this is not a question but it may give hope

i am a 21 year old male and im srry it may not be my place and many may think i am to inexpireanced in love to no what it is but i give u this as proof...
in my short life i have found that love and passion are to differnt things that coinside and can but should not be without the other. if they do it will not last the chemistry also has a big part in it... u can love some one and have no feelings for them has happened for me as wells as unreciprcated love if u have 1 without the other its foolish to hope in a happy ending... including marrige...

now to the point ....

if ur a woman and love ur husband but u are in love with another man and ur marrige seems to stall out u have 2 options u can follow ur heart and be with the man u are passionatly in love with if the love is recipricated.... and selfishness is not a sin wanting to be loved andnot just be loved (if u understand) is ok ... but u will have to overcome ur fears of hurting others in the end its not what others think its weather or not u think uve done what right for urself

to tell the truth on the other end of the situation...

i am passionatly in love with a woman who loves me but she also loves the mans shes with and does not want to hurt him but if she does not come to relize that she has to do whats best for her she will only put herself through more pain and nomatter what her choice i am there for her weather she choose him me or niether but i cant seem to get that acrross to her...but then my jealousy many times clouds my vision... and its is more than just attration and lust i cant tell u what it is it just is... as another so elequently put it ..." its like a drug that i dont want to quit one that no matter how hard it is tostay away from it keeps pulling me back... the worst part is shes my best friend and my my friends girl friend ....

now back to topic...

the second option is...

to remain in the relationship ur in altough u no the feelings for the other will never go away no matter how hard u try... u stick it out and hope for better times

essintialy it has nothing to do with how u were raised its weather or not u have the courage to face all odds stacked against u and fight for the kind of love u deserve...or fall into the humman line and suffer hoping ithat it will go away

and that is all i have to say for now...

and plz if uthink u can help me with my problem speak up i could use the help im falling apart at the seems and losing all hope ..


TK the giant
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Unfortunately no one can help you. If she loves you, she'll be with you no matter what. If she hesitates, probably she has a reason for that. You are addicted to that woman, so you can do the following: 1. relax and have fun, you two are happy together;
2. give her time to take a decision ( a month, for instance) and if she doesn't leave her boyfriend to be with you, be strong and leave her. You are young and you'll find your true love. True love should bring happiness not torment (trust me) . Lie will destroy you from within.
Wish you luck.
Nicely said Malinka
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I am in the same obstacle. This really helps. The girl who had been with me is so understanding and sweet that the reason for her to break up with me is because she knew she thought about her former bf when she was with me. Well, what she had told me might not be neccessary true, since it could simply be some kind of excuse use to get rid of me, but I would like to have a good memory for my first date and my first gf. Well, guess 15 is too young for love.
Maybe my culture and tradition is different from you to tell you the solution, but I would like to give a story which happened around my society that was somewhat similar to you. There was a girl who had a relationship with a man, she loves him so much and she wants to only marry him. However, another man came to her family and asked for a permission to engage their daughter. The girl became anxious and she phoned her beloved and told him to come to her family and marry her; because there is another man who came. Nevertheless, her beloved was careless about the matter and was hesitated to come to her family. Because of the stress and pressure this girl got from her family of a reason of not marrying the man who came, she should accept him or they will think she is in a relation with another one. She is from a conservative family and it would be a trouble for her if they knew about her relationship. So, the girl married the man, the girl was beautiful but the problems occurred at the first night, when her husband wanted to touch her, she screamed, cried and begged him not to do it. Then, her husband became shocked and asked her for the reason; she told him the whole story about her relationship with another man and about her love. At that time, her husband became disappointed and depressed and he took his bed and slept in the sitting room. He relieved her that he will divorce her but because he is nobleman, he said that he won’t divorce her tomorrow because he don’t want that her family to be sad that he sent their daughter the second day after marriage, he told her that he is now like her brother and after few days, he will divorce her just for the considerateness of the feelings of her family. During this period, the husband treated the girl like his sister, but the girl felt that she misjudged him and she started to put make-up and wear beautiful clothes in front of him to attract him, and she kept smiling and asking him about his opinion of her appearance, but the man didn’t react to her. The man kept her promise and he divorced the girl, then the girl phoned her beloved and told him that she divorced from her husband and insisted that he came to marry her, unfortunately, her beloved said to her words which meant that he wasn’t sure whether he would marry her or no. Finally, the girl felt regretted of what she did with her husband and wished that she hadn’t divorced.

My opinion is, what would be your feelings if you want to engage someone and he/she is telling you that he/she is loving another person, will you marry him/her, I’m sure that you’ll think before you do it, because the purpose of marriage is to have the independent relaxing and peaceful life with a partner who will you share your life and your soul with her/him, our hearts should be one and what makes you sad or happy, makes your partner sad or happy too. If you would like to know my feelings if my husband will tell me one day that he loves another girl, my answer will be “divorce me right now, why did you marry me if your heart is not with me, why did you cheat me” even if I would continue with this person, my relationship with him will not be strong and easy to break up.

I am in a simular situation. About two years ago I met a guy that was married (which I understand was wrong of me!) I fell madly in love with him but because his wife was pregnant with their second child I made him go home to her. He had left her for about 2 weeks before I decided to make him go home. It crushed me. Still, I couldnt stay from here so when he called, of course, I was there. I tried everything in my power to get him to leave her after she had the baby but he wouldnt. I had proof that she was running around on him way before he ever started seeing me and he still wouldn't leave her. He claimed that he didnt love her but he had to be there for his kids. I was crushed and kept telling him that I would give up eventually and move on and when I did I would never have him back. Well, I gave up and now I have found the most wonderful guy ever! He is in the United States AirForce and is now deployed in Iraq! I love him! BUT....At the same time the married guy is now devorced and out to tell me how much he loves and needs me. I am stuck between two guys and neither of them know it. He knows that I am with someone but he doesnt know that I still love him also and sometimes wish that I could be with him. Is it a sin to love two people at one time? I don't want to hurt anyone buy this. I really don't. I need help deciding what I want. When I think about leaving the guy that I am dating(suppose to be married to when he gets home next year) my stomach feels like it comes up my throat. Is that a sign that I should stay with him because he is truely who I want? Help Please!
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Really a hard situation you are in ...
Either you will get one man or neither of them, the bad thing is , that you are going to hurt one , and there's no escape.

I would think for a really long time , and then decide which guy is better for me , just follow your heart , you'll pick the right decision , good luck Emotion: smile
i am in exactly the same position as you are in. i am in love with a two men and cannot let go of either. wow! what a mess
I can't realy imagine how one can love two persons at the same time.. but it seems to be possible.
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