I read so many articles and questions to aunt agony about sex in marriage. I see that all emotions put together including love is on one ground and good and consistent sex is placed on another ground and balanced in a marriage. Why is it so? Why can't a person just live on love and affection with sex just a part of life? Why is sex given so much of importance in marriage?
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Uhm, can't argue about the importance of sex in marriage. I think it's because human instinct to breed, to avoid extinction. So the brain gives some kind of signal that sex feels very good.

Yes, we are human and we have conscience thus most of us doing it based on love,affection and other deeper feelings, such feelings differs us from that of beast. But one cannot deny the importance of healthy sex in a healthy marriage, it just natural and almost instictually. Well some special (spritually strong) peoples would be able to live a marriage life with just affection and sex is not important, but that is a rare case. What do you think?
ABSOLUTLY! Happiness in a marriage depends on great sex (I hope I'm not being sexist) atleast until the woman no longer has the urge. In my experiences sex has always been the factor but if you have money, she will forgive you for the bad sex lol.
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I would say communication, complicity, affection are more important than sex in a long-lasting relationship. Why? Because it is dead easy to find someone to have sex but it is extremely difficult to find the rest, all of them, in one person. It wouldn't be difficult to imagine that you can find wonderful sex partners who are a total disaster in other departments. Do you see what I mean? Being a woman, one of the things I value most is affection, which combined with sex is hmmm. lovely.
you are right Maj. That's what differs man from a woman... For a woman Love is her whole existense whereas sex is part of her life. For a man love is part of life and Sex life is the real life. I don't say that sex is taboo or should be avoided but what I feel strongly is that it is not important as much as men tend to think.Love without sex is possoble but sex without love is just lust! Am I right?
It certainly should not depend exclusively on sex. After all, there are many couples who met after losing their previous husbands, wives and partners after many years together. Hence, it is perfectly possible for people to meet and marry without sex playing a part in it at all. Of course, many people value sex both within and without marriage yet there are, sadly, many couples whose relationship is suffering purely because one party makes excessive demands for sex of the other, particularly if that one party feels unfulfilled and/or neglected, especially after the birth of a child when the mother has to concentrate most of her energies upon the welfare of the child.

In my case, my wife and I have a beautiful baby daughter, who is now 16 1/2 weeks old at the time of writing. We have only had one attempt at sex since her birth (within the past week or so), although my wife felt a little uncomfortable physically, not mentally, so we stopped after about five minutes. Still, our relationship - our marriage - is based on many things, such as love, friendship and, above all, mutual trust and understanding. Sex plays only a very minor part in our married life nowadays, although this does not act as a barrier or as a bone to pick in any way. If and when we do have sex, we usually enjoy it very much, but we find that we enjoy our love for each other and for our little one even better.

Hence, although "Anita A" made a general point about men wanting sex and making it "the real life", I would say, albeit for myself only and no other man, that love is my real life, because I had always wanted a marriage based almost purely on love. Sex has always been by the way in our marriage and should always remain so.

"Anita A" is, in my opinion, only partly right when she says that sex without love is pure lust, because I am dubious about the idea that there must be "lust" between a working girl or boy and her or his client - they are certainly engaging in sex without love, but that kind of sex is purely to satisfy the primeval hormone-based urges in the body of the client - urges based, partly, I suspect, on the client feeling unfulfilled and/or neglected, as I mentioned earlier.
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I am glad to know a man of this world from Hubei said like this. So not every man is same. Before I also thought as same as Anita. Just 2 last weeks I've told my husband to break our marriage after he has left for work near about 4 months in his own country. We email often, send message everyday and call sometime. We miss each other but I thought he didn't want to come back to me and I felt married life is borring not free mind and I wanted to live alone. I decided to live without him and that day he called me. I talked with him with empty heart, he felt to my different voice, after that I told him that I didn't want married life any more. He cried very bad voice and long time till I was affraid somebody around his place heard his voice. He said he was running his life with my breathes. So I told him to stop crying and I would wait for him. That night we both were crying very lound noise together but in different countries. After this, he have called me every night till I told him to save money for calling me. In my life I have been told about man never has true love, it's still fixed in my mind and I can't believe easily that he live his life with love.
I am not sure about others, but for me sex does is like a cream topping on the chocolate cake. And it can take out stress from my Life. Do not compare which is more important Love or Sex, they both have their own place in Life.
Will you like to spend your life with out Love? No! and what about sex? No again.
Its like comparing Heart and Mind, need of being materialistic or spiritual, being sensitive and pragmatic. Nothing like that can be done away with, however, there can be time when Sex is needed and Love can not fulfill it and similarily there is time when Love is required and sex can not be a replacement.
If it is question of Love without sex or sex with out Love, then can anybody explain me what exactly Love is? Are we not looking Love from a narrow prospective , particaularily from a girlfriend or boyfriend prospective.
The question at the begining was revolving around marriage and so let us not deviate to the Topic of "Love with out sex" or the other way round.
They both are important but they both are not replacment for each other in married Life.

wait!! Am I confused my self???
No, I think I am pulling you all to the Topic again.
Bye need to have ...a bit of..............Emotion: smile
When I read the story of Our Man In Hubei, I could relate to a lot he said.

Sex is not THE important thing in marriage.

A marriage will last when there is mutual love and respect. Sex is only a part of it. Nice but certainly not the most important thing.
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