in bankkok with my parents. Now i'm study about business and english language at chandra university this year is my second years. i want to be an aviator because this job is can make a lot of money and i want to travel around the world.

my principle is " To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. " that is my principle

My hobby is martails art , sing a song ,play some musical instument,

and sleep (i'm a sleepy head)

so that's me and my biography.

Edit my writing please

Anonymous — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 02:51:36 GMT

Hi i'm nicky but my real name is Atirach Limphaiboon.This year, i'm 19 year olds and i'm single .i was born in Hongkong but i moved to thailand when i was 2 years old. i have 1 younger brother and 1 older sister.

My hobby is martails art , sing a song ,play some musical instument,

and sleep (i'm a sleepy head)

so that's me and my biography.