In Personal statements^x, Commas^x

.I have stricken out some inappropriate material and underlined other problem areas. You have trouble with commas:Honestly, I still did not know exactly what I wanted to study, when I was almost done with school. On one hand I was interested in the regular German program of Business Studies...

Hi MountainHiker, I made a few changes...what do u think ? Personal Statement1000 word limit ESSAY A - Autobiographical Essay: Give us your best writing. Tell us about yourself. You can include information on your family, significant persons, places and events in your life, what interests you,...