Hi everyone,

I just started m English courses 2 months ago. Could you help me and give feedback?

Does it flow? Could you understood me?

PUBLIC TRANSPORT SHOULD BE FREE FOR EVERYONE IN ADELAIDE
According to the Royal Automobile Association, Adelaide once had the reputation as Australia’s “20- minute city” because 20 minutes were enough to access the city centre from all parts of the urban area. Today, its peak hour traffic congestion caused by a high private vehicle ownership rate puts Adelaide is in the unenviable position of the worst of any Australian capital city (Austroads, 2007). Many argue that solely free public transport may solve the traffic flow problem in Adelaide. However, introducing absolutely free public transport would result in a massive overloading of the whole public transport system and road network, to the extent that it might collapse altogether. This essay will consider the necessity of free public transport and will discuss that it is better to improve public transport services rather than making it free.It has been argued that free public transport may be the best way of reducing congestion on city’s increasingly car-clogged roads (Fisher). This could be a valid point since free public transport encourages Adelaideans leave their cars at home and use public transport. However, boost in public transport patronage will require a public transport extension. Currently, 89% of Adelaide Metro public transport system consists of buses and most of the suburbs are connected by buses (Adelaide Metro, 2008). Thus, a demanded public transport extension will increase the amount of buses, which in turns will increase a pressure on bus system. According to Sam Powrie, the deputy char of Bicycle Institute of South Australia, it is doubtable that Adelaide will ever afford required bus system to entirely serve distances over Adelaide’s 90km by 30km sprawl footprint (2008). So it is clear that such inadequate public transportation turning numbers of people to private automobiles. Therefore, at the present and in the course of some years it would be better to improve public transport system integrated with an advanced road and railway network instead of making it free.It could be contended that by using a free public transport the commuters may save money on transportation expenses. While this may be true in some cases, the Government would be forced to increase other taxes to afford free public transport and employ a staff that is needed for passengers' assistance and security. This means that increased usage frequency of public transport would cost more to taxpayers. Professor Fisher (The Age 2006) in his recent work on public transport said that free public transport would cost $340 million per year for Melbourne. Meanwhile, the State's public transport improvement and road infrastructure budget for 2007- 2010 is just $542 million (Castello, Nakervis & Novak 2007). Logically, it is better to invest additional $340 million per year to improve services and public transport in Adelaide. Also, Corolan, the executive chief of Metlink, said, "The evidence is people are more sensitive to those improvements than they are to price. If we made it free, we would have less money to invest in the system, whereas what we really need is more money to invest" (cited in Brimbauer 2006). In other words, people would use public transport on which they can rely and where they feel themselves comfortable. They will know that paid money is being invested in public transport. Furthermore, more passengers more fares collected, public transport system would investment its revenue in a high- standard road network and extensive public transport service. So, it would be more beneficial to have reasonably priced public transport.Overall, free public transport is not the only solution for current situation in Adelaide. Adelaide's whole public transport system requires a development. Sustainable and organised public transport would attract more people rather than unreliable and free public transport. As a result, improved public transport with reasonable ticketing prices could defray its own expenses. Also, it could encourage people to leave their cars at home, which in turns, would significantly reduce congestion in Adelaide's streets.
Hi,

First, you need to organize your thoughts into several paragraphs. This helps the reader to understand the way you are thinking about the topic, and to easily see the various points that you are making. Nobody really wants to read one huge paragraph.

So, please change this and repost.

Bets wishes, CliveEmotion: smile
Thank you!