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Re: I am having trouble with the tenses in my essay. Any proof reading help would be appreciated or revisions.

Bushee — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 15:12:40 GMT

You had too many spaces between Leet and ","
My grandmother, Julie Lovins, put everything on the line for her job, including her life. She worked for the Leet Psychiatric Clinic in Lexington, Kentucky, and flew to various locations with Dr. Leet, a psychiatrist, to help patients. Dr. Leet had a contract with the United Mine Workers Psychiatric clinic and needed to check up on patients in many locations. To get to these locations, Dr. Leet flew my grandmother on a small plane. As a traveling social worker, Lovins experienced one devastating plane ride to the Mine Workers Psychiatric Clinic. Little did she know, her brush with death would inspire a disabled mine worker to live his life with a purpose.

You have a few present tenses that would work better with past tenses in the next paragraphs.

Arriving at the clinic, Dr. Leet was rushed to the Emergency Room. As Ms. Lovins started to regain consciousness, she checked up on Dr. Leet. âHe is going to be fine. Itâs amazing he survived with only a broken arm,â said a nurse. Relieved and uninjured, Ms. Lovins remembered what she had come to the clinic to do. âIâm on a mission to help the disabled miners who are suffering,â thought Ms. Lovins. As Ms. Lovins is about to step onto an elevator to the third floor, where the minerâs rooms are located, she noticed a man with a pained expression. Approaching the man, she saw his mangled leg, and smelled the scent of someone about to give up on life. Noticing a photo of his family in his hand, Ms. Lovins asks him about them. The crippled man replies, âThis is my family, but Iâm ashamed that they will not like me anymore because Iâm useless now.â

Not willing to accept this answer, Ms. Lovins told the crippled miner that everyone lives for a purpose. âI put my life on the line today to help save others. Somehow, I survived and have come here to fulfill my purpose for living,â said Ms. Lovins. With a new outlook on life, the crippled miner shot Ms. Lovins a gleaming smile. âYou know what, you are right! My life has a purpose and I still have time to live it,â exclaimed the miner. The miner rushed to his room and called his family. After speaking to his family, the miner once again approaches Ms. Lovins. âI just wantedâ¦wanted you to know that your brush with death todayâ¦. well, has given me the courage to reunite with my family, and to use my experience as a motivation for others.â

I hope I was helpful, Bushee.

Re: I am having trouble with the tenses in my essay. Any proof reading help would be appreciated or revisions.

Bushee — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 14:50:07 GMT

I must admit I couldn't find much at all for errors in your essay, while I did take four years of English in college I don't consider myself a professional. Although this is what I found, you had too many spaces in the first paragraph. and a few present tense's in the fifth paragraph, Hope I helped. Bushee

Life on the Line

           â â¬My grandmother,â â¬Julie Lovins,â â¬put everything on the line for her job,â â¬including her life. â â¬   She worked for the Leet Psychiatric Clinic in Lexington,â â¬Kentucky,â â¬and flew to various locations with Dr.â â¬Leet,â â¬a psychiatrist,â â¬to help patients. â â¬Dr.â â¬Leet had a contract with the United Mine Workers Psychiatric clinic and needed to check up on patients in many locations.  â â¬To get to these locations,â â¬Dr.â â¬Leet flew my grandmother on a small plane. â â¬As a traveling social worker,â â¬Lovins experienced one devastating plane ride to the Mine Workers Psychiatric Clinic. â â¬Little did she know,â â¬her brush with death would inspire a disabled mine worker to live his life with a purpose.

           â â¬The spring night,â â¬inâ â¬1960,â â¬was foggy,â â¬and conditions were getting worse. â â¬All of a sudden,â â¬the plane started to wobble,â â¬and gusts of wind came hurling from the east. â â¬Swaying side to side like a ship,â â¬the plane was off balance. â â¬Stooping lower,â â¬the plane dropped. â â¬Dr.â â¬Leet grasped the gasoline tank switch,â â¬but could not get it to connect to the auxiliary tank. â â¬He pumped the gismo,â â¬and gas started running smoothly again. â â¬The plane was back on track to Middlesboro,â â¬or was thought to be.

           â â¬When everything seemed to be alright,â â¬matters got worse. â â¬Beep beep. â â¬The radio station reported,â ââ¬Middlesboro airport is closed due to fierce cross currents.âââ¬ â ââ¬We are going to have to land somewhere soon before we run out of gas,ââ â¬said Julie Lovins. â â¬With this in mind,â â¬Dr.â â¬Leet spotted a farmerâs field in which he could land. â â¬Ms.â â¬Lovins couldnât stop thinking about getting to her destination,â â¬the Psychiatric Clinic,â â¬where she could help all the patients live better lives.â â¬She was the best known social worker in Kentucky,â â¬known to have an outstanding influence on mentally depressed patients.â â¬ Thud,â â¬screechâ!â¬ â â¬The plane hit telephone wires,â â¬flipped over and then landed in the farmerâs field.  â â¬Thirty minutes later,â â¬a rescue plane came zooming overhead and landed next to the wreckage. â â¬EMS doctors rushed over to the small plane which had imprisoned Ms.â â¬Lovins and Dr.â â¬Leet.

           â â¬Both Ms.â â¬Lovins and Dr.â â¬Leet were unconscious. â â¬One of the EMS doctors vigorously tore open a packet of smelling salt,â â¬and put it under Ms.â â¬Lovinâs nose. â â¬Still in a daze,â â¬Ms.â â¬Lovins began to wake up.â â¬The doctor carried her to his plane and ran back over to Dr.â â¬Leet. â ââ¬I think this one is going to need to go to the critical care unit ASAP,ââ â¬said one of the accompanying rescuers. â â¬Opening a stretcher,â â¬the EMS doctor rushed over to Dr.â â¬Leet.â ââ¬One,â â¬two,â â¬three,â â¬go,ââ â¬said all the rescuers while lifting Dr.â â¬Leet onto the stretcher. â â¬Frantically,â â¬the squad carried Dr.â â¬Leet onto the plane and off to the clinic they went.

           â â¬Arriving at the clinic,â â¬Dr.â â¬Leet was rushed to the Emergency Room. â â¬As Ms.â â¬Lovins started to regain consciousness,â â¬she checked up on Dr.â â¬Leet. â ââ¬He is going to be fine. â â¬Itâs amazing he survived with only a broken arm,ââ â¬said a nurse.â â¬ Relieved and uninjured,â â¬Ms.â â¬Lovinsâ â¬remembered what she had come to the clinic to do. â ââ¬Iâm on a mission to help the disabled miners who are suffering,ââ â¬thought Ms.â â¬Lovins. â â¬As Ms.â â¬Lovins is about to step onto an elevator to the third floor,â â¬where the minerâs rooms are located,â â¬she noticed a man with a pained expression. â â¬Approaching the man,â â¬she sees his mangled leg,â â¬and smells the scent of someone about to give up on life. â â¬Noticing a photo of his family in his hand,â â¬Ms.â â¬Lovins asked him about them. â â¬The crippled man replied,â ââ¬This is my family,â â¬but Iâm ashamed that they will not like me anymore because Iâm useless now.âââ¬ â

           â â¬Not willing to accept this answer,â â¬Ms.â â¬Lovins tells the crippled miner that everyone lives for a purpose. â ââ¬I put my life on the line today to help save others. â â¬Somehow,â â¬I survived and have come here to fulfill my purpose for living,ââ â¬said Ms.â â¬Lovins. â â¬With a new outlook on life,â â¬the crippled miner shot Ms.â â¬Lovins a gleaming smile. â ââ¬You know what,â â¬you are rightâ!â¬ â â¬My life has a purpose and I still have time to live it,ââ â¬exclaimed the miner. â â¬The miner rushes to his room and calls his family. â â¬After speaking to his family,â â¬the miner once again approaches Ms.â â¬Lovins. â ââ¬I just wantedâ¦wanted you to know that your brush with death todayââ¦â¬.â â¬well,â â¬has given me the courage to reunite with my family,â â¬and to use my experience as a motivation for others.ââ

           â â¬Julie Lovins was willing to do her job no matter what disaster might come along with it. â â¬She almost came face to face with death,â â¬but it did not faze her. â â¬Using what she learned from her experience on the plane ride,â â¬she was able to encourage and reunite the family of a mine worker. â â¬Lovins never regretted putting her life on the line for others.

Memos show Clinton turmoil

Jackson6612 — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:05:10 GMT

Memos show Clinton turmoil

Question: I would have written ''Clinton's turmoil''. Why didn't the author use apostrophe?

BY CRAIG GORDON AND TOM BRUNE | <email addresses removed by mod.>
August 13, 2008

Question: Why is semicolon used instead of comma to separate the email addresses above?

WASHINGTON - In a fresh postmortem (=an examination of a plan or event that failed, done to discover why it failed, =autopsy) on Hillary Rodham Clinton's presidential bid (=attempt to obtain or do something), newly published staff memos (=a short official note to another person in the same company or organization) and e-mails reveal a campaign hobbled (=to hobble something or someone means to make it more difficult for them to be successful or to achieve what they want) by internal rivalries (=a situation in which two or more people, teams, or companies are competing for something), faulty planning, bloated (=more than needed, =excessive) spending - and perhaps most important, Clinton's own failure to make the hard decisions.

Clinton offered herself to voters as a hyper-competent (=extra competent) executive ready to be president from day one. But atop (=on top of something) her own campaign, she was a hesitant leader, who allowed bitter infighting (=when members of the same group or organization argue, or compete with each other in an unfriendly way) to fester (=If an argument or bad feeling festers, it continues so that feelings of hate or dissatisfaction increase) among staffers over whether to go negative against Barack Obama, according to the Atlantic magazine.

The most bare-knuckled (=characterized by disorderly action and disregard for rules) lines of attack came from Clinton's chief strategist, Mark Penn, who urged Clinton to highlight Obama's "lack of American roots" due to his upbringing in Indonesia and Hawaii - saying he could only win if he faced Attila the Hun ((?406-453 AD) a king of the Huns (=an ancient people from Asia) who attacked and took control of large parts of the Roman Empire. He is famous for being violent and cruel).

But Clinton didn't embrace Penn's flag-waving (=the expression of strong national feelings, especially when these feelings seem too extreme) approach (=way of doing something), which campaign aides (=someone whose job is to help someone who has an important job, especially a politician) insist was never seriously considered.

Question: Clinton didn't embrace Penn's approach because she did not consider it seriously. Therefore, what campaign aides were saying is redundant.

The article also says that Clinton at times grew frustrated and short-tempered - including on the morning after her stunning third-place finish in Iowa in January, when aides on a call were silent. Clinton's camp dismissed the story as "inside-the-Beltway gossip" and "old news." And former campaign aides sharply disputed the notion of Clinton as an indecisive leader, with one campaign veteran saying, "Nobody seems to want to remember the fact that we had so many successes and come-from-behind victories in this campaign ... and they are due in large part to Senator Clinton's leadership."

Question: What does the line including on the morning...when aides on a call were silent mean? If she finished third place, then why would the author describe it as stunning? What does call mean in when aides on a call were silent?

Question: What does the phrase inside-the-Beltway gossip mean?

Question: What does the line Nobody seems to want to remember...to Senator Clinton's leadership'' mean?

But the e-mails and memos offer vivid (=very clear and detailed) new details about what had long been reported - that Clinton's headquarters was beset (=to make someone experience serious problems or dangers) by caustic (=bitter) internal battles involving Penn and former President Bill Clinton, who wanted to forcefully attack Obama, and others who wanted the New York senator to take a more positive tack (=method, =way of doing something). At one point, it was Bill Clinton - and not Hillary - who approved the famed 3 a.m. phone call ad.

Question: what had long been reported is passive past perfect tense. Am I right?

Question: I think headquarters should take plural verb. What do you say?

Question: Why are the hyphens used in -and not Hillary-? I believe commas would do instead?

Adding to the turmoil was the fact that the campaign had little strategy and no money left to seriously compete in the post-Super Tuesday contests - having (=the form having with a past participle can be used to introduce a clause in which you mention an action which had already happened before another action began) burned through $106 million before Iowa. That allowed Obama to win 12 straight contests and effectively wrap up (=to finish a job, meeting etc) the nomination.

Question: What does burned through mean?

In the end, the campaign's strategy came to reflect some of the internal turmoil, as Clinton veered (=changed course) from attacking Obama to emphasizing her personal side.

Question: What does her personal side mean?

Penn did offer some advice in March 2007 that proved on the mark - Clinton's path to victory lay with women and lower- and working-class voters.

Question: What does proved on the mark mean? I couldn't find it in the dictionary.

But by the time Clinton finally settled on that strategy to win the later primaries, it was too late.

Excerpts from the memos

"All of these articles about his boyhood in Indonesia and his life in Hawaii are geared towards showing his background is diverse, multicultural and putting that in a new light ... It also exposes a very strong weakness for him - his roots to basic American values and culture are at best (=even when considered in the most positive way) limited. I cannot imagine America electing a president during a time of war who is not at his center fundamentally American in his thinking and in his values." Strategist Mark Penn, from a March 19, 2007, memo to Hillary Rodham Clinton advising her to attack Barack Obama for his "lack of American roots."

Question: What does centre mean in the above context?

"The right knows Obama is unelectable except perhaps against Attila the Hun, and a third party would come in then anyway." Penn, from the same memo.

Question: Does right refer to right wing in the above context?

"This has been a very instructive call, talking to myself." Clinton, before angrily hanging up on a staff conference call the day after coming in third in Iowa in January. "She complained of being outmaneuvered (=to gain an advantage over someone by using cleverer or more skilful plans or methods) in Iowa and being painted as the establishment candidate," according to the Atlantic - but was met with near-silence.

Question: I would have written This has been..., talking to me. Why did she use myself?

Question: What is a conference call? Is it some kind of telephone call which address many poeple?

Question: Why is in used in coming in third?

"STOP IT!! I have help my tongue for weeks. After this morning's WP story, no longer. This makes me sick. This circular firing squad that is occurring is unattractive, unprofessional, unconscionable, and unacceptable ... It must stop." Robert Barnett, a Clinton lawyer and Washington insider, from a March 6, 2008, e-mail to campaign staff after a Washington Post story detailed the infighting.

Question: What does I have help my tongue for weeks mean?

Question: What does This circular firing squad mean?

Question: Were the comments in the last paragraph made by Robert Barnett?

Re: hungry 2

New2grammar — Sat, 02 Aug 2008 08:51:52 GMT

Avangi
The expression "impatiently wait for the elevator" usually means you're waiting for it to come to your current location, so you can enter it.

Yes. This is what I meant.

Avangi
Somehow, I think you're using it to mean you're waiting for it to complete it's journey with you already aboard.

I wonder which part of the paragraph conveys this idea. Perhaps, it's because the story is not complete, thus confuses the reader. Part 3 is coming up soon.

how does hitchcock create suspense and shock?

Anonymous — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 15:41:52 GMT

HELLO! CAN YOU PLEASE CHECK MY ESSAY ACCORDING TO SEA PARAGRAPHS (sTATEMENT, eVIDENCE, aNALYSE)?

âHow does Hitchcock create Suspense and shock?â

Alfred Hitchcock is known as the âmaster of suspenseâ and a great innovator. He has three films in the Top Ten of the American Film Instituteâs top thrilling films. âPsychoâ, made in the year 1960, was number one. Hitchcock always uses suspense and tension to shock his audience. He does this by using cinematography very well by the way he uses the camera position, angles, movement and shots. He also uses scary music and lighting when he wants to shock his audience or create suspense.

Hitchcock misleads his audience to create shock in âPsychoâ. At the beginning of the film, we see Marion Crane and Sam Loomis in the bedroom together. By seeing this, we think this is a love and romance story. After Marion steals the money from her boss, we then believe the genre of the film is about crime. However, the genre of this film is not about romance or even crime. In fact, this movie is a thriller and the main character, Marion, dies a third way through the film. This is unexpected because she is the main character of the film and not a bad person. Another shock is when we discover that Norman Bates dresses like his âmotherâ in womenâs clothing, which the audience finds strange and weird.

False suspense makes shocks more shocking because we never know what will happen. Hitchcock creates false suspense in a number of ways. When Marion has been sleeping in the side of the road in her car, a cop comes and wakes her up. The audience feels tense and wonders if she is going to get caught with the $40,000. Marion is very nervous and we are afraid if the cop is going to search her bag. Her uneasy behaviour adds to the tension. The copâs sunglasses also add to the tension because he is staring right at Marionâs face, and Marion feels guilty and anxious.

Another moment of tension is when the cop follows Marion. We think that he realises that Marion is up to something. There is a slight low angle close up of the copâs car in the rear-view mirror of Marionâs car where she nervously watches him following her. The eyelevel medium shot of the car in the rear-view mirror, allows you to see him following, which is a reflection of the copâs car. Hitchcock builds tension by cutting between Marion and the cop.

Hitchcock also creates false suspense when Marion goes to a second-hand car dealer. The cop has an eye on Marion, but she does not know that he is there. We do see the cop so there is a moment of tension. She is doing things that you will not usually expect, such as being panicky and in a rush, which all builds to tension. While the mechanic pulls her car in to inspect it before selling her a different car, she is shocked when she spots the suspicious cop. Although she is aware that the new car she will be buying could be identified, Marion quickly and foolishly decides to buy it. Her nervous behaviour makes the surprised, car dealer wonder why she is forcing him to sell the car to her. She nearly leaves her bag behind, which is a false shock. We expect that Marion is going to be stopped by the cop, but luckily, she does not get caught with the cash.

Another false shock is when, Lila, Marionâs sister, screams when she sees her own reflection in the mirror in âmotherâsâ bedroom. She screams when she sees herself in many reflections in an opposite long mirror, but is relieved that the frightening image is only of herself.

You can only have a limited number of shocking moments to shock people because the few shocks give more impact. If there are too many shocks, then the audience gets used to it.

There are only three shocks in âPsychoâ: when Marion is killed in the shower; Milton Arbogast, the detective is stabbed by âmotherâ; and the discovery of âmotherâ by Lila. Hitchcock creates suspense and shock when Arbogast tries to interview âmotherâ. He quietly enters the front door of the house, takes off his hat, and then stands for a moment in the hallway. He begins to climb up the long steep staircase to the second floor. We feel a bit tense and afraid that something may happen to Arbogast because he is inside a sinister-looking house on top of a hill. Using a tracking shot, the camera follows him from behind to a tracking, high-angled shot in front of him as he climbs up the stairs so he looks vulnerable and small. A cut to the top landing, using an eyelevel close up shot to show a crack of light appear on the floor through the slowly opening door of a bedroom, creates tension as if âmotherâ is behind the door who will see Arbogast and attack him. When he reaches the top step, Hitchcock cuts to a birds-eye-view shot and the high-pitched, screeching music starts to create a shock when Arbogast is attacked at the top of the stairs, in a bird's-eye-view shot, by âmotherâ coming from the bedroom. He is stabbed to death in the face and blood flows out of his face when Arbogast falls backwards down the stairs to the floor. âMotherâ chases after him and gets on top of him; the knife goes up into the air for another strike before the scene fades to black. However, this is not the first shock of the film.

In the shower scene, we experience the first big shock in âPsychoâ. At the start of the shower scene the audience follows Marion into the bathroom. We see her undressing to have a shower. It is very quiet and we can just hear her taking off her gown. The shot is an eyelevel medium close up which makes us feel uncomfortable because we are close behind a naked woman and following her, which seems like we are intruding into this private space. We are looking straight at Marionâs bare back and upper body which makes us feel like Norman, when he was watching her undress through a hole in the wall. Like Norman, we are voyeurs and are intruding into this private space. Hitchcock then cuts to an eyelevel medium close up of Marion in the shower and we watch her cleansing and washing herself, like she is washing away her sins and guilt. We notice that Marion is very relaxed and happy because she is going back to Phoenix to pay back the money she has stolen. Hitchcock cuts to a low angle close up from Marionâs point of view of the water which looks like it is coming down at us, straight and sharp from the shower head which creates a moment of tension because, at the moment we cannot hear anything except for the running water, and this may distract us and Marion if someone is nearby. However, Hitchcock then cuts to an eyelevel medium close up in which we see Marion rinsing herself. This is a realistic shot because the camera is on the bathroom floor on the side of the shower watching Marion and we can see her calm facial expression, so we relax as well as Marion. We think nothing bad is going to happen to her because no one else is in her room and the bathroom and everything seems quiet except for the running water. This is also a private hotel.

Hitchcock then creates suspense by using dramatic irony. He uses an eyelevel medium long shot in which there is a dark shadow on the left, or dominant, side of the screen. Marion is in a completely private place, but in this shot we know that there is someone behind her, while Marion does not. The camera is in front of her, placed inside the wall, and Hitchcock makes us feel uncomfortable and tight as if we are trapped in the shower with Marion. As she is showering, through the translucent shower curtain, we see the door open. With her back to the shower curtain, we can spot a shadowy figure coming from behind. Marion does not hear the killer because of the water falling on her and her hair is soaked by the water so she appears to be small and vulnerable on the right side of the screen with her back to the shower curtain. We see the bathroom door open and we spot a shadowy figure coming from behind. We feel tense because the figure may harm Marion. The shock comes when the dark figure suddenly tears the shower curtain and shrill high-pitched music begins from sharp shrieking, violin strings. The shrill music plays a large part in creating absolute terror as does the silhouette of the figure that is revealed because the face is shadowed and we cannot see it. The killer is on the left or dominant side of the shot and is very dark; light can only be seen on the right side. The killer is holding a knife towards the right bottom corner of the frame where we last saw Marion, so we feel tense and terrified for her.

The shock continues with a close up of Marion screaming. The blurring of the image by the water makes Marion appear less human and everything happens fast. The close up shows her first reaction to the murderer and to intensify this Hitchcock cuts to an extreme close up of Marionâs mouth as she is screaming loudly. Next, Hitchcock uses a low angle medium shot of the killer who is dominating the centre of the screen. Hitchcock uses shadow to make the killer appear dark and horrific. The killer then starts to attack and we hear sound effects of stabbing. In reality, the sound was made by stabbing a melon. Hitchcock then cuts to a high angle medium shot of Marion to make her look weak and vulnerable. She is in one corner of the frame and the knife is in the space. The knife is blurry because it is moving very fast and Marion is in the corner backing away. The tile wall is trapping her behind and she is very exposed. The attack goes on and on and we keep hearing stabbing sounds of the knife. Hitchcock then uses a high angle close up of Marionâs feet so we can see the blood being washed away from Marionâs body, which creates the impression that Marion is dying because she is losing large amounts of blood and looking very weak. The killer leaves and Marion slowly dies. Hitchcock uses an eyelevel close up of Marionâs hand trying to hold on to the tile wall. She is trying to hold on to her life. This is the aftermath of the shock but there is still tension because there is nothing we can do and slow and low-pitched music starts to create a sad atmosphere.

Marion slowly slides down with her back against the wet, slippery shower wall, while looking up and the camera follows her slow fall. We feel guilty because we are unable to help. We then see Marion stretch her hand out to grab the shower curtain but it comes across as if she is stretching her arms towards us, for help. We want to help Marion but it is impossible so we must just watch her fall so we feel powerless. Then Hitchcock cuts to a birdâs-eye-shot where the shower pole divides the screen in half, which seems like we are directly watching what is happening down in the bathroom. Marion holds onto the shower curtain and pulls it down from its hooks one by one onto herself, which is a diegetic sound and now the slow and low music stops. Then we can just hear the water running from the shower, which tells us that the attack is over and Marion falls to the floor, dead. After that, Hitchcock cuts to a high angle extreme close up of the dark plughole, which is sucking up the water and Marionâs blood which suggests that Marion's life has gone down the drain. The shot dissolves to an extreme close up of Marionâs eye where we can see drops of water which seem like she is crying, which creates an atmosphere of sadness. There is great difference between Norman's 'peeping tom' eye and Marion's dead eye because Marionâs eye looks completely innocent, but Norman was using his peeping eye to watch her undress. Then the camera zooms out to her upper body which becomes a tracking shot where the camera turns and tilts as if we are standing up. We feel sorry and very guilty for Marionâs death as we were unable to stop this terrible attack, so when we leave the bathroom we are basically leaving Marion.

In comparison, in âThe Birdsâ, Hitchcock uses several shocks, perhaps maybe ten or more. Some of them are shocks with no suspense such as when the gull pecks Melanieâs head; the attack by the birds at the childrenâs party; and when the sparrows come down the chimney and attack Mitchâs house. There are also shocks with suspense: the school attack; when Annie is dead; the gulls peck the farmerâs eyes; the petrol station scene; the attack on Melanie in the attic and the huge number of still birds at the end of the film. He does this to shock his audience again and again.

Hitchcock also creates dramatic irony and tension in âPsychoâ when we see the shadow of âmotherâ in the shower scene. Hitchcock also creates dramatic irony in âThe Birdsâ in the climbing frame scene. Here, we see Melanie smoking outside the school, sitting on a bench in a medium long shot. She is calm. There is a long shot of the school and an establishing shot of birds in the sky. We can hear children singing, which sounds normal. There is then a cut to a medium long shot left of the climbing frame behind Melanieâs head (in the right corner of the frame) that dominates the shot to show it is empty. We see one bird land, and Hitchcock builds suspense as he cuts between Melanie looking relaxed and a shot of the climbing frame with four to five birds. Then he cuts back to Melanie before cutting to the climbing frame with fifty birds. Then again he cuts to Melanie still smoking and watching the birds. A cut to the climbing frame which is now full of birds creates shock which Hitchcock develops shock when Melanie looks behind her and sees them. Hitchcock cuts to a high angle long shot as she rushes to the school, which makes her seem vulnerable because then there is a cut to a low angle as the birds start to attack. Both of these attacks are extended and constant.

Hitchcock also uses slow suspense such as when Arbogast and Melanie climb up the stairs in âPsychoâ and âThe Birdsâ respectively. He also uses the stillness of the birds as a collective and then shock. There is the shock of sharp objects in a close up, for example, the knife in âPsychoâ and the beaks in âThe Birdsâ.

In âPsychoâ, Hitchcock creates tension by mainly using music which sounds unnatural, and also shock with the exception of the diegetic sounds in the shower scene. In contrast, he only uses diagetic sounds in âThe Birdsâ such as when the birds are squawking and making noise for tension, Hitchcock also uses silence (the absence of sound) to make the audience feel uncomfortable, for example when we see the broken cups in the farmerâs house. The sounds during the attacks in both films are sharp, harsh, strange and disturbing which build shock because they make the audienceâs heart beat.

At the end of âPsychoâ, there is a resolution. The killer, Norman, is in prison and is punished. However in âThe Birdsâ, there is a cliffhanger as the birds win and the humans flee. The film is unresolved, so it creates tension among the viewers. âPsychoâ is in black and white, which makes it more sinister and frightening for example, the blood in the shower scene looks realistic, even if it was chocolate syrup. Also lighting is used to create shock. For example, in the fruit cellar, the body of 'âmotherâ is brought to life, revealed by the dead bodyâs crazily laughing face, with its eyes moving, lively and brought back to life by the light. The eyes of the corpse that stare at Lilaâs direction appear realistic but they are indeed dead. This can only happen in black and white, as it involves shadow. In contrast, âThe Birdsâ is mostly in colour so it seems less scary and happier at first. However, the blood looks artificial to us because it is bright red. A better use of how Hitchcock used colour was the fire which looks extremely terrifying and dangerous because it is bright orange and yellow, which would not have the same effect in black and white. However, there is a change of the use of colour at the end of the film when it is mainly black and white because of the colour of the birds and also because it is night which creates tension and a sinister atmosphere.

The killers in both films were realistic but strange and unexpected. The story starts in the city, but mostly set in a small rural town where the character is unfamiliar so the audience has sympathy for them. Also the small town is supposed to be safer, but is surprisingly dangerous. The main characters in both films are blond, stylish beautiful women, both motivated by a love interest. Hitchcock uses experts for both films. In âPsychoâ, there is a psychologist who comes at the end and explains Normanâs condition, which is the resolution. The car is pulled out. There is no more tension. In âThe Birdsâ, an ornithologist woman gives information about birds and their behaviour. In âPsychoâ, Norman's hobby is stuffing dead birds and other animals. The birds are, of course, a constant image in âThe Birdsâ.

At the beginning of âThe Birdsâ, we think this is a romantic comedy, when Mitch flirts with Melanie and the lovebirds move side to side in the car, while Melanie is driving in her car. This seems funny as birds do not normally do that. âPsychoâ, however has nothing to do with comedy. In âPsychoâ Marion is serious and poor whereas Melanie is cheerful, spoilt and rich. Both films are misleading because it starts as a romance. In âPsychoâ, Sam has left his ex-wife and now wants to stay with Marion, but he cannot afford to support her economically, so they are both unhappy. In âThe Birdsâ, Mitch too had a previous lover, Annie but now lives with his mum, Lydia and younger sister, Cathy. Both films are a thriller and become dark and sinister. Hitchcock misleads us to make the shocks more shocking.

Hitchcock creates suspense and shock in the way he uses cinematography: camera position, angles, shots, colour, lighting, sound and music. For example, in âNorth by Northwestâ, Hitchcock creates a scene of suspense and shock in the plane scene. There is an extreme long shot of the sky and cornfield and Cary Grant who looks small and helpless, stands waiting. Then a plane tries to attack him. There is a long silence, and he looks for the plane engine. A truck approaches and Hitchcock uses the camera from Caryâs point-of-view of the truck coming closer until it is an extreme close up of the grill of the truck. This creates shock as the grill is coming towards Grantâs face and ours. There is a point-of-view shot of the plane. A close up of Grant shows us he is shocked and a cut to a long shot of the plane coming towards him builds tension. Grant dives under the truck and then there is a great big shock, when the plane crashes into the truck which is leaking petrol and there is a terrific explosion.

In my opinion, I believe Alfred Hitchcock was outstandingly excellent at creating suspense and shock in a number of ways especially in the shower scene, as we know âmotherâ is coming from behind, but Marion doesnât since her back is facing the shower curtain. I preferred the film âPsychoâ as it was more successful in creating suspense and shock, since the film was made in black and white. This made it seem darker, scarier and creepy.

Re: last corrections

Clive — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 23:44:46 GMT

Hi,

My comment about paragraphs remains the same. I've tried to create those, and added a few edits as well.

I am an experienced graphic designer currently looking for permanent employment in London.

I found your publishing company by chance while I was walking along beside the river Thames. However, my knowledge of your business is not accidental. I searched for and studied your portfolio of simple but sophisticated designs, and was really impressed when I realized that your profile matched my own design vision.

My design and artistic abilities are supported by my educational background. Studying at The Academy of Fine Arts in Krakow has helped me gain knowledge across a wide range of graphic design and additionally has prepared me to find my own graphic expression.

These are the reasons it would be a great honour to join your company and become a part of your creative team. I believe that my previous experience has enabled me to work effectively and would give us mutual advantage.

Please find enclosed my CV and PDF portfolio. If you have any questions relating to these, please do not hesitate to contact me.

I would appreciate an opportunity to discuss this matter further with you in an interview.

Clive

Re: What is a "good enough Morgan"?

CalifJim — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 18:27:07 GMT

Melville lived at about the same time as Jackson, so he has taken a contemporary event which his readers would have known about, and used it as a label for a general category of phenomena which he is talking about in this paragraph. "with a view to some sort of covert advantage" is the text that shows the connection between the two, as does the use of the word "corpse".

This usage "his Good-Enough-Morgan" is not really different (in terms of linguistic machinery) from when we speak today of a head of a failed corporation as "having met his Waterloo". "Waterloo" no longer has the same literal meaning in such a context as it had when Napoleon was defeated at Waterloo.

While the Waterloo expression is still known today, the expression Good-Enough-Morgan leaves today's readers with a blank expression on their faces. Nevertheless, the linguistic phenomenon is the same in both cases. I believe that such word associations are called "metonymy".

Re: as of

Avangi — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 15:15:08 GMT

After spending a few hours with this, I feel confident the original poster's dictionary definition of "as of" cannot be correct. Having found no explanation other than my own which describes two different uses, I'm now convinced the MW Unabridged definition is the correct one, and that words like "beginning" and "starting" can have no place in a general definition of the expression.

If the condition did not exist prior to the "as of" point in time, or if the condition is likely to remain intact for a period following the "as of" point in time, then these are characteristics of the condition, and cannot be characteristics of the expression "as of," if only one usage is to be defined.

I believe the poster was correct in feeling that his Bush example does not fit his dictionary's definition. If Bush's approval ratings had been at 20% all during March, April and May, you must certainly be allowed to say that as of April 15 his approval was at 20%. If the speed limit on US interstate highways has been 65 mph for the last five years, and someone asks, "What was the speed limit as of last January?" surely you must be able to answer, "65." Must that answer mean the 65 limit started last January? It's absurd.

Some conditions are stable and some are in flux. Speed limits tend to be stable. Snow accumulation during a major snow storm tends to be in flux. "As of midnight, the accumulation of snow was 26 inches." To say this means the 26-inch condition started at midnight is absurd.

"As of nine o'clock this morning, no injuries from the quake had been reported." If the quake occurred at midnight, what time did this condition start? Are we supposed to take this as meaning, "Starting at nine o'clock this morning, no injuries from the quake had been reported." ?? Again, absurd.

If we must accept the poster's dictionary definition, then we must replace "as of" with "at," in the last two paragraphs.

Best wishes, - A.

Edit. I note that Marius' post agrees with MW Unabridged.

Re: correction

Avangi — Sun, 25 May 2008 04:06:32 GMT

The language is quite good.

I'm not sure if you mean to imply that the picture is of a one-man boat. The way the sentence flows, you expect both statements to relate to comparing the size. I've never been sailing. Does the term "skipper" specifically refer to the person who handles the tiller? We use it as a friendly term for the captain, or the person in charge. "The skipper" = "The captain." You address him casually as "Skipper." I could be wrong, but I think "crew" always refers to a group of more than one. I guess you could say, "a crew of one," like "a party of one." I believe "crewman" or "crew member" would refer to one individual. (I note you use "crew member" the second time, but the first time might be a problem.)

How about paragraphs? May we occasionally have a new paragraph? The thing about the partner and the class comes out of the blue, or "off the wall." You need to somehow introduce that you're taking a class. Otherwise we say, "What the heck is this?"

Re the "After long" sentence, you at least need a comma after "consideration." It was difficult for me to parse on my first try. It's sort of a compound introductory phrase - one prepositional, and one participial. I'm not sure if it would be better, were they of the same genre. It may be considered an error that "after long consideration" appears to refer to you, and I don't believe it really does. (After long consideration, I sailed)

There's a small time-frame problem in the next non-paragraph. You had sailed out to the calm lake. From whence? It sounds like it might have taken a while. If it's a large lake, and we commence from a dock at the edge of it, we'd say, "I sailed out into the lake." If, on the other hand, our dock is located on some kind of an inlet, we could say "I sailed out to the lake [proper]. Either way, it sounds like you covered some distance. The weather changed abruptly "shortly after that." Then you say, "I was not far from the dock, as I'd just left." It doesn't "add up."

"The calm weather, all of a sudden, turned violent." This interruption in the flow of the sentence spoils the urgency of it. Try, "The calm weather suddenly turned violent," or "Suddenly the calm weather turned violent."

Re "the two students," there's not really a clear antecedent (wrong word). I'd say, "and its two students were in the water." The expression is "treading water," but you can't say "water" twice. You need to work something else out.

Re "another boat followed," I know what you mean, but "followed" is ambiguous here (followed you around?). How about, "another boat met the same fate."? (Moby Dick: "and all save one shall follow")

"on a jet ski" set off with commas. "rode to the rescue"

To me, it was a great experience. OR It was a great experience for me.

Best wishes, - A.

Re: Is this paragraph correct Thanks! j

Mister Micawber — Thu, 08 May 2008 11:51:17 GMT

.
I have underlined some problem areas:

Writing is one of the powerful tools that a person can have because it expresses who we are as a person. Itâs a key to achievement in school, in the workplace, Writing equips you with the communication and thinking skills you need to participate effectively in today democracy. In today society men and women have different way of writing. Men write sloppier and women write nicer. Women tend to have a better writing skill than men, because typically stereotype for women is that they are smart and they have good writing skill. [Your logic fails you here.] Men tend to be more on an aggressive side when it comes to writing, because the way that they write is more like how men would write [ Another short-circuit in your logic throughout this sentence ] they would usually write in a tone that should sound like it should be written by men and not a woman. Women write beautiful handwriting and men write like a comic style writing. Therefore, Men and Women all have the same writing skill itâs not about who write better or not because some women may write like how men would write and some men may write like how women would write itâs just a stereotypical thing we have for how men and women write.

This essay is a miserable failure of logic and expression, and no amount of grammar correction can save it. Start again with a different topic.