I work for an online editing and proofreading service. See my profile for more info. Your essay is too long for me to edit here, but I will show you how I would revise the first paragraph. When I was younger I was always an outsider among other

I am part of an online editing and proofreading service. For more info on this service, please see my profile. Here is my revision of your first two paragraphs (which I would combine into one) I am a 4th Semester business administration student at

Hello: Nothing is technically wrong with your sentences, but your passage would read better as: "How are celebrity moms able to look so good just a few months after childbirth? Flipping through the tabloids, mothers who aren't famous