I'm a first year college student. Unlike other students, they have to move away from home and live and study independently. Finding out an ideal accommodation for yourself can be very difficult. It's so convinient because my school is near my house. The house is quite large and comfortable. It has 3 floors and a terrace roof. There is a garden between the garage and the house. My mother aslo make a terrace vegetable garden on the roof top. That makes the house more green. The house has enough room for our daily activities. There are 8 rooms in the house: one living room, one TV room, one kitchen, three bedrooms and two bathrooms. Despite living with my parents but I don't rely on them. I can take care of myself. The family support is a strong advantage to me, helps me alleviate difficulties, especially that freshman year.

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I'm a first year college student. Unlike other students, they (Who are "they"?) have to move away from home and live and study independently. (This sentence is a non-sequitur. It has no relation to your first sentence about your being a first-year student.) Finding out an ideal accommodation for yourself can be very difficult. It's so convinient because my school is near my house. (This sentence is another non-sequitur. What does your school being near your house have to do with the difficulties of finding an ideal place to live?)) The house is quite large and comfortable. It has 3 floors and a terrace roof. There is a garden between the garage and the house. My mother aslo make (wrong form, wrong word) a terrace vegetable garden on the roof top. That makes the house more green. The house has enough room for our daily activities. There are 8 eight rooms in the house: one living room, one TV room, one kitchen, three bedrooms and two bathrooms. Despite living with my parents but (But is a coordinating conjunction. Use it to join two main clauses. ) .I don't rely on them. I can take care of myself. The family support is a strong advantage for to me, (comma splice error, missing word) helps me alleviate difficulties, especially that in my freshman year.