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This is my writing just for practising to improve my writing skill. So there is no limited word as resquested. Could you help me correct the content, grammar, ect, please? Thank you very much.

The topic is: "Imagine that you are the sole survivor of a ship-wreck"


Imagine that you are the sole survivor of a ship-wreck

I will forever remember that day - the day that has swept all of my friends away from me.

It was a gloomy day, I wake up in the morning and having a cup of coffee as usual. The sky was covered up with plenty of dark clouds and heavy raindrops, birds were soaked in boredom that they barely sang. I kept my eyes on the clock for no reason and sighed. Today was my birthday and nobody came, they did not even send me a message. Suddenly, my phone rang, it was Danny on the other side: “ Hey! Go to the dock for surprises”. The word ‘surprises’ made me skeptical. I grabbed my key and drove to the dock as soon as possible. When I got there, they had stood there with a crew ship! They had planned a party in a crew ship for me. I ran towards everyone and hugged them: “You guys are the best”. Wait no more, we jumped on the ship and started the journey. But the disaster had just begun…
As we got up on the ship, Danny guided us to every single room and told us that we would be here for one night. So excited were we that we started drinking and dancing from dusk till dawn. After the party, we gathered around and talked, out from nowhere Danny ran down from the main room and shouted: “Our ship has crashed something!”. The room was snowed under with silence. Then everybody cracked out loud, they thought he was kidding. But when I looked at Danny’s pale face, I knew there was something wrong happened. I ran down to the basement with Danny and I was completely shocked. The water level in the basement was filled up to my knee. I sprinted up stair again to warned everybody about the problem. I knew it was not a good day, it was horrible. Everybody was in a panic, some even lost control and ran around like a headless chicken. Although Danny tried to call the police, there was no signal in this enormous ocean. We desperately sent help with everything we could use and the scariest night had passed, leaving fear among us. Sunrise was as red as blood, we could not close our eyes even though we were all tired. We knew that if we took a nap now, it would be our last nap. Then, someone raised their phone and said that they had the signal, Danny took their phone and called 911 instantly. Things got worse when they said they going to put Danny to jail if he kept joking. So angry was Danny that he smashed the phone, screamed out loud, and cried. That was our last chance of surviving, we could not help but laugh in despondent. We had used all the food in the storage and the ship had sunk halfway. Some jumped down and swam back to the city but it was the most stupid idea that they ever made in their life. Others were waiting to die. Day two past and we still had not contacted the rescuer. All of sudden, the ship sank completely into the ocean, I closed my eyes to the death. Luckily, my shirt was trapped in the wood plank and I was only the one to survive that. I tried to collect all the wood plank from the ship, built it up like a box and it worked like a charm. After a while, I began to lose consciousness since the water was too cold to survive. I finally gave up and said in my mind: “it is time to rest”, and then closed my eyes.

When I woke up, I noticed that I was lying on the bed. I saw my family standing next to me and they were happy when they realized that I had woken up. The rescuer arrived on time and they saved me as soon as I drowned in the ocean. I was lucky to be alive.

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Thuy ChungImagine that you are the sole survivor of a ship-wreck

Shipwreck is one word.


Your paragraphs are not balanced.

You have a couple of very short paragraphs and a very very long one.

Learn about the art of paragraph writing.

You make a lot of comma splice errors.



I will forever remember that day - the day when that has swept all of my friends were swept away from me. (That verb is not correct for the story.)

It was a gloomy day, (comma splice error. It is a very common mistake. Learn to avoid these punctuation and sentence structure errors. https://www.chompchomp.com/terms/commasplice.htm ) I wake (wrong tense. You are writing about the past.) up in the morning and having (wrong verb form.) a cup of coffee as usual. The sky was covered up with plenty of dark clouds and heavy raindrops, (wrong expression. The sky cannot be covered with raindrops.) birds were soaked in boredom (wrong expression. ) that they barely sang. I kept my eyes on the clock for no reason and sighed. Today was my birthday and nobody came, (comma splice error) they did not even send me a message. Suddenly, my phone rang, (comma splice error) it was Danny on the other side: “ Hey! Go to the dock for a surprise. surprises”. The word ‘surprises’ made me skeptical. I grabbed my key and drove to the dock as soon as possible. When I got there, they had stood there with a crew ship! They had planned a party on in a crew (wrong word. The crew are the people who operate the ship.) ship for me. I ran towards everyone and hugged them: “You guys are the best”. Wait no more, (comma splice error) we jumped on the ship and started the journey. But the disaster had just begun… (Really? You have not mentioned anything onerous so far in your story.)
As we got up on the ship, Danny guided us to every single room and told us that we would be here for one night. So excited were we that we started drinking and dancing (If you start something, it is only one point in time.) from dusk till dawn. After the party, we gathered around and talked, (comma splice error) out from nowhere Danny ran down from the main room deck and shouted: “Our ship has crashed struck something!”. The room was snowed under (wrong expression) with silence. Then everybody cracked (wrong word) out loud, (comma splice error) they thought he was kidding. But when I looked at Danny’s pale face, I knew there was something wrong happened. I ran down to the basement (wrong word. Ships do not have basements.) with Danny and I was completely shocked. The water level in the basement was filled up to my knee. (Do you have only one leg?) I sprinted up stair again to warned everybody about the problem. I knew it was not a good day, (comma splice error) it was horrible. Everybody was in a panic, (comma splice error) some even lost control and ran around like a headless chickens. Although Danny tried to call the police, there was no cell phone signal because we were too far off shore. in this enormous ocean. We desperately sent help with everything we could use and the scariest night had passed, leaving fear among us. Sunrise was as red as blood, (comma splice error) we could not close our eyes even though we were all tired. We knew that if we took a nap now, it would be our last nap. Then, someone raised their phone and said that they had the a signal, (comma splice error) Danny took their phone and called 911 instantly. Things got worse when they said they going to put (wrong verb form) Danny to jail if he kept joking. So angry was Danny that he smashed the phone, screamed out loud, and cried. That was our last chance of surviving, (comma splice error) we could not help but laugh in despondent. (wrong word. Despondent is an adjective.) We had used all the food in the storage and the ship had sunk halfway. Some jumped down into the water and swam back to the city (That means that they survived because they reached land.) but it was the most stupid idea that they ever made in their life. Others were waiting to die. Day two past (Past is an adjective.) and we still had not contacted the rescuer. All of sudden, the ship sank completely into the ocean, (comma splice error ) I closed my eyes to the death. Luckily, my shirt was trapped in the wood plank and I was only the one to survive that. I tried to collect all the wood plank (Was there only one of these?) from the ship, (comma splice error ) built it up like a box and it worked like a charm. After a while, I began to lose consciousness since the water was too cold to survive. I finally gave up and said in my mind: “it is time to rest”, and then closed my eyes.

When I woke up, I noticed that I was lying on my the bed. I saw my family standing next to me and they were happy when they realized that I had woken up. The rescuer arrived on time and they saved me as soon as I drowned (When you drown, you are dead. ) in the ocean. I was lucky to be alive.

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I am really highly appreciated your help. Thank you very much.

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