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Some individuals hold a firm belief that the various types of advertisements have become increasingly on a regular basis, thus exerting a beneficial effect on people's life. Although, I believe that this argument is feasible to a certain extent, personally, there are other debilitating impacts on different social entities.
On the one hand, there is no question that advertising has brought with it a number of benefits to entrepreneurs and viewers. The initial merit is a prosperous achievement for the companies. Providing that organization, which engages in the competitive commercial market, allocate a massive amount of financial resources for TV adverts regarding their commodities, Hordes of customers would are attracted and well-informed the details of the products, which facilitates the generation of higher profit. Another advantage worth mentioning is that the communities would have a more thorough understanding involving educational values from subliminal messages conveyed by firms and producers as well. For instance, the Coca-cola foundation makes use of publicity materials to create several commercials containing messages about the role that the family gathering plays on the Tet holiday in the nation of Viet Nam; therefore, the residents are encouraged to reunite with their parents and relatives in the significant occasion
Nevertheless, the rapid boom of the advertising industry presents various disadvantages on the societal level. To begin with, the entrepreneurs tend to take advantage of billboards and posters to distort and exaggerate the reality of their goods, which causes disorientation for clients. In this spectrum, the customers are served as a waste of time and monetary sources for purchasing the items due to overload information. Furthermore, the children and pupils are likely to imitate negative behaviors and verbal messages via Many forms of inappropriate advertising on the condition that they have access to violence and sexual theme on product promotions and thereby sparks adverse influences on their personality development.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that commercial groups and citizens benefit from the proliferation of varied programs from TV ads. However, I feel that the advertisement renders detrimental consequences.


THANKS FOR YOUR READING

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Subject: Please review my IELTS essay

Message body:
Topic:

Advertising is becoming more and more common in everyday life. Some people say that advertising has a positive impact on our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?


My essay:

(Your text here...)
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You wrote nearly 350 words.

The minimum is 250. You will not lose points for writing more; however, longer essays generally do not get high scores. There are many reasons.

First, the longer the essay, the more chances you have to make errors, and you will lose points for each of those errors.

Second, your writing may be repetitious and wordy. This will cost you points in task completion or coherence and cohesion.

Third, you will likely stray off-topic, and examiners will deduct points if you are not focused on the topic. You will also be tempted to use weak or unsound arguments or even contradict yourself. Develop just two or three argument points with examples.

Fourth, you will take a lot of time writing, and not have time left over to proofread your essay. You will miss the silly mistakes, and that lowers your score.


Fifth, you will not have enough time to spend on Task 1, and get a lower score there.

Aim to write around 270 words for Task 2. Practice writing a lot of essays so you get a feeling for the length.


Your essay is excessively wordy, so you can remove a lot of unnecessary text to get to a reasonable length.


Some individuals hold a firm belief that the various types of advertisements have become increasingly (ungrammatical. You can write "increasingly common" or "have been increasing") on a regular basis, thus exerting a beneficial effect on people's life. (wrong form) lives. Although, (wrong punctuation) I believe that this argument is feasible to a certain extent, personally, there are other debilitating (wrong word) negative impacts on different social entities.(That makes no sense. What is a "social entity?")

On the one hand, there is no question that advertising has brought with it a number of benefits to entrepreneurs and viewers. The initial merit is a prosperous achievement (wrong word) prosperity for the companies. Providing that organization, (ungrammatical) If an organization which engages in the competitive commercial market allocates a massive large amount of money to financial resources for TV adverts regarding their commodities, (wrong word. A commodity is a bulk raw material or precious metal sold on the commodities market. For example, barrels of oil, tons of wheat and bales of cotton.) Hordes (wrong word, worn capitalization) of customers would are attracted and well-informed about the details of the products, which facilitates the generation of generates higher profits. Another advantage worth mentioning is that the communities would benefit from the happy and positive messages in the advertising. have a more thorough understanding involving educational values from subliminal messages conveyed by firms and producers (I don't know what you mean.) as well. For instance, the Coca-Cola foundation makes use of publicity materials to creates several commercials containing messages about the role that the family gathering plays on the Tet holiday in the nation of Viet Nam; therefore, the residents are encouraged to reunite with their parents and relatives for this in the significant occasion (missing punctuation)


Nevertheless, the rapid boom of the advertising industry has had some presents various disadvantages on the society. al level. To begin with, the advertisers entrepreneurs tend to take advantage of billboards and posters to distort and exaggerate the qualities reality of their goods, which deceives potential buyers. causes disorientation (wrong word ) for clients.(wrong word) In this spectrum, (wrong word) the customers are served as a waste of time and money monetary sources for purchasing the items due to overload (wrong word) misinformation. Furthermore, the children and pupils (wrong word) are likely to imitate negative behaviors and verbal messages exhibited in via Many forms of inappropriate advertising that was designed for a mature, adult audience. .(There are many errors in this awkward sentence. It really makes no sense. ) on the condition that they have access to violence and sexual theme on product promotions and thereby sparks adverse influences on their personality development.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that companies and consumers do commercial groups and citizens benefit from the proliferation of varied programs from TV ads. (It is not just TV ads) However, I feel that the some advertisements are deceptive and inappropriate for a younger audience and can have renders detrimental consequences.