Search results for 'tag:Clauses tag:Motivation letters' matching tags 'Clauses' and 'Motivation letters'

Re: Could someone also review my motivation letter, please? (its urgent...)

Lil' Ruby Rose — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 18:11:09 GMT

Some suggestions included below - very best of luck with your application.

Dear Sir or Madam, ( Is - most distinguished Ladys and Gentlemen or To Whom it May Concern... - better? No! But if you have a name, use the personâs name)

I am writing to apply as an exchange student for the Sculpture Program at the National Academy of Arts for the winter semester 2007/08. I am an Austrian student attending my fourth semester of fine Arts, majoring in âSculpture â Transmedial Spaceâ studies at the University of Arts and Industrial Design in Linz, Austria.

I know that the experience of studying abroad will help me to develop myself and to improve my knowledge. It has been my ambition to study at the National Academy for the [or of ] Arts in Sophia since I first saw your website four months ago. The university program in Sofia is structured differently from my university's, and that is one reason for my decision and my interest in applying to your academy. For example, we do not have the opportunity to work with materials like stone or bronze, and we do not have such a clear focus on the natural world as the starting point for studies. nor are our studies are based on the study of nature [this clause reads a little strangely - what do you mean here? Life drawing?](I do not know how do describe it in English â I do not mean Life drawing- I mean we do not have nature as example, ideal or model for our works- we are not working in the tradition of naturalism â I do not find the word I am searching for and it is not in my dictionary âis it imaginable to explain what I mean? Is that something like it?). The stone sculptures from my portfolio are up to five years old. They are results of a six day workshop which is run once a year in a Roman sandstone pit in St. Margarethen im Burgenland, Austria. From the very first time I worked with stone I have been fascinated by this material. The possibility of learning more in this area is another important reason for my application. Our courses in Sculpture - Transmedial Space programme focus on experimental work in relation to space and situation-specific work. Through this education I want to develop my awareness and appreciation of the subtle details eye for fine variances [wrong word? Not sure what you mean here] ( another word for minor differences) in my surroundings; to see how tiny variations affect their environment; and from there develop my own projects. which [consider the social life to find a differential few and to learn to develop own projects] - Sorry, I can't work out what you mean here. Is there another way to say it?(minor differences pertaining the social life by means to find a differential view onto situations- to learn to develop own projects of(from) this situation. Is it possible to say it in this way: Through this education I want to develop my eye for fine variances in my surroundings to find a differential view onto situations of the social life, to seek after new ideas to realize own projects.? Is that something more like you mean?) This is also a reason for me to search for an opportunity to study sculpture in a traditional form. I want to experience an alternative approach to sculpture studies to broaden my outlook and explore how traditional and modern forms of sculpture can complement one another.

I was struck (fascinating -I always thought struck has got a negative association â no, can be positive too) by the description of the sculpture program at your university: based on traditional foundations, but open to new ideas. I think this also reflects Bulgaria as a country, in the political decision to become a member of the European Union. I am fascinated by the changes the country has made and I think it is open to new ideas. To me, it feels like there is a great forward movement to develop in new directions, [wrong word?] (should I write objectives?) and it is an exciting prospect to be in Bulgaria at this time of change. that makes [it] [what do you mean - Bulgaria, or being in Bulgaria at this time of change?] (both but for me it is more important to be there at the time of change) attractive. My ideas are very different, as are my projects. I often change my materials to find the right one for each idea. This multi-dimensional approach is also shown by my portfolio which I have put together to provide an insight into my creative process. I would be thrilled if you gave me the opportunity to learn from the skills of your Professors, as well as the chance to get to know and understand a little about the Bulgarian people and culture. for an [interchange] [wrong word] (exchange of ideas?) with Bulgarian people.

(I am impressed by the descriptions of your program, and as I am particularly interested in fine arts, I found the following highly interesting: [it doesn't seem quite right to be quoting their own prospectus back at them - is this sentence necessary?] I am particularly intersted in fine arts, and would like to take the courses in sculpture, composition, drawing, history of art, working in material, aspects of modern sculpture, photography, aesthetics and foreign languages, tp develop my understanding of the theory and history of art, and to enable me to apply it more effectively to my own work. because they will enrich my knowledge and help me apply it at a higher standard. It would be a great pleasure for me to study in Bulgaria, not least because of the course variety. I am eager to learn about such a distant culture different from my own and I will make the most of the time I spend there.

I hope you will consider my application and can regard me as a well motivated candidate to this program.

Re: Could someone also review my motivation letter, please? (its urgent...)

Rova — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 23:44:53 GMT

dear lilÂ´ruby rose,

thank you for your reply and the correction of my letter of motivation! I have tried to write clear but I am not certain if it works. I have got my doubts about it... So I may ask you for another review to make sure whats behind all this. (or forgotten)

It would be very nice if you can overview it oncemore! thanks a lot! I am so glad you have written me!

Dear Sir or Madam, ( Is - most distinguished Ladys and Gentlemen or To Whom it May Concern... - better?)

I am writing to apply as an exchange student for the Sculpture Program at the National Academy of Arts for the winter semester 2007/08. I am an Austrian student attending my fourth semester of fine Arts majoring in âSculpture â Transmedial Spaceâ studies at the University of Arts and industrial Design in Linz, Austria.

I am convinced that the experience of studying abroad will be very helpful for me to further develop myself and to improve my knowledge. It has been my ambition to study at the National Academy for Arts in Sophia since I first saw your website four months ago. The university program in Sofia seems to be structured differently from my university's, and that is one reason for my decision and my interest in applying to your academy. For example, we do not have the opportunity to work with materials like stone or bronze, nor are our studies are based on the study of nature [this clause reads a little strangely - what do you mean here? Life drawing?](I do not know how do describe it in English â I do not mean Life drawing- I mean we do not have nature as example, ideal or model for our works- we are not working in the tradition of naturalism â I do not find the word I am searching for and it is not in my dictionary âis it imaginable to explain what I mean?). The stone sculptures from my portfolio are up to five years old. They are results of a six day workshop which is run once a year in a Roman sandstone pit in St. Margarethen im Burgenland, Austria. From the very first time I worked with stone I have been fascinated by this material. The possibility of learning more in this area is another important reason for my application. Our education in Sculpture - Transmedial Space programme focuses on experimental work in relation to space and situation-specific work. Through this education I want to develop my eye for fine variances [wrong word? Not sure what you mean here] ( another word for minor differences) in my surroundings which [consider the social life to find a differential few and to learn to develop own projects] - Sorry, I can't work out what you mean here. Is there another way to say it?(minor differences pertaining the social life by means to find a differential view onto situations- to learn to develop own projects of(from) this situation. Is it possible to say it in this way: Through this education I want to develop my eye for fine variances in my surroundings to find a differential view onto situations of the social life, to seek after new ideas to realize own projects.? ) This is also a reason for me to search for an opportunity to study sculpture in a traditional form. I want to experience another kind of sculpture studies to broaden my outlook and explore how traditional and modern forms of sculpture can complement one another.

I was struck (fascinating -I always thought struck has got a negative association) by the description of the sculpture program at your university: based on traditional foundations, but open to new ideas. I think this also reflects Bulgaria as a country, in the political decision to become a member of the European Union. I am fascinated by the changes the country has made and I think it is open to new ideas. To me, it seems there is a great forward movement to develop new aims [wrong word?] (should I write objectives?) and that makes [it] [what do you mean - Bulgaria, or being in Bulgaria at this time of change?] (both but for me it is more important to be there at the time of change) attractive. My ideas are very different, as are my projects. I often change my materials to find the right one for each idea. This multi-dimensional approach is also shown by my portfolio which I have put together to provide an insight into my creative process. I would be thrilled if you gave me the opportunity to learn from the skills of your Professors as well as the chance for an [interchange] [wrong word] (exchange of ideas?) with Bulgarian people.

(I am impressed by the descriptions of your program, and as I am particularly interested in fine arts, I found the following highly interesting: [it doesn't seem quite right to be quoting their own prospectus back at them - is this sentence necessary?] I would like to take these courses sculpture, composition, drawing, history of art, working in material, aspects of modern sculpture, photography, aesthetics and foreign languagesâ because they will enrich my knowledge and help me apply it at a higher standard. It would be a great pleasure for me to study in Bulgaria, not least because of the course variety. I am eager to learn about such a distant culture and make the most of the time I will spend there.

I hope you will consider my application and can regard me as a well motivated candidate to this program.

Re: Could someone also review my motivation letter, please? (its urgent...)

Lil' Ruby Rose — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 15:04:27 GMT

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to apply as an exchange student for the Sculpture Program at the National Academy of Arts for the winter semester 2007/08. I am an Austrian student attending my fourth semester of fine Arts [with the specialization on]specializing in / majoring in âSculpture â Transmedial Spaceâ studies at the University of Arts and industrial Design in ***, Austria.

I am convinced that the experience of studying abroad will be very helpful for me to further develop myself and to improve my knowledge. It [is] has been my [favourite wish] ambition to study at the National Academy for Arts in Sophia since I [perused your whole homepage] first saw your website *** years/months ago. The university program in Sofia seems to be [built much differential compared to] structured differently from [our] my university's, and that~~âs~~ is one reason for my decision and my interest [to apply] in applying to your academy. For example, ~~unfortunately~~ we do not have the [possibility] opportunity to work with materials like stone or bronze, nor are our studies are based on the study of nature [this clause reads a little strangely - what do you mean here? Life drawing?]. The stone sculptures from my portfolio are up to five years old. They are the results [from] of a six days workshop which [took place only] is run once a year in a Roman sandstone pit in St. Margarethen im Burgenland, Austria. From the very first time I ~~ever~~ worked with stone I have been fascinated by ~~the work with~~ this material. The possibility [to learn] of learning more in this [domain] area is another important [point] reason for my application. Our education in Sculpture - Transmedial Space programme focuses on experimental work in relation to space and situation-specific work. Through this education I want to [practice] develop my eye for fine variances [wrong word? Not sure what you mean here] in my surroundings which [consider the social life to find a differential few and to learn to develop own projects] - Sorry, I can't work out what you mean here. Is there another way to say it? This is also a reason for me to search for an opportunity to study sculpture in a traditional form. I want to experience another kind of sculpture studies ~~to take the chance~~ to broaden my [mind ]outlook and [to complement one another by means of the traditional and the modern forms of sculpture] explore how traditional and modern forms of sculpture can complement one another.

(remainder to follow...)

Masters, pls criticze my motiv. letter

Gmail — Fri, 09 Dec 2005 13:46:12 GMT

My friends,

Yesterday, I was asked to send my motivation letter not later than next Monday.

My situation is: I passed the entrance exam to MBA program in top 10 in Vietnam - my country & was sent as exchange student to its partner in France (only 3 scholarships are granted among 10 of us) . I chose Master in International Project Leadership.

Pls have a look at my letter & feel free to point out what is not good. Many thanks.

PS: 1.Could you pls explain about the "funny letter". Did I make it ?

2.Which clause mgiht be subsitituted "Dear Sir or Madam" ?

Dear Professors in Admission Board,

I am honored to be chosen as an exchange student, who has a chance to study at your university in the academic year 2006-2007. After getting 2 diplomas from University of Law and Economics University, I sought for improving my knowledge by joining the MBA program at the ... university. And now, with the opportunity from France, I hope to have another Masterâs degree in International Project Leadership.

The main reason I chose this program is that in the market economy of Vietnam, there is a continually increasing need for projects, not only in business sector. I would like to intercept this trend. Currently I am designing a plan of a project which will last for 2 years and will cover the claim activities of all life insurance companies in Vietnam. With the foundation from this national project, I will spread a similar, but larger in scale, project over the Indochina. Since France has dual advantages: being a highly developed country in the Europe as well as being well-known in Asian region, it will be a good chance for me to obtain the occidental information at your university and apply it more effectively to our oriental environment.

Personally, as an extrovert and joyful man, I prefer community-like activities. Like to speak in front of a crowd, I actually have no problem driving the audience to the main points. Prefer quick decision rather than deeply thoughts, sometime good, but under other circumstances possibly bad, I still enjoy the venture and assume the responsibility from my fast responses. Obviously, this leads to a backward in my ability to predict long-term consequences. Even at that difficult time, I know the way to help my teammates to release by the gifted sense of humor. Is it not necessary? If not, you should forget me.

Of course, the knowledge is never a waste. Having been aware that how many fields a project will involve, I have equipped myself with basic knowledge in legal and financial field, all are important issues. Today, I need a guidance to carry out and I wait to receive it from you. It will be the mutual benefit, I can guarantee.

I hope that with the above arguments, you have enough information to reach the conclusion. However, if I fail this time, I will try to convince other universities until I receive the passport to the future.

Yours faithfully,
>>

>>>>

Re: Is there any one could help me to review my motivation letter?

faux_air — Tue, 26 Oct 2004 14:49:51 GMT

Hi, I just modifed it. But now I cannot continus to simplize it while facing what I wrote.
In my eyes, all of the words are useful. I know they are not as useful as I think, but I cannot stopping feeling that. I need your help, dear MountainHiker! In my letter,I'm trying to express my idea completedly and accurately that makes me hard to remove so many adj. , adv. and clauses.

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Dear Sir or Madam,

Greetings from Cheng Ying in China.

I am applying for the Engineering program (Diplome d'Ingenieur)at a member institution of N+I. I believe the N+I program could help me to further strengthen my strong technical skills by acquiring cutting-edge expertise in automation and allowing me to scale higher academic and professional goals in my future career.

I graduated with a Bachelor Degree of Engineering in 2003 from Nanjing University of Science & Technology. My major was automation. Thus I have a strong background in such topics as control theory, distributed systems control, and process control. (1)Moreover, I have experience in single chip machine programming and Series-Parallel Communications.After graduation, I worked for LG Electronics at their monitor factory to represent my company and to coordinate with the foreign Customers as Original Equipment Manufacturer, in order to push new projects and help to maintain the quality. Because of my outstanding performance, I was offered oversea training opportunities in South Korea as a high potential individual. I am proud of both my academic and work related achievements.

However, while facing manufacture process control problems, I came to recognize my knowledge is limited in many areas such as manufacture system control and management, quality control system based on data gathering and process monitoring. So that I plan to further study on advanced automation; thus I could become a professional engineer in China after graduation. Then with several years experience as an automation engineer, I would become an international product engineer or manufacture engineer as I envision. More importantly, nowadays in China, a diploma of engineer earned in France is very valuable since France represents the advanced systemic education of engineers and also because the multinational environment in French institutions can make me understand different cultures better and become internationalized. Besides the program itself, French is the most beautiful language in the world, which attracts me to go to France.

From the Internet, I find that the Diploma of Engineer provided by a N+I member institution can help me greatly in the field I want. To take advantage of your admirable faculty and immense resources will definitely give me the best chance of boosting my study and research. Moreover, the special service and transition semester provided by N+I will help me to melt in French life and study.

I would appreciate your serious consideration over my application. I had pondered seriously before sending this application. I understand that admission into your school is competitive, but I also understand that Iâm qualified, eager and prepared to meet all of the challenges I will be presented with.

I look forward to your early reply!! Thank you!!

Best wishes and have a nice day!

Sincerely yours,
Cheng Ying
faux_air@hotmail.com
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1) They are specialy expressions in my major, I think they should not be deleted.
2) The totally number of the characters are 3000, still over the requirement (no more than 2500)
3) I forgot to ask you if my format is perfect as a motivation letter. What should I do to make it look better.