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Re: Help proofreading "A Doll's House"

Mister Micawber — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 05:53:58 GMT

I have underlined some problem areas:

The Woman Within the Doll

The Baltimore Sun wrote that back in 1879, âA Doll's Houseâ by Henrik Ibsen âshocked and offended people wherever [it] was played,â and that the dramatist assured it was not about a woman, but about âanyone who had to live according to the rules created by othersâ (Hyder). Society thought to be outrageous that a woman would get involved in manly things, for her role in society was exclusively to care for the family and please her husband. Women did not enjoy the rights women do now. They were not taken seriously, and decisions were made by the man who was and still is considered the head of the family. Nora's choice to become free, independent and leave her husband, along with some of the characters' actions made this play to be scandalous for its time.

Ibsen wrote in a letter that the story in âA Doll's Houseâ was about a woman who feels:

" Oppressed and bewildered by belief in authority, she loses her faith in her own moral right and ability to bring up her children... [She is bittered because,] like certain insects, (ought to) go away and die when she has done her duty towards the continuance of the species... [she shakes] off of cares, [but then she feels] a sudden return of apprehension and dread. She must bear it all aloneâ (Doll).

Nora had a beautiful life, she had a husband, beautiful children, and everything she wanted. Earlier in her marriage, his husband suffered of an illness of which he needed to recover somewhere in the south, but this was concealed from him by the doctor and Nora. Not having the means to afford a trip so costly and out of love and desperation, Nora decides to ask for a loan without letting Tolvard know. She forges her father's signature to obtain the loan because she does not want to trouble her father either, who is very ill himself too. However, she is responsible and works secretly from home in order to make the payments. Eventually, Tolvard finds out about her secret and feels that his life, happiness and reputation will be lost once Krogstad, who lent the money, publishes the then scandalous situation out of revenged for having fired him from the bank he now manages. He quickly turns against her. That is the moment when Nora starts to understand things she did not understand before; she realizes she does not love Tolvard anymore just as he does not really love her as she thought, and decides to leave for good to discover herself. [Too many pronouns-- I don't know who's doing what to whom]

The scenery consists of the Helmer's apartment and nowhere else. The description of the apartment depicts the decision that Nora will have to make. There is a door to the right which leads to the entryway and another to the left which leads to Helmer's study. Nora will have to decide which door to take: freedom or Helmer [Tolvard / Helmer: we don't know if they are one or two]. The place is not âexpensively furnishedâ, but it is comfortable, just like Nora's marriage, she lives a comfortable life, but there are certain things she lacks that are more important than riches. No woman could even consider back in the 1800s doing such a scandalous things as to leave not only the husband, but her children too.

The main character in the story is Nora, a seemingly selfish, materialistic woman who cares a lot about money and in living a good life. This is to be expected since her father liked to spend money himself and live a life he could only could afford with credit. He used to called her his âdoll-child, and he played with [her] the way [she] played with [her] dollsâ (Ibsen 1041). She was obviously very protected and spoiled by both, her father and her husband, who provided anything she needed or wanted. Her father raised her not think for herself and just play her role in society. âWhile [she] was at home with [her] father, he used to tell [her] all his opinions, and [she] held the same opinions. If [she] had others [she] said nothing about them, because he wouldn't have liked itâ (1041) [All the bracketed pronouns are distracting; it would be better to give the exact quotes]. This repeated again as a married woman; she would not express her opinion to Tolvard, for they never talked seriously, but seemed to have trusted Dr. Rank better. Norah was greatly misunderstood. She was a loving person, she loved her husband so much that she was willing to forge her father's signature to obtain a loan to take her husband south in order for him to recover from a deadly illness [You said all this before; cut it.]. She is willing to do anything for him. Eventually she realized she does not have to play the doll anymore. One can only imagine people's reaction throughout the play's events.

Tolvard Helmer seemed [Be consistent in verb tenses] to be an ideal husband. He is loving, admirable, honest, ethical, hard-working and successful, but there seems to be a dark side of him. He is a prideful man, he won't ask for money to anyone, to [Commas are not conjunctions.] do so would be humiliating. To him, honor and appearances are more important than family. He does not believe people can change and become good, as he did not believe Krogstad was a good person although he had been honest for a long time already. Also, he is so affectionate that makes one wonder of his sincerity; he calls Nora diminutive names such as featherbrained, spendthrift [These are not diminutives.] , a squirrel, a song-bird, lark, strange little being all the time (994). One cannot think of a woman who would like being called like that and who would not be affected emotionally. Tolvard's reaction after finding out Nora's secret is amusing. He had told Nora that sometimes he wished â[she] was in some terrible danger, just so [he] could take [his] life and soul and everything, for [her] sakeâ (1038), yet he quickly turns against her calling her a wretched woman, a criminal, unprincipled, untrustworthy of raising her children, incapable, etc. His hypocrisy is clearly revealed when as soon as he realizes that Nora's mistake won't affect his reputation he forgives her (1039-1949). There's a saying that goes something like a good friend is hard to find, specially during difficult times; Tolvard was nor a good friend neither that perfect husband he seemed to be. He loved to have control of his wife's life, and his conversations usually tend to imply that Nora would be lost without him; that she needed his guidance and teaching. Tolvard did not love Nora, â[he] thought it fun to be in love with [her]â (1041).

Dr. Rank is in love with Nora, and that seems to have been the main reason he visited the Helmer's house. This character is not essential in the play, but it causes outrage when he dares to reveal Nora his secret. This is almost vulgar for him to do, and very dishonorable, specially during those times in which people were very conservative. It is as if he had taken advantage of the trust the family had in it and ended up tarnishing his reputation.

Mrs. Linde is one of Nora's old friends from school. She gave up her true love for money, but in the end things did not turn out the way she had expected. Her husband died leaving her in a terrible financial situation making [On the other hand, commas are essential for separating dependent clauses.] it necessary for her to work in order to sustain her mother and brothers. After her mother passed away and her brothers did not need her help she left town. Not to have someone to take care of made her feel âcompletely alone in the worldâ, and it frightened her âto be so empty and lostâ (1032). She needed âsomeone to take care ofâ, she wanted to be a mother and wanted the companionship of a husband. In the end, she was supposed to have helped Nora hide her secret. She could have convinced Mr. Krogstad to get the letter back, but she did not intercede (1033). She might have been envious of Nora, after all, Nora had all she was longing for; a husband, beautiful children, and a good life.

Lastly, Krogstad is the one who lent Nora money to save her husband, and threatens her to tell her husband if she does not convince Tolvard to let him keep his job at the bank, but just as Nora did, he once made a mistake, which caused him to loose his reputation. He was a man who seems to have been harden by life's difficulties. When he was left by the woman he dearly loved âit was as if all the solid ground dissolved from under [his] feetâ (1031). This might have caused him to become the âhalf-drownedâ kind of man, as he refers to himself. After finding love in his life he turns from the revengeful person into a forgiving one.

In conclusion, Nora realized of her true value as a human being and as a woman. She decides to leave everything and everyone, husband, children, luxuries to a journey to liberate herself. To do such thing was unthinkable at that time and caused turmoil, but it was the best choice she could ever make. To leave one's children is a terrible things to do and was not necessary, but looking beyond that, without prejudices, it is not hard to understands she is trying to figure out who she really is and what she believes in. This is essential to one's happiness; therefore she is determined to make necessary changes in her life even if people think bad of her. It seems that daring to do so back in the 1800s was just as bad as selling drugs or prostituting oneself.

Help proofreading "A Doll's House"

Anonymous — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 03:40:25 GMT

I have finished writing an essay, which is due tomorrow. As an ESL student, I have the feeling that I have a lot of grammatical mistakes. Is there any sentence where you wonder what the heck I am trying to say? Hope anyone can help!

The Woman Within the Doll

Ibsen wrote in a letter that the story in âA Doll's Houseâ was about a woman who feels:

ppressed and bewildered by belief in authority, she loses her faith in her own moral right and ability to bring up her children... [She is bittered because,] like certain insects, (ought to) go away and die when she has done her duty towards the continuance of the species... [she shakes] off of cares, [but then she feels] a sudden return of apprehension and dread. She must bear it all aloneâ (Doll).

The scenery consists of the Helmer's apartment and nowhere else. The description of the apartment depicts the decision that Nora will have to make. There is a door to the right which leads to the entryway and another to the left which leads to Helmer's study. Nora will have to decide which door to take: freedom or Helmer. The place is not âexpensively furnishedâ, but it is comfortable, just like Nora's marriage, she lives a comfortable life, but there are certain things she lacks that are more important than riches. No woman could even consider back in the 1800s doing such a scandalous things as to leave not only the husband, but her children too.

The main character in the story is Nora, a seemingly selfish, materialistic woman who cares a lot about money and in living a good life. This is to be expected since her father liked to spend money himself and live a life he could only could afford with credit. He used to called her his âdoll-child, and he played with [her] the way [she] played with [her] dollsâ (Ibsen 1041). She was obviously very protected and spoiled by both, her father and her husband, who provided anything she needed or wanted. Her father raised her not think for herself and just play her role in society. âWhile [she] was at home with [her] father, he used to tell [her] all his opinions, and [she] held the same opinions. If [she] had others [she] said nothing about them, because he wouldn't have liked itâ (1041). This repeated again as a married woman; she would not express her opinion to Tolvard, for they never talked seriously, but seemed to have trusted Dr. Rank better. Norah was greatly misunderstood. She was a loving person, she loved her husband so much that she was willing to forge her father's signature to obtain a loan to take her husband south in order for him to recover from a deadly illness. She is willing to do anything for him. Eventually she realized she does not have to play the doll anymore. One can only imagine people's reaction throughout the play's events.

Tolvard Helmer seemed to be an ideal husband. He is loving, admirable, honest, ethical, hard-working and successful, but there seems to be a dark side of him. He is a prideful man, he won't ask for money to anyone, to do so would be humiliating. To him, honor and appearances are more important than family. He does not believe people can change and become good, as he did not believe Krogstad was a good person although he had been honest for a long time already. Also, he is so affectionate that makes one wonder of his sincerity; he calls Nora diminutive names such as featherbrained, spendthrift, a squirrel, a song-bird, lark, strange little being all the time (994). One cannot think of a woman who would like being called like that and who would not be affected emotionally. Tolvard's reaction after finding out Nora's secret is amusing. He had told Nora that sometimes he wished â[she] was in some terrible danger, just so [he] could take [his] life and soul and everything, for [her] sakeâ (1038), yet he quickly turns against her calling her a wretched woman, a criminal, unprincipled, untrustworthy of raising her children, incapable, etc. His hypocrisy is clearly revealed when as soon as he realizes that Nora's mistake won't affect his reputation he forgives her (1039-1949). There's a saying that goes something like a good friend is hard to find, specially during difficult times; Tolvard was nor a good friend neither that perfect husband he seemed to be. He loved to have control of his wife's life, and his conversations usually tend to imply that Nora would be lost without him; that she needed his guidance and teaching. Tolvard did not love Nora, â[he] thought it fun to be in love with [her]â (1041).

Mrs. Linde is one of Nora's old friends from school. She gave up her true love for money, but in the end things did not turn out the way she had expected. Her husband died leaving her in a terrible financial situation making it necessary for her to work in order to sustain her mother and brothers. After her mother passed away and her brothers did not need her help she left town. Not to have someone to take care of made her feel âcompletely alone in the worldâ, and it frightened her âto be so empty and lostâ (1032). She needed âsomeone to take care ofâ, she wanted to be a mother and wanted the companionship of a husband. In the end, she was supposed to have helped Nora hide her secret. She could have convinced Mr. Krogstad to get the letter back, but she did not intercede (1033). She might have been envious of Nora, after all, Nora had all she was longing for; a husband, beautiful children, and a good life.

Works Cited

"A Doll's House." Triton College. 21 Feb. 2008 <http://academics.triton.edu/uc/files/dollshse.html>.

Hyder, Willian. "A Doll's House is No Toy Effort." Baltimore Sun. 15 Feb. 2008. 21 Feb. 2008 <http:// www.baltimoresun.com/news/local/howard/bal-ho.chesapeake15feb15,0,4775242.story>.

Ibsen, Henrik. "A Doll House." The Norton Introduction to Literature. New York: Norton & Co., 2006. 993-1045.

Re: Please help me with proofreading this essay

julielai — Fri, 06 Oct 2006 05:02:39 GMT

Just the first two paragraphs:

In Indian culture marriage is a process that is decided on by the parents. The parents look for an individual that has a good reputation, well educated (parallel), amount of money and many other factors. The children believe the parents are wiser and would make a better decision choosing their partner for them, rather then them doing it themselves. The way marriage is in my family is similar to the Indians except, the parents arenât the ones who choose.

In Indian culture the marriage partner is chosen based solely on what the parents think. The child meets the person once and they talk for some time. This is after the person has already been chosen to be their marriage partner. They are forced into living with this person for their entire life most likely after one conversation. This differs greatly in my family. In my family the person getting married usually dated (tense) the person they are planning on marrying for a while (marrying for a while or planning for a while). They (All the they's are confusing) would have to be accepted by the family and comfortable with everyone (unclear? Who? what?). The parents of both the people planning on getting married would have to have a good relationship, otherwise the marriage isnât happening.

Please help me with proofreading this essay

Anonymous — Tue, 03 Oct 2006 22:26:25 GMT

Hi this is my first time posting, i have a problem writing run on sentences i proofread this 3 times already if you guys could please help me out i would appreciate it please tell me if u like it and any corrections to plz:

In Indian culture marriage is a process that is decided on by the parents. The parents look for an individual that has a good reputation, well educated, amount of money and many other factors. The children believe the parents are wiser and would make a better decision choosing their partner for them, rather then them doing it themselves. The way marriage is in my family is similar to the Indians except, the parents arenât the ones who choose.

In Indian culture the marriage partner is chosen based solely on what the parents think. The child meets the person once and they talk for some time. This is after the person has already been chosen to be their marriage partner. They are forced into living with this person for their entire life most likely after one conversation. This differs greatly in my family. In my family the person getting married usually dated the person they are planning on marrying for a while. They would have to be accepted by the family and comfortable with everyone. The parents of both the people planning on getting married would have to have a good relationship, otherwise the marriage isnât happening.

The Indian parents look for someone who has a good reputation. If they are looking for a husband for their daughter, a man with money is essential because that is a sign that he could take good care of her. In my family, reputation isnât much of a problem. Unless the person is known for doing something drastic such as being a murderer or a thief. Most males in my family look for someone who is on the same level financially as them. They donât want to be supported by the woman, both partners must play their role.

Indian parents donât only look for materialistic things, they try to find someone who has nice physical features, tall, light skin, no glasses etc.. This may sound fair at first but, what if the parent and the child have different preferences in people? In my family the parents donât view the person's physical appearance, they care more about the personality. Personality is very important to parents in my family because from ones personality you can almost tell what they are about. They want someone who isnât afraid to speak their mind and show independence.

In Indian culture If a women is seen on the bus or on the street, that isnât a good quality. In my family that wouldnât be a problem because the husband isnât expected to do every thing outside the house and the women isnât expected to do everything inside the house. If a women doesnât have a job during a marriage she is considered lazy or to dependent which isnât a good way to be known in my family; but if a women is out all the time the family may begin to think she is doing something else such as cheating.

Although in my family the parents donât choose the person to marry their child with, their opinions and advice is very essential part of the person the child marries. If the parent doesnât like the person then the child most likely wonât get married to that person. In the end the child is the one who chooses who they are marrying, the parent is just their to support them during their choosing. Parents donât want their children making a rash decision on such a big event like marriage. It is to be taken seriously, that is why they are so concerned with the choices the child makes.

Need a lot of proofreading: Compare and Contrast of the Glass Menagerie

jubaitca — Fri, 21 Jan 2005 20:14:17 GMT

Hello,

I have an essay that I completed. But when my teacher saw it, she said that some parts didn't mkae sense. Including the thesis, and the reasoning and especially the conclusion (because she said it wasn't connected to the main essay or my thsesis statement), and also there was some editing needed. Can someone please have a look at it:

In the play, The Glass Menagerie, Tennessee Williams reveals two extraordinary characters, Tom and Laura, in the most unique and curious manner. Although Tom is a character who exists outside and inside the play's action at the same time, his role is most significant when he plays in the story. Laura, however, is a more coincidental character, who is so fragile that she can hardly function in the real world. Laura frequently escapes to a private, imaginary world occupied by fragile glass animals. Tom on the other hand, gives an expression of being a wanderer â someone who seeks adventure and who wants to escape reality because of his family. Overall, Tom and Laura manifest on their differences in respond to Amanda, their mother.

Amanda as the mother plays a major role revealing the characteristics of Tom and Laura. ââ¦And chew-chew!â and Tom replies, ââ¦I havenât enjoyed one bit of this dinner because of your constant directions on how to eat it.â (Scene 1) This is only one of the situations where Tom illustrates his short-temper and resentment towards Amanda. This constant nagging of Amanda is the chief reason why Tom leaves to go to the movies and escape the painful reality. This is more clearly seen when Tom says to her mother "The more you shout about my selfishness to me the quicker I'll go, and I won't go to the movies!" (scene 7) Tom has made his intention clear and he is now going to leave the family even though one would argue that it is a lame excuse to betray a family forever. Laura, on the other hand, is polite and more acts more maturely (well-behaved) to her mother. This behaviour can be seen in Scene 1 where Laura does most of the work when bringing and taking out the dishes following her motherâs instructions. From this, we can conclude that both the brother and sister have opposite reactions towards their mother even though they are able to interact with each other comfortably.
Secondly, both Tom and Lauraâs characteristics in the family are also different, Laura being the innocent one, and Tom, the guilty one. In spite of her fragility, Laura is the most serene member of her family. She leaves the worrying to Amanda and Tom. In her innocence, Laura doesn't realize how Tom and Amanda bleed for her. In contrast, Tom is thought to be selfish by not taking any responsibility for his sisterâs marriage. This is clear when in the last scene, Amanda furiously regards Tom as, ââ¦ selfish dreamer!â (scene 7)Another example of his selfishness, is shown when Jim is over and Tom says "I paid my dues this month, instead of the light bill" (scene 7). At this point, Tom becomes a more selfish character. There is less sympathy given in his direction. Thus, this is probably when the reader would feel sorry for Amanda who is left with Lauraâs innocence and Tomâs selfishness.

Lastly, on a different note, both Laura and Tom share the same characteristics of being dreamers and of living in a make-believe world that leads them to their tragic ending. The cause for Lauraâs inability to cope with reality is because of her hypersensitivity. âShe is washing and polishing her collection of glass.â (scene 2) She spends all of her time in a world of glass ornaments in the apartment. Even though she tries several times to participate in the outside world (when she is gone into a relationship with Jim from her perspective), she is too fragile. âI went in the art museum and the bird houses at the zooâ¦â (Scene 2) (says Laura) is another instance where it proves that she is a wanderer - allowing her to remain within herself in her own world (in this case not going to the business college). Similarly, Tom seeks his own world of going to the movies at night and wishing to live the adventures he sees in the movies. Watching someone else's adventures on the movie screen offers Tom another diversion from his own lifeless existence. But, since he has to come out of the dark theater and face life again, escaping to the movies solves no problems. Therefore, he realizes his dream (of going to the navy) of following his fatherâs footsteps. However, "Oh, Laura, Laura," he says in the play's final speech, "I tried to leave you behind me, but I am more faithful than I intended to be!" (scene 7) These lines can give you the impression that Tom regrets being a wanderer.

In conclusion, as their characteristics are revealed to the readers, both Tom and Laura play a major part in this tragic play. Tom is revealed as more of a sympathetic person to the readers. This is because he is always blamed for things that canât be blamed towards him, one could argue that it is just fate that is the cause. In addition, you have Lauraâs innocence in the play that causes a lot of trouble for Tom. However, for their difference, they do share similarities where they are both dreamers and wanderers. One might think of Tom as a representative of a whole generation of young people coming of age just as the world is exploding into war. Tom's story, then, may be both personal and generally symbolic of life at a bleak time in our history. It can be read either way.

Thanks
Thanks you very much