Search results for 'tag:Prepositions tag:Proofreading' matching tags 'Prepositions' and 'Proofreading'

Re: proofreading of funny article

Skrej — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 21:39:08 GMT

changeling
Hi everybody!

I was translating a kind funny recipe. Could you, please, check the following passages? Does it sound good? Do I need any improvement?

You will need eggs to make this apple pie. If you've run out of them, get dressed and rush out to the store. And get iodine, cleansers, soap, bandage and sticking plaster, too. On your way back, grab some flour, apples and sugar. So, you come back home and go to your kitchen right away. While unloading your purchases you will surely drop a few of eggs on the floor. Donât worry about that, just beat remaining 5 (put the number first - 5 remaining eggs) eggs into a bowl. C l (This is a typo, I think - delete it) Clean the kitchen floor, or else it will be slippery. Now follow directions carefully. Take your mixer and start beating eggs. Your mixer wonât work? Just try to switch it on. It did no difference? (use made, instead of did - It made no difference?) You probably have to place the blades. (Say 'insert' instead of 'place', or say "put the blades in" instead of place the blades. Also, you might want to say 'beaters' instead of blades) So now you can beat the eggs. When you finish splashing beaten eggs all over the place you will want to have a shower. Wash yourself very well and get the yolk out of your nose. And finally, wash your clothes.

You have three (Earlier you said 5 eggs in the bowl, now 3 - is this intentional? Does this mean the person splashed out 2 eggs?) beaten yolks in the bowl and that's enough to make our apple pie. Now find old newspapers and magazines and paste (I'd use 'cover' instead of paste) the entire kitchen with them. Cover your furniture with some waste blanket (Subject/verb agreement error here - either say 'some waste blankets' or 'a waste blanket) if you don't plan to buy new furniture. Take (Missing a definite article 'the' here) flour package and put about a cup of flour into the bowl. Gather the flour you spilt on a table (forget about the flour scattered on the floor) and put it back to the package. Make sure youâve pasted (Again, I'd use 'covered' instead of pasted) all the walls and the ceiling in the kitchen properly. Now blend the eggs with the flour.

You need a bath again. Wash all that beaten mixture (Simpler just to use the word 'batter' here instead of 'beaten mixture) off. Take a sharp knife. Well, that's where you need iodine, bandage (either 'a bandage' or 'bandages) and sticking plaster. Peel five apples. Apply iodine to your cuts and bandage your fingers. Stick (Use 'apply' here instead of 'stick' ) the plaster. Now, cut (Again, you're missing the definite article 'the' here) apples. Keep in mind, though, we need two apples for our pie, so feel free to eat the rest of them while cooking. (Consider rewording this sentence slightly. It's gramatically ok, but a bit confusing. I'd say use either one of these two options: (1) Keep in mind, though, we need two apples for our pie, so don't eat all of them. or (2) Keep in mind, we only need 2 apples for our pie, so feel free to eat the rest of them while cooking.) Pick up all apple pieces you dropped on the floor and wash them in running water. Add apples and sugar to the dough. Beat the ingredients. Clean up all those nasty spots on the fridge and windows, or else they will dry up which will make cleaning much harder.

Pour what's left in the bowl in a frying pan (A frying pan is for frying, but you're putting the pan in the oven to bake. I think you mean baking pan.) Forgot to coat your frying pan (baking pan?) with oil? That's ok, just pour the mixture back in the bowl. Now wash the frying pan, (baking pan?) towel it dry and coat with vegetable oil. Wash your hands and again pour the dough in the frying pan. (baking pan?) Place in the oven. If your pie still looks pretty much the same after an hour of baking, check if you turned the heat on. So now the heat is on and you can take a rest. As you wake up suddenly, open all windows, doors and your oven. Bring (Use 'give' or 'make' instead of 'bring'.) your apologies to your neighbors and convince them that there was no fire. Now that you've recovered from all that shock, call your darling and say you gonna make something special for the dinner. Make (Use 'go to' or 'head to/for' instead of 'make') for the store again and buy a cake and a bottle of wine, or even something stiffer. Unpack the cake and put it on the frying pan (Again, use 'baking pan' but you'll need to use the preposition 'in' instead of 'on. - Unpack the cake and put in the baking pan). Greet your darling!

Hi Changeling,

You did a pretty good job with your funny recipe, but I commented on a few minor errors. Feel free to ask for further clarification if my comments don't make sense.

Hope this helps!

Re: proofreading#19

nona the brit — Wed, 15 Nov 2006 14:31:42 GMT

1 I don't think you want phony here. 2. for me to me? 3. This sentence does not make sense. 4. you already know this is incorrect. 5.7, 8and 12. problems but you are asking about them in other posts. 6. missing preposition. 9. incorrect. 10. whose? 11 article.

The favorite thing for me in the book was that Holden talked about phony1 things.

After I read 'Catcher in the Rye', I asked myself what it was about. I had to find out what Holden meant by 'catcher in the rye'. Even though I found it somewhere, I still didn't understand how it related to the book. When I read this book, it was very easy for me to me 2. Usually when I read a book I need a dictionary, but not with this book. On the top of it, the book is thin 3. What was good about the book for me was as if I had been through some of the situations that Holden went through 4.

I still remember a few things in the book. Holden was expelled again from school because his academic performance was horrible. He just came back from a game in New York Someone told Holden that the professor wanted to see him, so he went to see him. The way he thought of his professor and his wife was kind of interesting. When he left the professor office, he went back to his dorm, packing and stacking his stuff and was ready to go home. 5. I think in the dorm he reflected 6 his school time. Above all, he thought about his classmates and roommates. Moreover, he thought about his older brother who was some sort of successful writer in LA. I remember his classmate asked him to write an essay because he was good at it. I think he also mentioned about some of his classmates going to good school after senior year.

When he left his school, he went to a train station. On the train, he met a woman who said his son went to the same school as he did. 7. He knew her son and said good things about him. Actually he did not like him. Actually I thought Holden was not a phony person. That is one of the reasons I like Holden very much.

When he arrived in New York, he stayed at the hotel because he did not want to see his parents yet. His parents were definitely disappointed 8 his performance at school. It was not his first time to have been kicked out. He stayed at the hotel. Then I do not remember what he did much. I think he called a girl who he knew but her mother said she was not home. Later, the girl invited him to a party. She introduced him to her friend who was from Prinction. Holden was thinking what a big deal he was going to Princton. spellings!

The next day he went to the bar in the hotel and sat in the back. He ordered the9 soda and scotch. The way he thought of those women fascinated me. He danced with them. He thought one of them was beautiful. Others were not great. Those women wanted to see the superstar Gary Cooper because he hung around here once.

The other thing he did was that he wanted to see her10 little sister very much. He called home but his mom picked up the phone. Holden met his sister at her school somewhere near the Natural History museum. He told her that he wanted to go away and only wanted to live somewhere, with the girl he adored.

Another day he slipped back home when his parents were away.

It was interesting that he talked about ducks in the central park when he was in the cab.

I still remember that someone in the hotel gave him a phone number to call 11 prostitute. Anyway he paid for the service but he did not do it.

In the last part of the book, Holden wanted to get way from NY. He called his sister to say goodbye. His little sister, packing her stuff, with all her money, insisted to go with him 12. They met in the zoo but they did not leave.

Re: Urgent! please help me to proofreading it..

julielai — Fri, 13 Oct 2006 04:13:21 GMT

Hi,

Is this a JUPAS essay? The content is okay. Some problems with grammar and wording.

I've highlighted the parts that you need to fix.

To be a business woman has long been my dream. It (Do not use pronoun here) not only helps me to develop a logical and analytical mind, but also enrich my knowledge. This knowledge also enable (verb agreement) me to serve myself and (too self-serving) the community. So I have chosen Marketing for my major.

Learning the development of practical skills and academic and professional knowledge is one of the reasons why I have chosen (article) Marketing programme. It has a strong emphasis on interactive and student-centred learning methods. It also provides a comprehensive business education, which has attracted (wording) me to put it as my first choice.

Besides, I have the (You haven't got the chance yet) chance to visit (wording) companies overseas and companies in the mainland to conduct project work and to present our findings at the annual marketing symposium. I can also spend a semester studying in another university overseas or in the mainland. It is a good chance (wording) to step beyond (wording) Hong Kong and experience other countriesâlife and culture.

After completing this programme, I can learn a lot of skills such as communication (adj. here) and oratorical skill. This knowledge can significantly serve (wording) myself. The oratorical skill can enrich my social circle (not really). The analytical skill learn (verb form) from the programme also enable_ (singular) me to train (wording) my thought, and develop my logical and analytical mind. These skills will greatly affect my interpersonal relationship and my career in the future.

In addition, this knowledge can help me serve the community. I will apply the critical thinking learn (same here) from the programme to solve real and practical business problems in the marketing world. The analytical and communication skills also enable me to face the challenge and serve in an increasingly complex business environment. Furthermore, I hope I can play a part in using the key business knowledge and skills to deal confidently with broad issues in a global business environment. Even if I do not pursue in marketing in the future, I will try my best to put into practice what has been learned.

In conclusion, the programme I have chosen of study helps realize my goal. I will try my best to fulfill my dream to be a successful business woman. After graduation, I will also endeavor to serve the community and contribute _ _ (preposition) business world.

preposition II

Lcchang — Thu, 07 Sep 2006 07:49:05 GMT

The boss likes to type and to proofread her own letters.

The boos likes to type and proofread her own letters.

The boss like typing and proofreading her own letters.

Mr. Wang likes to arrive early or to stay late to get his work done.

Mr. Wang likes to arrive early or stay late to get his work done.

Do they all sound ok to you? Why or why not? Please advise.

Re: Would you mind proofreading this? (It's short)

Clive — Tue, 04 Oct 2005 04:09:22 GMT

Hi again,

In my view / In my opinion / From my point of view, Buenos Aires is less expensive than many cities in Europe. This may be Â´[*I'm not sure about the use of may be here, it could also be: This is (perhaps) ]... because our currency is cheaper than the euro or the British pound. As a South American capital, Buenos Aires looks far more Eurpean [I don't think either Europeanish or Europeanist are suitable here, I don't even know if they exist. They don't, they are terrible To convey a similar idea, I'd rather say "Europeanized". OK I'd like to know more about the uses of the suffixes -ish, -ist] than Sao Paulo or the Mexican DF. In addition, Buenos Aires is still smashednot a good word at all. Find another. Crushed? by the economic [If not, it gives the idea of "being cheap" rather than relating to Economy] crisis, but remains you need to omit 'being' being as captivating as it used to be. Taxi [not "Taxis", for it is a noun modifying another noun] drivers are as crazy as Mexican ones [otherwise, we would be referring to the entire population of Mexico. Anyway, "ones" doesn't seem a far better option, any suggestions?].their Mexican counterparts In the end, it is [or Buenos Aires is... (if not, we have a subjectless construction), but does "it" have a clear referent?] I'd say Buenos Aires a nice place to spend a holiday (in) [I think we need the preposition here, if not, the construction dangles]No, you don't need 'in' , but you must be awake / alert alert is good, awake is not to avoid [I don't know what he meant by "slalom", do you use the word in this sense? it means to avoid in the sense of moving forward while going around obstacles. The metaphor is from skiing, where slalom racers swerve around flags I think "avoid is the meaning he's trying to convey] the negative points. [I somewhat restructured the sentence for I think it sounds more natural, but I don'k know if the correction is necessary].

Once again, you've done an excellent job.

Clive

Would you mind proofreading this? (It's short)

Riglos — Tue, 04 Oct 2005 02:06:21 GMT

Hi people!

Correcting is giving me a really hard time and I'd appreciate it if you could take some minutes to read this since you've been so helpful!!

Here's the original version:

In my point of view, Buenos Aires is less expensive than many cities in Europe. This is may be because our currency is cheaper than the euro or the British pound. As a South American capital, Buenos Aires looks far more Eurpeanist / Europeanish than Sao Paulo or the Mexican DF. In addition, Buenos Aires is still smashed by the economical crisis, but remains being as captivating as it used to be. Taxis drivers are as crazy as Mexicans. In the end, is a nice place to spend a holiday, but you must slalom the negative points. So be awake.

Below, my version:

In my view / In my opinion / From my point of view, Buenos Aires is less expensive than many cities in Europe. This may be Â´[*I'm not sure about the use of may be here, it could also be: This is (perhaps) ]... because our currency is cheaper than the euro or the British pound. As a South American capital, Buenos Aires looks far more Eurpean [I don't think either Europeanish or Europeanist are suitable here, I don't even know if they exist. To convey a similar idea, I'd rather say "Europeanized". I'd like to know more about the uses of the suffixes -ish, -ist] than Sao Paulo or the Mexican DF. In addition, Buenos Aires is still smashed by the economic [If not, it gives the idea of "being cheap" rather than relating to Economy] crisis, but remains being as captivating as it used to be. Taxi [not "Taxis", for it is a noun modifying another noun] drivers are as crazy as Mexican ones [otherwise, we would be referring to the entire population of Mexico. Anyway, "ones" doesn't seem a far better option, any suggestions?]. In the end, it is [or Buenos Aires is... (if not, we have a subjectless construction), but does "it" have a clear referent?]a nice place to spend a holiday (in) [I think we need the preposition here, if not, the construction dangles], but you must be awake / alert to avoid [I don't know what he meant by "slalom", do you use the word in this sense? I think "avoid is the meaning he's trying to convey] the negative points. [I somewhat restructured the sentence for I think it sounds more natural, but I don'k know if the correction is necessary].

Thanks a lot for any comments or suggestions you can make!!

Regards,

Mara.

Proofreading & Grammar

camilus — Fri, 19 Mar 2004 16:57:17 GMT

Could you please check the following sentences and correct them for me?

Proofreading

1. He would tennis when he was a teenager and still plays now.
2. It's up to me I won't be denied, it's better to lose than never have tried to fight for love. (Does the preposition for mean here because of love or in order to find this love?)

Grammatical Structures

We say that Present Perfect Continuous expresses the idea that something started in the past and has countinud up till now, but it may still continue in the future like in the examples:

- She has been reading Hamlet. (She has reached a half-way point of the book and will still read it until the book is done.)
- She has been teaching Chemistry in the univerity. (She is a teacher and her teaching will still continue.)

But what about the sentence recited by Vader in Star Wars to Luke: I've been waiting for you. Doesn't his waiting ends with the moment he says the sentence?

Thank you very much in advance
Best regards.