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yesterday i drew up the water near head of the temple
my shirt left out on the lotus
if you saw, give me again
or you keep it as your memorable thing
my shirt was worn out on the lines
... but i have no wife, my mother hasnot done yet
my shirt has been worn out so long
tomorrow i will borrow her to do it for me
i will pay for your labour when you did it
until you get married , i will help you again
help you one basket of sticky
one good pig, one bottle of wine


........

can you check the grammar and the right word in my writting?

because there are some words in ambiguity that mean you can't understand about my ideas.

and after reading it, you can help me fix it in the best way!

thanks for your view!
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Hi,

yesterday i drew up the water near head of the temple
my shirt left out on the lotus
if you saw, give me again
or you keep it as your memorable thing
my shirt was worn out on the lines
... but i have no wife, my mother hasnot done yet
my shirt has been worn out so long
tomorrow i will borrow her to do it for me
i will pay for your labour when you did it
until you get married , i will help you again
help you one basket of sticky
one good pig, one bottle of wine


Your poem is nice. It has charm. Thank you for posting it.

It has some problems, but I don't want to list them all because it will spoil the charm.

Here are a few comments.

Use a capital I when you talk about yourself.

Is there another word you can use for your garment instead of 'shirt'?

Can you say 'borrow her' another way?

What is 'sticky'? It's not the right word.

Clive
Comments  
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
yesterday I drew up the water near head of the temple
My coat left out on the lotus
If you saw, give me again
Or you hold It as your memorable thing
My coat was worn out on the lines
... but I have no wife, my mother hasnot done yet
My coat has been worn out so long
Tomorrow I will bring her over to my home

so that she can do it for me
I will pay for your labour when you did it
Until you get married , I will help you again
Help you one basket of sticky rice
One good pig, One bottle of wine

....
is it better ? i changed a little on using some words
Hi,

Yes, better, and it still has charm..
Here are a few other small suggestions.

Add some more punctuation.

Yesterday I drew up the water near the head of the temple
My coat left out on the lotus
If you saw, give me again
Or you hold it as your memorable thing
My coat was worn out on the lines What does 'on the lines' mean?
... but I have no wife, my mother has not done yet
My coat has been worn out so long
Tomorrow I will bring her over to my home

so that she can do it for me
I will pay for your labour when you did it
'do', not 'did'.
Until you get married , I will help you again
Help you with one basket of sticky rice
One good pig, One bottle of wine

....
Clive