Hi.

Can someone please give me feedback on this extract of my essay? My apologies if it's a bit lengthy. :\

Thanks in advance.

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3. “Hamlet’s flaw is that he fails to act on instinct – he thinks too much.” Discuss.

In Shakespeare’s engrossing tragedy of Hamlet, the protagonist chiefly Hamlet, struggles to meet ends with his deceased father’s request to “revenge his foul and most unnatural murder.” Hamlet’s decision to proceed with his vengeance fluctuates, given the magnitude of dilemmas he encounters. As he moulds the schemes of his vengeance, Hamlet fails to act on instinct; it is his introspective and contemplative nature that obstructs him from delivering his desired revenge for his father.

Hamlet is merely a character; a character composed of quick sensibility, indecisiveness and thoughtfulness. As a rudimentary rule, Hamlet’s passion is to rely on deep thought and contemplation, but his inaction is the very essence of his failure to act on instinct. Through self-criticism and lack of initiative, Hamlet demonstrates that he defers his scheme of vengeance to participate in heavy and unnecessary thought caused by his conscience about himself: “Am I a coward?” This is his own self-response to his inability to avenge his father’s death: “No, not for a king, upon whose property and most dear life a damn’d defeat was made.” Hamlet’s innate impulses fail to propel him to act; his frame of mind toys with him and in turn, he criticizes himself for his discrepancy in his behaviour. It is on the basis of his meditative and denouncing behavior that demonstrates he is a man of thought, not a man of action – and more or less of a man of instinct.

Hamlet’s instinctive traits do not seem to be discerned distinctly throughout the course of the play. His constant mental bickering, that is, his soliloquy, over the refinement and perfection of revenge causes him to further delay avenging his father’s death. It is only when Claudius is in a divine state of praying that Hamlet is offered the opportunity of reprisal for his father. At this point, Hamlet appraises his current situation and instead of quickly avenging his father, withdraws. Hamlet articulates that such an act of reprisal would not satisfy or equate to the enormity of his father’s murder: “Why this is hire and salary, not revenge.” Despite the appropriate opportunity, Hamlet relieves himself of any immediate instinct and withdraws. This is the true epitome of Hamlet’s flaw – the partial inexistence of instinct and the desire to satisfy his father’s death to the extent that the revenge should not contain any “relish of salvation in’t”. It exemplifies Hamlet’s undermining weakness whereby he cannot execute his plan instinctively, but rather on the basis of resolving his conscience by equating it to his deprivation of his father. Ultimately, this describes the portion of Hamlet’s flaw in character, which cause him to falter in attaining his revenge.

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The following word or phrase excerpts need re-working:

the protagonist chiefly Hamlet
to meet ends with
given
Hamlet is merely
a rudimentary rule
his own self-response
his discrepancy
Hamlet relieves himself
the partial inexistence of instinct
to satisfy his father’s death

Your errors are mostly those of word choice, so use your dictionary to amend the indicated excerpts (further grammar work to adjacent parts of the text may also be necessary).
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AkiyoHi.

Can someone please give me feedback on this extract of my essay? My apologies if it's a bit lengthy. :\

Thanks in advance.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3. “Hamlet’s flaw is that he fails to act on instinct – he thinks too much.” Discuss.

In Shakespeare’s engrossing tragedy of Hamlet, the protagonist chiefly Hamlet, struggles to meet ends with his deceased father’s request to “revenge his foul and most unnatural murder.” Hamlet’s decision to proceed with his vengeance fluctuates, given the magnitude of dilemmas he encounters. As he moulds the schemes of his vengeance, Hamlet fails to act on instinct; it is his introspective and contemplative nature that obstructs him from delivering his desired revenge for his father.

Hamlet is merely a character; a character composed of quick sensibility, indecisiveness and thoughtfulness. As a rudimentary rule, Hamlet’s passion is to rely on deep thought and contemplation, but his inaction is the very essence of his failure to act on instinct. Through self-criticism and lack of initiative, Hamlet demonstrates that he defers his scheme of vengeance to participate in heavy and unnecessary thought caused by his conscience about himself: “Am I a coward?” This is his own self-response to his inability to avenge his father’s death: “No, not for a king, upon whose property and most dear life a damn’d defeat was made.” Hamlet’s innate impulses fail to propel him to act; his frame of mind toys with him and in turn, he criticizes himself for his discrepancy in his behaviour. It is on the basis of his meditative and denouncing behavior that demonstrates he is a man of thought, not a man of action – and more or less of a man of instinct.

Hamlet’s instinctive traits do not seem to be discerned distinctly throughout the course of the play. His constant mental bickering, that is, his soliloquy, over the refinement and perfection of revenge causes him to further delay avenging his father’s death. It is only when Claudius is in a divine state of praying that Hamlet is offered the opportunity of reprisal for his father. At this point, Hamlet appraises his current situation and instead of quickly avenging his father, withdraws. Hamlet articulates that such an act of reprisal would not satisfy or equate to the enormity of his father’s murder: “Why this is hire and salary, not revenge.” Despite the appropriate opportunity, Hamlet relieves himself of any immediate instinct and withdraws. This is the true epitome of Hamlet’s flaw – the partial inexistence of instinct and the desire to satisfy his father’s death to the extent that the revenge should not contain any “relish of salvation in’t”. It exemplifies Hamlet’s undermining weakness whereby he cannot execute his plan instinctively, but rather on the basis of resolving his conscience by equating it to his deprivation of his father. Ultimately, this describes the portion of Hamlet’s flaw in character, which cause him to falter in attaining his revenge.

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This is a well written essay, is there any chance you could paste the whole thing?