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Ohhh, I got to say this, about you told Nikki about the me asking out out, it really upset me a little bit, because from the point of my view, I usually kept thing to myself. Now she knows it, so does all your friends. I guess sometime that I got to pay a small price, but I don't think I paid any at all because I probably never would meet you again. Even if we do, I don't actually rememeber you. You know that time fade away every image you got in your head.

Are they correct?

Thank you
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Nice try at realistic dialogue.

about the me asking out out - I think you've got yourself jumbled up here or typos?

the point of my view - incorrect. From my point of view

kept things or keep things

so do all your friends

I had to pay a price (past) or I will have to pay a price (future)...this sentence is quite confusing tense-wise - I'm not sure it it has all happened yet or not.. will never not would never.

if we do what? meet? I won't remember you (don't for present. won't for future).

Time fades
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>I am so exciting that you are helping me right now!

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Thank you very much NOna,

I am so exciting that you are helping me right now!

how about my new revision?

Ohhh, I got to say this, about you told Nikki about me asking you out, it really upset me a little bit, because from my point of view, I usually keep things to myself. Now she knows it, so do all your friends. I guess sometime that I have to pay a small price, but I don't think I'll pay any at all this time because I probably will not meet you again. Even if we do meet, I will not actually rememeber you. You know that time fade away every image you got in your head. What is more, I don't even have your pic to cherishing!
 Marius Hancu's reply was promoted to an answer.
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