Hi, Good afternoon, everyone

I am a graduate student from . Last year, I submitted a research paper in English to a journal to publish, but it returned with objection because my English should be better. One reviewer suggested me to ask an English native person to rewrite it. So I ask an American colleague to polish my manuscript up and she has done it. Now, I want to send her a greeting card to express my gratitude. It goes as the following:

“ Dear Prof. someone,

Thanks for your extensive work on my manuscript! I am honored that you can help me and your work is really important to me. It is a pleasant experience to improve my ms together and I will cherish it for ever!

Merry Christmas and happy new year

Is it clear or appropriate? Could you help me improve the greetings? Thanks!
Welcome to the forum, Shu!

I personally would thank the teacher for "all the attention s/he gave to your manuscript" (or something like that), rather than for "all the work"! (Looks a bit as if the teacher wrote a large part of your manuscript Emotion: smile )
As a minor point, I would say "Thank you" or "My grateful thanks" rather than just "Thanks" - a little bit more formal and polite.
Teachers: We supply a list of EFL job vacancies
Thank you for the above both.
Students: Are you brave enough to let our tutors analyse your pronunciation?
I'd replace "you can help me"`by "that you helped me". And what exactly is your "ms"? Your paper? Emotion: smile