Would you be kind enough to correct my application letter please? I use this letter along with my C.V each time I apply for a job. So I want it well written and at a higher english standard. Could you be of some help. (English is not mother tongue)


The Letter:

Dear Mr/Madam,

I have almost 05 years experience in project planning and control, mostly in the Oil/Gas sector – upstream field facilities construction. This includes pluri-discipline projects (Electrical, Instrumentation, Mechanical, Piping, and Civil), both onshore and offshore. I was in charge of elaborating project schedules, progress measurement procedures and reporting, coordinating between planners and other multidisciplinary teams in different sites in matter related to planning and information sharing, informing and advising management about correctives actions and cost saving areas, coordinating in the invoicing procedures in line with the contractual documents to both, the client and subcontractors. My planning and control software knowledge include Primavera Project Planner and Primavera Enterprise Version, MS Project, Good experience in MS Excel (calculation and graphical presentation) and MS Office in general. My first degree was in operations research (applied mathematics) which covers also scheduling – a theoretical background of project planning and control software. Additionally, I recently graduated from XX in UK (Degree), specializing in finance. Other than English, my languages skills include fluency in X and Y languge.

Additionally, I have 01 year experience in teaching Applied Mathematics at a foundation degree levels, this includes Algorithmic programming, Operations Research, Statistics, Probability & Statistics, and Basic IT skills.

I value career enhancement (knowledge gained from the working environment, training... etc) more than a big salary package. I consider also teaching opportunities and I am open to discuss any job offer you may have. Please do e-mail or call me for further details.

Kind regards

End of teh letter

Thank you v.much. I do appreciate your comments and suggestions. Actually, When sending this letter to apply for project planning position I do not highlight my teaching experience; and it is not a direct copy paste of my C.V. but it summarizes, in someway, my experience/skills areas.

Also I do not want to exclude other positions in teaching and therefore I like to mention my experience in education. Obviousely, most of my experience was in project planning and this is detailed on carreer history section of my C.V.

I actually use the letter above when posting an advertissement online looking for employment and want it to fit for both project management and education job opportunities.

As English is my third language, I may tend to make some gramatical mistakes. So, please do hight any.

Many thanks...

Here are some general suggestions I make to my students about such letters.

Start by saying clearly what job you are applying for.

Where I live, people who read such letters do not want to have to start thinking 'Hmmm, what kind of job can I offer this guy?'

You need to say

'I am applying for a position as a senior mechanical engineer.'

'I am applying for a position as a junior chemical engineer.'

'I am applying for a position as a systems analyst.'

'I am applying for a position as a janitor.'

That way, the person who reads your letter can just send it to the relevant department or manager.

Never just send the same letter to different employers.

Each employer wants some different skills or experiences. Change your letter each time you apply, to stress that you have what you think that particular employer is looking for.

Do not repeat all the details from your CV.

Just focus on what seems important for that employer.

Always end by asking politely for an interview.

Best wishes, Clive
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.

Have you considered writing and posting two letters, ie one focused on getting a teaching job and another focused on getting a project planning job?

Have you considered focusing on telling prospective employers what you can do to help them, instead of what you have done in the past?

Where I live, prospective employers read these things while thinking 'Hmmm, I have lots of problems, how can this guy help me right now?'

Truthfully, I find it difficult to get interested in the grammar when the whole approach seems, if you'll forgive me for saying so, so wrong to me.

Best wishes, Clive