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Hi

I have a sentence: He never charged them extreme interest on loans nor did he pay extreme interest.

I'd like to understand:

1. Is the choice of words in the above sentence correct?

2. If I replace the first 'extreme' with the words 'unreasonably high', then how do I change the second 'extreme'? Do I use the word 'likewise'?

Please help.


Thank you.

Comments  

You can consider this:

He neither charged them nor payed them an unreasonably high interest.

writingtosms1. Is the choice of words in the above sentence correct?

It seems OK to me, but most people understand "exorbitant" with "interest", which makes the first "extreme" look like you don't know the other word. There are also "excessive", which is probably best because it would go in both places, and "usurious" for the first one, which is scholarly or lawerly.

writingtosms2. If I replace the first 'extreme' with the words 'unreasonably high', then how do I change the second 'extreme'? Do I use the word 'likewise'?

I can't fit "likewise" in there, so I don't know what your sentence would look like. I might make it "He never charged them unreasonably high interest on loans, nor did he pay it when he borrowed." You needed a comma.

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writingtosms1. Is the choice of words in the above sentence correct?

It's correct but not great.

writingtosms2. If I replace the first 'extreme' with the words 'unreasonably high', then how do I change the second 'extreme'?

Good question. 'unreasonable' doesn't work when the money is going in the other direction.

writingtosmsDo I use the word 'likewise'?

As in "pay likewise interest"? No, you can't do that.

I think the sentence needs a little more to make the clauses parallel. You could do something like the following, I suppose.

He never charged them unreasonably high interest rates on loans, but then he never offered them particularly favorable interest rates on savings either.

However, it may be wordier than what you want.

CJ

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Thanks so much, CJ.

I truly like your choice of words, especially for the latter part of that sentence.

But since that original sentence is part of someone else's documentation, he wouldn't me want to change his entire sentence. So I've edited my sentence as follows:

He never charged them excessive interest on loans, nor did he pay interest likewise, for loans lent to him.

Is this sentence grammatically OK?

And would it be at least a bit better than the original one?

Please help.


Thank you, and sorry for the trouble.

The use of 'likewise' is very awkward there. I would omit it. Also, no comma, please.

If you want 'likewise', it works like this:

He never charged them excessive interest on loans; likewise, he did not pay excessive interest on loans he took out for himself.

CJ

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