Let's say a friend of yours made a mistake and you and her friends want to tell her what she did was wrong but you don't want to risk your friendship.

How do you describe the dilemma? We feel ___ . /We are hesistating __?

Thanks in advance.
There are probably many answers. I don't know how closely these correspond to your intention, but others will undoubtedly offer more suggestions.
We feel torn. We feel torn between telling her and not telling her. We feel ambivalent.
We are uncertain how she'll take it if we tell her. We're hesitating (to tell her). It's hard to gauge her reaction. What if she takes it the wrong way?

Thanks for a few suggestions, CJ.