+1

Hi,

Could you check the following please?

"Most studies focused on teaching voice disorders used school teachers with their unique voice demands. University teaching faculty members are another group of PVU with typical voice demands (e.g., talking for prolonged periods of time, educating in settings with background noise, and often increasing their tone) and quite a different occupation status from teachers in school."


Thanks!

+2

"Most studies focused on teaching voice disorders used school teachers with their unique voice demands. University teaching faculty members are another group of PVU with typical voice demands (e.g., talking for prolonged periods of time, educating in settings with background noise, and often increasing their tone) and quite a different occupation status from teachers in school."

used school teachers The past tense used means you are talking about past studies. You could also say have studied or even study if you don't want to talk just about the past. I note that a little later you say members are another group, not members were another group. So think about your tenses.


educating in settings I'd say teaching in settings or even working in settings.


Do you mean their tone or do you mean their volume?


quite a different occupation status from teachers in school. What do you mean by occupation status? How does it relate to voice demands?

Clive

Comments  

Hi

That's perfectly OK - good paragraph

The only thing I'd say is, if you use an abbreviation you should ask yourself if all your audience will know what it stands for. I had to go off to google for a minute or two, to work out PVU (Professional Voice User).

If all your audience knows, it's not a problem, but it does no harm to put the meaning in brackets afterwards. Of course, you only have to do it the once, for the first usage.

Dave

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 Clive's reply was promoted to an answer.
CliveDo you mean their tone or do you mean their volume?

Strength and volume.

Clivequite a different occupation status from teachers in school. What do you mean by occupation status? How does it relate to voice demands?

I mean occupational situation. For example teaching in large rooms and to large audiences.

University teaching faculty members are another group of PVU with typical voice demands (e.g., talking for prolonged periods of time, educating in settings with background noise, and often increasing their tone) and quite a different occupation status from teachers in school."

increasing their tone I'd consider saying raising their volume or simply speaking louder.


occupation status I thought you were referring here to the importance of their job! I suggest you talk about workplace conditions, eg very large lecture rooms.

live

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Cliveincreasing their tone I'd consider saying raising their volume or simply speaking louder.

Is it impolite if I say "raising their voice"?

"Talking for prolonged periods of time, working in settings with background noise, and often raising their voice"


Thank you!

Yes, fine.