Search results for 'tag:Essays tag:Writing styles' matching tags 'Essays' and 'Writing styles'

Re: Please revise my essay :)) thanks

julielai — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 03:11:38 GMT

Highlighted a few problems for you...

Isabella209 wrote:

Henri Rene Albert Guy de Maupassant was born __ (prep) August 5th, 1850 and died on July 6th, 1893. During the 19th century he was a very known (rephrase) French writer -- in fact, __ __ one of the modern masters of the art of the short story and has inspired many writers of the same genre from his time to the present. Guy de Maupassant's stories often represent (wording) the Franco-Prussian war and the innocent civilians who are affected by it. Maupassant is a modern (?) example of traditional French emotional realism; he relates his stories as though he had been caught in the act and was mentioning the details as they passed. Guy de Maupassantâs style is described as ~~being~~ simple and direct, occasionally humorous and ironical, his stories range from his interest in the emotional dilemma of all social classes to his obsession for women. (Please discuss this after you mention the war.)

~~Guy de Maupassant stories range from~~ ~~the short stories of only a few pages long to complete novels~~ (awkward -- stories range from short storiess...???). Like most of his work, his stories are told by a third person that seems to know it all. ~~But the result is that no one is there,~~ his writing style fools the reader but there is nothing to remind us of his presence. Further more, Maupassant merely describes the events of his stories and leaves the reader to determine the out come of each story. He lets the reader consider what is going to happened next in order to keep then interested during his stories. (check your spellings)
Throughout the 1880âs, Maupassant wrote about 300 short stories and six full length novels (Since you mention it here, I'm deleting the "stories range from" comment). Heâs style was a mixture of simple sentences, comedy, drama and every day life. In the short story â The Necklaceâ, Maupassant was able to tell a life long story in only a few pages ~~long~~. In such a small story, the narrator was (tense) able to portrait the life of Madame Loisel. ~~Even~~ he explains in close details ~~about~~ the events surrounding the ball, her marriage and also the numerous years of suffer after losing the necklace. Maupassant treats his female characters like children who need to be taught hard lessons regarding life. Guy de Maupassant is also known for his use of symbols to advance the theme of his stories. The main symbol in âThe Necklaceâ is the necklace itself. The necklace is representing the riches and arrogance around the world. Madame Loisel, represents a woman living in a common lifestyle of the nineteenth century, (New sentence, perhaps?) even thou she is beautiful she is still not satisfied with her life and she wants more. Her marriage is a symbolic marriage in the 19th century, when ~~during those times~~ appearances ~~used to~~ mattered the most.

Guy de Maupassant is recognized though the world as one of the masters of the short story. Maupassant also wrote poetry, three travel journals, six novels and a volume of plays. During 1880 to 1890, he produced some three hundred short stories in a single decade. With his unique writing style, he is known by writing what he knew best, the war of 1870, the life of government employees and the fashionable life of Paris. His short stories are still seen as a masterpiece because of their clarity and traditional simplicity.

Please revise my essay :)) thanks

Isabella209 — Wed, 17 Oct 2007 14:52:27 GMT

Guy de Maupassant

Henri Rene Albert Guy de Maupassant was born August 5th 1850 and died on July 6th 1893. During the 19th century he was a very known French writer. One of the modern masters of the art of the short story and has inspired many writers of the same genre from his time to the present. Guy de Maupassant stories often represent the Franco-Prussian war and the innocent civilians who are affected by it. Maupassant is a modern example of traditional French emotional realism; he relates his stories as though he had been caught in the act and was mentioning the details as they passed. Guy de Maupassantâs style is described as being simple and direct, occasionally humorous and ironical, his stories range from his interest in the emotional dilemma of all social classes to his obsession for women.

Guy de Maupassant stories range from the short stories of only a few pages long to complete novels. Like most of his work, his stories are told by a third person that seems to know it all. But the result is that no one is there, his writing style fools the reader but there is nothing to remind us of his presence. Further more, Maupassant merely describes the events of his stories and leaves the reader to determine the out come of each story. He lets the reader consider what is going to happened next in order to keep then interested during his stories.

Throughout the 1880âs, Maupassant wrote about 300 short stories and six full length novels. Heâs style was a mixture of simple sentences, comedy, drama and every day life. In the short story â The Necklaceâ Maupassant was able to tell a life long story in only a few pages long. In such a small story, the narrator was able to portrait the life of Madame Loisel. Even he explains in close details about the events surrounding the ball, her marriage and also the numerous years of suffer after losing the necklace. Maupassant portraits his female characters similar to children who need to be taught hard lessons regarding life. Guy de Maupassant is also known for his use of symbols to advance the theme of his stories. The main symbol in âThe Necklaceâ is the necklace itself. The necklace is representing the riches and arrogance around the world. Madame Loisel, represents a woman living in a common lifestyle of the nineteenth century, even thou she is beautiful she is still not satisfied with her life and she wants more. Her marriage is a symbolic marriage in the 19th century, when during those times appearances used to matter the most.

Guy de Maupassant is recognized though the world as one of the masters of the short story. Maupassant also wrote poetry, three travel journals, six novels and a volume of plays. During 1880 to 1890, he produced some three hundred short stories in a single decade. With his unique writing style, he is known by writing what he knew best, the war of 1870, the life of government employees and the fashionable life of Paris. His short stories are still seen as a masterpiece because of their clarity and traditional simplicity.

I need to add quotes from his book but i dont know where and how to do it. Please let me know what i need to change in order to make it right. Thanks in advance.

Press Release - (Check & rate pls)

joeviee — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 07:24:40 GMT

Hi forum teachers, i'm practising writing a press release for a fictitious hotel and would like you to comment on my essay. And also please comment on my writing style, which area should i pay more attention on and my word choice. Thanks ~

Press Release

For Immediate Release September 21, 2007

A Grandeur Thank-You Gala for Members of Eunice Hotel

This coming 5^th Oct marks the 6th anniversary of Eunice Hotel being actively expanding its customer base in the dynamic hospitality industry in its host city. Being a premier hotel that best known for its friendly services and its vibrant western fused with eastern ambience, Eunice Hotel ensures its employees are constantly being acknowledged of their services and contributions to the hotel. As a token of appreciation for their services to the hotel all year long, Eunice hotel is organizing the ever grandest evening gala for all the members and their families in the hotelâs Queen Ballroom which can accommodate up to 5,000 people.

What makes this gala meaningful is that this event is not just a food savoring and fun filled night; it is also going to be a charity drive event that held in aid of childrenâs charity. A fund-raising counter will be set up that night at the grand entrance to the ballroom. Members of The Orphanage House will be there to greet everyone with a beautifully handmade ribbon as they make their way into the exquisitely decorated ballroom. All the generous proceeds will go to the children charity fund.

To add flavors to the night, we have invited our very own in-house band formed by 4 talented Philippines to perform live on the stage throughout the night. Our programs are carefully arranged to present a brand new experiences to entertain all the attendees ensuring them a memorable night.

On the guest lists we have invited representatives from the Media Rex Corporation, NTS News Publications, Taiko Media, Roiler Magazines, Sensational Holiday Magazine and all local media companies. We also extend our welcoming hand to our partnering hotel agencies, Sunrise Travel Agency and De-tour Agency; Phoenix Transportation Company who have worked closely with our hotel for the past few years.

This event will end in high note with 10 luxury holiday packages given away to lucky numbers they get upon making donation at the entrance. We believe this is a exhilarating night that will be remembered by all who experience it. For more information please contact me via â¦â¦

Formal Writing

Devil_god2101 — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 07:21:45 GMT

Hi all,

I am a student from New Zealand studying Measure for Measure by Shakesphere and we have to write a formal essay going beyond the text.

Here is the question

Context/setting:

This activity may be used as an extension to the study of a text. Students will develop an essay exploring an issue both within and beyond the text. The ideas in the essay can be developed in a variety of ways. The issue could be explored predominantly outside the text using the text as a springboard, or with a greater focus on the issue as seen within the text.

You will produce an essay of at least 500 words which explores an issue.

You will be assessed on:

Â· how well you develop your ideas about the issue within and beyond the text

Â· your ability to use a writing style that is appropriate for an essay

Â· how well you structure your writing with a introduction, body and conclusion

Â· your accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar.

Introduction

Texts sometimes challenge us to think more widely about the impact issues have on us or the world we live in. Students examining a range of texts linked by a âwar storiesâ theme might be challenged to go beyond the texts studied in class and explore what forces define who New Zealanders are today, given that world wars have helped define our national identity in the past.

You will take an issue raised in one or more texts you have studied in class and explore the issue beyond the text in an essay. As you develop your writing about an issue, you will guided through the process by a sample based on a âwar storiesâ theme. Your essay will be at least 500 words long. Your readers are your teacher and other students.

Task 1 Focusing on the issues in the text

a) As a class, list on the board several possible issues raised in one or more texts studied. Express the issues as questions. Which of these issues hold some relevance for you and can be explored in a modern day setting? To help you with this stage, a sample based on the âwar storiesâ theme is included.

Task 2 Taking an issue beyond the text

Choose an issue from task 1 which has relevance for you. Plan three main points you could make about the issue where you discuss the issue beyond the text and make links to the world we live in.

Task 3                       Taking a position - writing an introduction

Task 4                       Developing a structure â taking the issue beyond the text

a)          After your introduction, develop three main points where you write about the issue beyond the text. You can also refer back to the text as you develop your ideas. Each paragraph should have an S/E+C structure:

b)       Other paragraphs follow the same S/E+C structure. Identify the statement then examples and comments in each of these two paragraphs.

c)    Draft paragraphs for the three main points you will make in the body of your essay using the S/E+C structure.

d)   Draft a conclusion which re-emphasises your central opinion of the issue.

e)    Your finished essay will be at least 500 words long. It will:

Â·         develop ideas about your issue both within and beyond the text. The ideas in the essay can be developed in a variety of ways. The issue could be explored predominantly outside the text using the text as a springboard, or with a greater focus on the issue as seen within the text.

Â·         use language appropriate for a readership of students and your teacher

Â·         have an introduction, body and conclusion. Each main point will use an S/E + C structure as shown in Task 4 (a).

Â·         use writing conventions accurately (spelling, punctuation, grammar, syntax, paragraphing).

Exemplar A: Excellence (A+)

What should teenagers learn from the sacrifices of earlier generations?

What matters to some teenagers today? This stereo, those clothes, that car, whereâs the party? What about, âShould I go and fight for my country?â To many teenagers in 1914 going to war was an exciting prospect. It mattered, just like the clothes and the car matter in 2002. Would todayâs young New Zealanders react in the same way if they were suddenly faced the prospect of sacrificing their lives for their country? Not likely. We should learn from the sacrifices of earlier generations. Anzac Day is not a feeble excuse for a public holiday. It is a time for teenagers to acknowledge some important lessons about what really matters.

We lose a sense of who we as a nation if we let popular modern day events obscure Anzac Dayâs significance. Wins in major sports like rugby against other countries are often presented by the media as our defining moments. Many young New Zealanders seem to regard sporting success as all that matters to us as a nation. We need to see past the superficial glamorised way the media presents these victories as great national moments and their sports stars as heroes. Anzac Day is one public occasion in the year when New Zealand recognises its ordinary heroes, those who put their lives on the line for their country. We should also acknowledge those who honour their whakapapa and remember their ancestorsâ deeds in individual ways too. In the documentary The Last of the Anzacs Joe Pere placed soil he collected from Gallipoli where his grandfather fought and died at his motherâs grave to bring his spirit or wairua home. This kind of personal tribute is just as important as public Anzac Day ceremonies in recognising what our ancestors have done for us. It should hold greater significance for us than some media hyped sports result.

The disaster at Gallipoli also should also teach teenagers that knowledge and understanding are more powerful weapons than fighting. At the end of The Last of the Anzacs: 102 year old Anzac veteran Doug Dibley revealed a simple yet powerful insight: âIâve learned something Iâll never forget the rest of my life â how fruitless war is.â We should take notice of a man who had seen the horrors of war nearly 90 years ago. War is no game. The Anzacs had no idea of the brutal horror which lay ahead of them, the nightmare, the great misadventure. As teenagers they had hardly lived a quarter of their lives. Someoneâs child who had finished school and just started work was now charging uphill to certain death into machine gun fire at Chunik Bair. Perhaps if they had received some kind of insight into what war was about then they would have had second thoughts about going. Today we expect instant access to information in a way which was unimaginable in 1914. Imagine a teenager about to go to fight for king and country logging on to www.gallipoli.com, seeing how awful it was and saying no thanks!

There is little difference between teenage attitudes in 1914 and 2002. Young people often seek adventure and excitement. Listening to the stories of Les Leach and Doug Dibley in The Last of the Anzacs I found myself relating to their attitudes. In 1914 many young people saw war as an opportunity to take part in âthe great adventure.â It was revealed that Les Leach lied about his age in order to enlist. He was not alone. Many of those teenagers were scared when they joined up not of the risk to life and limb, but unbelievably that âit would be all over before we got there!â I appreciated how a generation of young men were scarred for life by what they thought would be a âlarkâ. Their values, their perspectives on life were changed for ever. I realised how lucky I am in that it is highly unlikely I will face anything resembling their awful wartime experiences. Some of my generationâs obsessions with superficial material things like cars, clothes and stereos seems trivial when compared to the emotional trauma the Anzacs had to deal with.

The fact that many people of all ages turn out at dawn on April 25 shows that New Zealanders still value Anzac Day and those who fought for their country. It is vital that teenagers appreciate their sacrifices in order to learn what is best for our country in the future. Lest we forget the saying âthose who ignore history are doomed to repeat it.â

Exemplar B: Merit (A/B+)

Is there any truth in fiction?

Is there any truth in fiction? We known Peter Weirâs film the The Truman Show is purely fictional and the people just characters, but there are alarmingly similar parallels between Trumanâs naivety and that of a nation being watched and monitored without knowledge and consent.

The Truman Show challenges us to consider the authenticity of our own lives, and take a look into our world today. It shows us a vision of a TV-made man, the unwitting star of a life manufactured for perpetual broadcast. Truman lives a life with actors as friends, sets for each âsceneâ of his life, and cameras watching his every move. Contemplating The Truman Show I was left wondering, is this concept really that paranoid or that far from reality? How far is it from our reality here in New Zealand?

Surveillance is everywhere in New Zealand. For example, Christchurch is said to have more surveillance than anywhere else in the Southern Hemisphere. But where are the cameras and what is their purpose? Perhaps as a nation we should be considering whether or not this is really necessary. Should we be so accepting of such an invasion of our privacy? A large department store recently installed cameras in a womenâs lingerie department. The reason for this was that many items of clothing were going missing. While the purpose of surveillance is easy to understand, we must challenge it from another perspective. It is wrong to invade oneâs privacy without their prior knowledge. How can we justify this?

Another point to consider is do the cameras that surround us really provide security and protection? In the Truman Show, Christoph is like an over-protective father figure who can also be likened to God. He created a world for his âsonâ and had total control over that world. In a rather warped sense he âprotectedâ Truman. Truman would be kept away from all danger in his world and no harm could come to him. We trust the surveillance in our country to give us protection much like Truman trusted his world to be reality. We allow ourselves to be watched and monitored in the fake belief that this will keep us safe. But at what expense do we allow this to happen? Do we really want such intrusion into our privacy? There have recently been a number of shows on television that peer into peopleâs lives twenty-four hours a day like Big Brother. The difference between these shows and real life, though, is that these people choose to put themselves in these situations. Perhaps such people are just so desperate for fame, fortune, or simply just a little attention. However, we do have a choice.

We need to weigh up the issues of safety versus our individual right to privacy. It is something we should consider very carefully. In contrast to the intrusion of privacy that took place in Trumanâs life, we, in New Zealand must be vigilant in our demand for privacy.

So far I have the main idea "Abuse of Power"

I don't no what my three points can be i think i can write about technology and corruption, but i don't know how to link technology to Measure for Measure. I want to write something like the A+. The topics are different it has to relate to NZ. I am not asking anyone to write it for me but can anyone guide me. I have 3 days to get this sorted before the actual assessment. I have a few more examples if you guys want to look at, if you want to please let me know.

So please help me prepare this formal essay.

Re: could you please check my essay?

chiara — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 07:26:03 GMT

Hello, thank you for correcting my essay and for your nice words.

Just a question: I don't understand very well the following corrections. I've the impression that the first one doesn't sound ver much linked to the sentence before; the second one is probably just a different writing style we have: could it be?

It's the most common dream to travel back in time, unfortunately nobody has ~~made up~~ invented a timemachine ~~to travel back to the past~~ yet~~, but this is still one the most common dream.~~

~~Since~~ As I ~~find~~ think that creativity is one of the nicest and most important aspects of human life, ~~if I could travel to the past~~ I would choose a period remarkable for its important artistic production, if I could travel back in time.

Thank you so much again, and if someone wants to add corrections or any other suggestion, you're welcome!

Bye,

Chiara

Re: Can you please check my essay Plz PLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

nona the brit — Sun, 22 Apr 2007 09:02:04 GMT

I do hope that your teacher didn't give you that question as it gives me serious doubts about their English ability! You can't refer to people as 'it' for a start, and there are lots of other errors.

You have a nice natural and fluent writing style. You just need to be a little more careful with your verb tenses sometimes and plan your sentence ends/starts more carefully. Also, Anil is a proper noun, so always needs a capital letter.

Something is wrong with "WE" BM

Anonymous — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 06:56:28 GMT

Hi there, i was wondering can anyone tell me what to change in my essay

My orginal before my teacher tell my to change this

We live in a society where everyone needs to write in order to make a living; whether it is for school, college, job or even writing for fun. writing allow us to express who we are as a person. Writing also allows us to see if we understand the reading material or not. to be honest, every time I hear the word, "writng" it send a chill down my spine, because i would dread that word for many years. Therefore, my writing style is my weakness in my life.

This is what i got back from my teacher, she highlight the word i must change. can anyone tell me to change to which word. for ex. do i change we to people.

We live in a society where everyone needs to write in order to make a living; whether it is for school, college, job or even writing for fun. writing allow us to express who we are as a person. Writing also allows us to see if we understand the reading material or not. to be honest, every time I hear the word, "writng" it send a chill down my spine, because i would ?dread that word for many years. Therefore, my writing style is my weakness in my life.

Writing for TOEFL

R_a_f_s — Mon, 21 Aug 2006 01:27:48 GMT

Hi,

I will take the TOEFL Test on next SAT 26th of August . I tried to prepare for the test but writing is my biggest problem. I am weak with the Grammar . I tried to imporve my writing style and help myself with the Grammar but I still have the problem simply because I am not sure of myself. Therefore, I wrote an essay on one of the TOEFL writing tasks . I would really appreciate your valuable advices and comments.

Here is the Qs:

Your government is considering a new law that would limit the size of each class to 20 students. Supporters say this would allow teachers to offer more attention to each student and reduce stress and alienation many students feel in bigger classes. Opponents suggest that smaller classes would be more expensive in the long run and lead to a reduction of rescources for students. Which position would you support? Provide reasons and examples in your response.

My Essay:

Education is the essence for building civilized and developed culture. Now a day , most of the developing countries try to improve their educational system in order to strength the political and economical system as well. Therefore, they try to facilitate education by offering a suitable educational environment . Thus, the government decision to consider a new law that would limit the size of each class to 20 students is very promising for having better future. I agree of having such law that would really help the students to have better education with much more comfortable environment . However, there are some people who opposed such law for a number of reasons including reduction of recourses of the students and the expensive costs that are unaffordable .In this essay, I will argue in favor of having such law because of number of reasons.

One of the reason is that the student will be able to concentrate better with smaller classes . As the teacher attention will be focused on a small group which is easy to handle, she\he will be able to provide the students with better knowledge and inspire them to be creative hence, learning will be really fun. In contrast, teachers in the bigger classes are drained of all energies wasting most of the class time in managing their students and trying at the same time to cover up the curriculum within a limited period of time. Also, the student of bigger classes can be easily distracted by other students as the teacher will find it difficult to handle all the students in the class. In fact, I was a student in one those big classes and I suffer a great deal from the poor quality of the education we were provided and the distraction of other careless students. Moreover, learning was really boring for missing the important elements of having successful education which is diversity.

Another reason is that government itself will benefit from this law in the way that the student will pay back every cents as they develop their country. It s true that smaller classes will be expensive to afford however, the government surely understand that education is the way for becoming one of the leading countries in the world. Therefore, ,spending money on the education of younger children is not waste of money as those children will work on their country development and leading it to occupy a prosperous position among the world countries. China and Japan spend billions on improving education. Japan translate all the new published books of science every years having a special budget for translation alone.

Finally, it is obvious that the advantages of having such law overwhelm the disadvantages. We should always look for what is the best for the students because they as the hope of better future.

Re: Strange sentence:)

joeviee — Mon, 08 May 2006 10:34:43 GMT

Thank you very much rvw. In your post, you said that my "sentence" is not actually a sentence. I do agree with you. But i have seen people using this kind of writing style in their essay. And i remember this particular well as in school teacher would encourage student to try different ways of writing a sentence as to prevent the whole essay sounds flat & uninteresting. My point here is, is there any way to reconstruct my sentence without changing its pattern. As in "From (+)ing............., to (+ )ing............., and to ( +)ing, ...............". Combine all three simple sentence(or more) into a compound sentence without changing the meaning.

Any help would appreciated

Thanks.

Re: what you read helped you to write?

julielai — Fri, 16 Sep 2005 23:25:57 GMT

Hi Quarttt,

I started learning how to write with three books:

1. A style manual for reference (preferably one with exercises)

2. an introductory essay reader that includes essay questions and writing exercises

and 3. magazines such as The Economist, New Yorker, and Harper's

This is what I did. Every week, I read a section of the style manual and the essay reader, did the grammar and writing exercises, then worked on an essay. Then I got feedback from an experienced writing teacher, clarified what I didn't understand with him/her, and read a few magazine articles. Reading magazine articles helped reinforce what good writing styles looked like. Of course, if I came across a great essay, I'd try to write one similar in style.

Then I'd start the process all over again, learning and relearning everything until I got it (I know I get it when I know a particular skill so well I can use it without consciously thinking about it).

Hope that helps.