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Dear all,

Please see the following sentences. Here 1 and 2 are the sentences of a non-native English teacher. They are rewritten by me as 1a and 2b. I'd like to know whether they are correct. If incorrect, please correct them.

1) On the 24th anniversary of her demise, I remember the abundant love I received from Mary.

2) I realized the depth of the bond of love that existed between Tom and Mary.

1a) On the 24th death anniversary of Mary, I remember the abundance of love she showered on me.

2b) I realized the depth of love between Tom and Mary.



Comments  
cat navy 4251) On the 24th anniversary of her demise, I remember the abundant love I received from Mary.

OK, but "abundant" is a bit formal.

cat navy 4252) I realized the depth of the bond of love that existed between Tom and Mary.

No. A bond is not deep.

cat navy 4251a) On the 24th death anniversary of Mary, I remember the abundance of love she showered on me.

No. "Death anniversary" is not a useable collocation.

cat navy 4252b) I realized the depth of love between Tom and Mary.

No. The depth was not between them. "I realized the depth of the love between Tom and Mary."

Thanks a lot.