In Hyphens^x, Irony^x

I find your sentence very satisfactory. It may be Jane Austenish but there is no law against such language even today. Why should everybody speak and write in exactly the same way in English? People don't do that in many other languages. I see no mistakes in punctuation or hyphens but I know...

"Their disdain rarely failed to evoke in him a delayed sense of self-irony not at all fatal in nature." First of all, is that sentence at all grammatically correct? Did I miss any hyphens? Punctuation? What about the style, does it sound too literary or archaic? How would you...