Forwarded message from "Dena Jo Kanner" (Email Removed)
( From: "Dena Jo Kanner" (Email Removed)
( Subject: OT, Friday humor
( Message-ID: (Email Removed)
( NNTP-Posting-Host: 24-119-104-29.cpe.cableone.net (24.119.104.29) ( Date: 2 Apr 2004
I received this in email today.
Gibson's Father Convinces Jews To Give Up World Control
By Dan Barash
March 25, 2004
Bowing to intense pressure from Mel Gibson's father, Jews announced today that they would no longer control the world. In a press release, Jews stated, "Although we have thoroughly enjoyed the challenges of world domination for the last 300 years, we feel it's time for gentiles to take control of their own affairs. We plan to spend more time with our families and pursue other interests."
Hutton Gibson stated he was pleased with the announcement, but expressed concern he was losing a scapegoat for all of his problems. He said he would be launching a search for a new minority group to demonize.
Many Jews expressed relief that they could give up burdensome responsibilities. Retired accountant Jerry Friedman, who controls all media in Montana, said, "I would just as well let the citizens of Montana manage their own TV and newspapers. Don't get me wrong, Montana is a fine state. But it gets awfully cold, and there's nowhere to get a good bagel."
Attorney Allen Franks said he's glad he no longer has to manage Bulgarian monetary policy. "It was getting to be quite a hassle," he said. "I already have a full time job and can't even balance my own checkbook, let alone control the finances of an entire nation."
Homemaker Judith Levine said she would "...miss the hustle and bustle of setting the international price for magnesium every day. But my son is about to be Bar Mitzvah'd, and oy! Such a party we're gonna have you wouldn't believe!"
Hollywood producer Sidney Greenbaum was pessimistic about the announcement. "Do you really think goyim know how to make movies?" he asked. "They'll all end up being high budget, technicolor snuff flicks if you leave things up to Mel and his kind."
Comedy experts expressed concern that the business would suffer if Jews suddenly withdrew. According to one insider, "Take away all the Jewish comics and writers, and all you have left is Carrot Top. That's not a world I want to live in."
A potluck dinner in honor of Jews' contributions to mankind will be held at the Hoboken Holiday Inn on April 3. All gentiles are welcome to attend. Participants will be encouraged to share an offensive Jewish joke.
Dena Jo
End of forwarded message from "Dena Jo Kanner" (Email Removed)
Jai Maharaj
http://www.mantra.com/jai
Om Shanti
Panchaang for 13 Chaitr 5105, Friday, April 2, 2004:
Shubhanu Nama Samvatsare Uttarayane Moksh Ritau
Meen Mase Shukl Pakshe Shukr Vasara Yuktayam
Poorvaphalguni Nakshatr Ganda Yog
Kaulav-Taitil Karan Trayodashi Yam Tithau
Hindu Holocaust Museum
http://www.mantra.com/holocaust
Hindu life, principles, spirituality and philosophy http://www.hindu.org
http://www.hindunet.org
The truth about Islam and Muslims
http://www.flex.com/~jai/satyamevajayate
o Not for commercial use. Solely to be fairly used for the educational purposes of research and open discussion. The contents of this post may not have been authored by, and do not necessarily represent the opinion of the poster. The contents are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works. o If you send private e-mail to me, it will likely not be read, considered or answered if it does not contain your full legal name, current e-mail and postal addresses, and live-voice telephone number. o Posted for information and discussion. Views expressed by others are not necessarily those of the poster.
( From: "Dena Jo Kanner" (Email Removed)
( Subject: OT, Friday humor
( Message-ID: (Email Removed)
( NNTP-Posting-Host: 24-119-104-29.cpe.cableone.net (24.119.104.29) ( Date: 2 Apr 2004
I received this in email today.
Gibson's Father Convinces Jews To Give Up World Control
By Dan Barash
March 25, 2004
Bowing to intense pressure from Mel Gibson's father, Jews announced today that they would no longer control the world. In a press release, Jews stated, "Although we have thoroughly enjoyed the challenges of world domination for the last 300 years, we feel it's time for gentiles to take control of their own affairs. We plan to spend more time with our families and pursue other interests."
Hutton Gibson stated he was pleased with the announcement, but expressed concern he was losing a scapegoat for all of his problems. He said he would be launching a search for a new minority group to demonize.
Many Jews expressed relief that they could give up burdensome responsibilities. Retired accountant Jerry Friedman, who controls all media in Montana, said, "I would just as well let the citizens of Montana manage their own TV and newspapers. Don't get me wrong, Montana is a fine state. But it gets awfully cold, and there's nowhere to get a good bagel."
Attorney Allen Franks said he's glad he no longer has to manage Bulgarian monetary policy. "It was getting to be quite a hassle," he said. "I already have a full time job and can't even balance my own checkbook, let alone control the finances of an entire nation."
Homemaker Judith Levine said she would "...miss the hustle and bustle of setting the international price for magnesium every day. But my son is about to be Bar Mitzvah'd, and oy! Such a party we're gonna have you wouldn't believe!"
Hollywood producer Sidney Greenbaum was pessimistic about the announcement. "Do you really think goyim know how to make movies?" he asked. "They'll all end up being high budget, technicolor snuff flicks if you leave things up to Mel and his kind."
Comedy experts expressed concern that the business would suffer if Jews suddenly withdrew. According to one insider, "Take away all the Jewish comics and writers, and all you have left is Carrot Top. That's not a world I want to live in."
A potluck dinner in honor of Jews' contributions to mankind will be held at the Hoboken Holiday Inn on April 3. All gentiles are welcome to attend. Participants will be encouraged to share an offensive Jewish joke.
Dena Jo
End of forwarded message from "Dena Jo Kanner" (Email Removed)
Jai Maharaj
http://www.mantra.com/jai
Om Shanti
Panchaang for 13 Chaitr 5105, Friday, April 2, 2004:
Shubhanu Nama Samvatsare Uttarayane Moksh Ritau
Meen Mase Shukl Pakshe Shukr Vasara Yuktayam
Poorvaphalguni Nakshatr Ganda Yog
Kaulav-Taitil Karan Trayodashi Yam Tithau
Hindu Holocaust Museum
http://www.mantra.com/holocaust
Hindu life, principles, spirituality and philosophy http://www.hindu.org
http://www.hindunet.org
The truth about Islam and Muslims
http://www.flex.com/~jai/satyamevajayate
o Not for commercial use. Solely to be fairly used for the educational purposes of research and open discussion. The contents of this post may not have been authored by, and do not necessarily represent the opinion of the poster. The contents are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works. o If you send private e-mail to me, it will likely not be read, considered or answered if it does not contain your full legal name, current e-mail and postal addresses, and live-voice telephone number. o Posted for information and discussion. Views expressed by others are not necessarily those of the poster.
(Yes, I'm top-posting, but that's because I'm writing an introduction)
The item below was posted by Dena Jo to another group, picked up there by the relentless Jay (Dr. Maharaj) Stephens, and cross-posted by him to several others, including AUE. (Feel free to trace the references.) Since much of AUE has him kill-filed, and since this seemed worth at least a glance, I decided to re-post it to AUE only, with all traces of J(DM)S trimmed and this comment added. I don't know the original source. I may be violating the author's copyright, but by now it's probably all over the Net.
End comment. Begin item:
The item below was posted by Dena Jo to another group, picked up there by the relentless Jay (Dr. Maharaj) Stephens, and cross-posted by him to several others, including AUE. (Feel free to trace the references.) Since much of AUE has him kill-filed, and since this seemed worth at least a glance, I decided to re-post it to AUE only, with all traces of J(DM)S trimmed and this comment added. I don't know the original source. I may be violating the author's copyright, but by now it's probably all over the Net.
End comment. Begin item:
(Yes, I'm top-posting, but that's because I'm writing an introduction) The item below was posted by Dena Jo to another ... know the original source. I may be violating the author's copyright, but by now it's probably all over the Net.
Jay is the only person I have killfiled, but killfiled he is. So I'm glad you picked this up and passed it along to us.
(Is that our Jerry Friedman who's mentioned in the joke? Nah, can't be. He's not in Montana... is he?)
Maria
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
>
Good God. Is there a bigger moron than Jai/Jay anywhere in cyberspace?
Dena Jo
Good God. Is there a bigger moron than Jai/Jay anywhere in cyberspace?
Dena Jo
Liebs:
Why feed Stevens' twisted ego, Bob?
I decided to re-post it to AUE only, with all traces of J(DM)S trimmed and this comment added. I don't know the original source. I may be violating the author's copyright, but by now it's probably all over the Net.
Why feed Stevens' twisted ego, Bob?
> Good God. Is there a bigger moron than Jai/Jay anywhere in cyberspace?
Yes. You.
Christopher
My e-mail address is not 'munged' in any way and is fully replyable!
Students: Are you brave enough to let our tutors analyse your pronunciation?
(Yes, I'm top-posting, but that's because I'm writing an introduction) The item below was posted by Dena Jo to another ... I may be violating the author's copyright, but by now it's probably all over the Net. End comment. Begin item:
It made me laugh. The line about Carrot Top was especially funny.
Thus spake Christopher Johnson:
A great topic of English usage, if ever I saw one.
Simon R. Hughes
Is there a bigger moron than Jai/Jay anywhere in cyberspace?
Yes. You.
A great topic of English usage, if ever I saw one.
Simon R. Hughes
Thus spake Christopher Johnson:
Yes. You.
A great topic of English usage, if ever I saw one.
A good example of the metaphoric usage of "bigger." If both DJ and I are morons, then clearly I am the larger moron in the literal sense. Yet it is still possible to designate her the "bigger moron."
But CJ should have kept a closer eye on his calendar. He posted his little insult on April 2, not the First.
Bob Lieblich
Moron of undetermined size
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