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Plzzzzz help me to improve this Letter of motivation- my deadline is 8 Feb

Novrain — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 12:57:24 GMT

Adress

1^st February 2007

Regarding: LETTER OF MOTIVATION

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a civil designer of an A company, which is a branch of renowned B Corporation. When finding out of this master program Civil Engineering I immediately knew I want to be a part of it. With this letter I would like to apply for the admission as a graduate student in your Scholarship for Master of Science in Civil Engineering program and through it I'd like to bring you closer how deeply I would like to become a student of your course and why I think you'd make a great decision choosing me.

As Iâve already mentioned, before taking over present position I worked for CCC a leading state company in construction. At here I worked as a structural engineer and participated in designing high-rise buildings. I am very proud of them because they were the first high-rise buildings in my country applied innovative methods of designing and execution: precast/prestressed concrete for structure system and âlift-formâ execution. Presently I am working in a completely fresh field: iron metal factory with my responsibility of designing particular structure systems for giant industrial machines. In any position of a structural engineer I also learn how to apply my theorical knowledge into practice that gives me a good structural sensibility and exact data analysis.

Three years of working in not only civil but also industrial construction projects I have met many fresh, interesting and difficult issues in designing which are never written in textbooks, if any available, their contents are very simple. These issues are dealing with earth quake, the tremor of high-rise building due to seismic load, fatigue failure of reinforced concrete structures due to cycle loads, design and execution of prestressed concrete, etc. I confront awkward circumstances in real designing that in my opinion they can be solved easily by using prestressed concrete structures. A more critical matter is that how to protect this kind of buildings against natural and serviceable risks. Gradually one studying plan is beginning to take shape in my mind more and more in detail. I want to study prestressed concrete thoroughly. My research proposal should be âDynamic responses of prestressed concrete long span beams imposed vibrating loadsâ.

It is after a good deal of thought and self-evaluation that I have decided to pursue a Masterâs Degree in Civil Engineering. The decision was made after careful deliberation in taking into objective my ultimate professional ambition, which is to pursue the research career in this field. The curricula at X University introduced me to a wide gamut of subjects, both in and outside the field and provided me with a strong footing in the theoretical concepts of civil engineering. Iâm a highly motivated, initiative; hard-working, ambitious in studying and non-stop cultivate my mind. I always improve my practical experience by regular contacting with my university professors and various enhanced international technical seminars. In addition, with my proficiency in computer, using structural analysis software and writing report Iâm confident to taking part in higher research career.

The master program in Civil Engineering with many interesting courses is exactly what I have been looking for a long time. I believe that your university with its sophisticated facilities, competent faculty and good studying environment would be an ideal place for me to pursue graduate studies and realize my career goals. Furthermore, Italia with its history of architecture and building techniques as well as the history, the image and the identity of cities prods me coming to Italia to experience this unreachable set of positive values. Iâm eager to taste pizza at its fatherland and watch football matches as a real Italian. This is also a wonderful chance for me to introduce my countryâs culture to international friends.

Itâs really important for me to receive scholarship. In fact that my financial condition canât afford me to pursue any abroad study programs. My family has a tradition of research, my father is a professor and my mother is a doctor. My parents often say that they can help me but they are pure teachers at university. The most valuable thing they give me is not finance however the passion for researching and a serious attitude in science. With financial aid I will wholeheartedly dedicate my capacity for this master program.

I'm sure you have already got an idea of how much I'd like to come and become a graduate student in your master program, but all the same, I'll use one more opportunity to express how strongly I desire to pursue my research career at your campus.

I thank you for the time you spend reading this letter. I am looking forward to a positive response.

Yours sincerely,

Please consider my letter of motivation and give me advice !!!

Anonymous — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 16:27:33 GMT

Adress

1^st February 2007

Regarding: LETTER OF MOTIVATION

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am a civil designer of an AAA company, BBB, which is a branch of renowned BBB Corporation. When finding out of this master program Civil Engineering I immediately knew I want to be a part of it. With this letter I would like to apply for the admission as a graduate student in your Scholarship for Master of Science in Civil Engineering program and through it I'd like to bring you closer how deeply I would like to become a student of your course and why I think you'd make a great decision choosing me.

As Iâve already mentioned, before taking over present position I worked for ZZZ, a leading state company in construction. At here I worked as a structural engineer and participated in designing high-rise buildings. I am very proud of them because they were the first high-rise buildings in my country applied innovative methods of designing and execution: precast/prestressed concrete for structure system and âlift-formâ execution. Presently I am working in a completely fresh field: iron metal factory with my responsibility of designing particular structure systems for giant industrial machines. In any position of a structural engineer I also learn how to apply my theorical knowledge into practice that gives me a good structural sensibility and exact data analysis.

Three years of working in not only civil but also industrial construction projects I have met many fresh, interesting and difficult issues in designing which are never written in textbooks, if any available, their contents are very simple. These issues are dealing with earth quake, the tremor of high-rise building due to seismic load, fatigue failure of reinforced concrete structures due to cycle loads, design and execution of prestressed concrete, etc. I confront awkward circumstances in real designing that in my opinion they can be solved easily by using prestressed concrete structures. A more critical matter is that how to protect this kind of buildings against natural and serviceable risks. Gradually one studying plan is beginning to take shape in my mind more and more in detail. I want to study prestressed concrete thoroughly. My research proposal should be âDynamic response of prestressed concrete long span beams imposed vibrating loadsâ.

It is after a good deal of thought and self-evaluation that I have decided to pursue a Masterâs Degree in Civil Engineering. The decision was made after careful deliberation in taking into objective my ultimate professional ambition, which is to pursue the research career in this field. The curricula at YYY university introduced me to a wide gamut of subjects, both in and outside the field and provided me with a strong footing in the theoretical concepts of civil engineering. Iâm a highly motivated, initiative; hard-working, ambitious in studying and non-stop cultivate my mind. I always improve my practical experience by regular contacting with my university professors and various enhanced international technical seminars. In addition, with my proficiency in computer, using structural analysis software and writing report Iâm confident to taking part in higher research career.

I thank you for the time you spend reading this letter. I am looking forward to a positive response.

Yours sincerely,

Re: Time is limited...help me with my motivation letter...THX!!!

reviver4dream — Mon, 04 Apr 2005 07:03:36 GMT

Ooo,Abbie, I do think this revision looks better, could you help me once again:)
I am not sure about several phrases , can you help correct them? Thanks:)

LETTER OF MOTIVATION

Dear Sir or Madam:

During my education to date, my strength of character and determination to fulfil my goals enabled me to work hard and achieve good grades. Now I find myself ready to reach out for a higher educational goal, and I am applying to you to study for a BA in Cultural Anthropology and Developmental Science

My education in China was broad, including studies of Chinese ancient and modern history, modern history of the world, political economics, philosophy etc. . This variety of topics enabled me to gain an awareness of the humanities and its development. Although favouring the social sciences, I incorporated other science subjects and mathematics into my studies, which I believe has brought me much more effective tools and techniques wherever in logical analysis or rational conclusion, and moreover, it has endowed me with an objective and comprehensive attitude.

My special interest in geography has been aroused since I was a little girl, who often stood against a huge map staring at it curiously. The fascination is still there and I own a collection of maps and atlases, which supports me in my studies. I enjoy reading travel notes and magazines, and am keen on documentaries about different cultures and customs. The read about the Nobel Prize winner Pearl S. Buckâs autobiography has sent me an enlightenment saying that the best way to observe and savour a certain society or community, is to live amongst the people and get mingled with them. However, to get a systematic education and research training in such realm first is a necessity, it could help me better explore and refine the essence.

What has motivated me doesnât limit in the very courses, but the University of Leiden and the great city in which it lies. The history, the academic records, and the applied achievements dedicated to the world over, especially the universityâs historical commitment to critical thinking and the art of debate raised my interest. As an independent thinker I would love to take part in that ongoing process of change.

Furthermore, the University of Leiden owns a unique library of Chinese literature, and is undoubtedly the centre of Sinology in Europe. Touching my own country and cultural origin from an outside perspective seems to be challenging to me as well, but I do believe that from a brand new angle, I could better understand my own culture and the comparison with other countries.

During the application process, the officerâs rapid, detailed and sincere responses to my innumerable questions ensured me of my choice.

I consider myself to be insightful, intuitive and adventurous. During an unforgettable traveling to a thermal spring and water-eroded cave with a large group of contemporaries, we were shown the great landscape and figures made by the local people hundreds of years ago, from which Iâve felt the huge power of creativity and the importance of our being organized orderly, otherwise some of the spots would be ignored unconsciously. And the availability of team co-operation, core decision-making is beneficial.

The experience of being a conductor of a 60-people chorus and the planner of the whole performance, which had been put on in the municipal theatre of Hefei as a celebration of the New Year 2002, has given me a valuable and practical experience in disposing the divarication, coordination, and strategic planning. As the last programme in that celebration, with my calm and active conducting and guiding, it earned the warmest applause of the 1000 people in the audience. Learning to play the accordion for years provided me with the profound comprehension of music and the leading singing by myself during the practice period did encourage and capture the members of the chorus, which allowed me to make the performance a success.

Although Iâve got little chance to play football, for the pitch is always been occupied by boys, I am eager for being a participant singing and cheering there in the stadium together with the crazy fans dressed in the same color, waving the team flags. Itâs obvious that here in China thereâs rare such circumstance for football.

I believe that studying and engaging in extracurricular activities at your institution would improve my communication skills, and enrich my life experience.

Thank you very much for considering my request. I look forward to your positive response.

Yours sincerely,
Guo Ying

?:)secondly, what type of characters is formal ??or can I just choose the one that appears clearly and nice?:)