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"Dear Sir:

I am Brazilian and Lithuanian citizen who is applying to the master´s degree program in international business at *** University. My career ambition is to become a product manager in international strategic marketing.

I graduated with a bachelor's degree in international relations from AAA University in July 2003. I also completed three years of study in social sciences at University of B. By studying two different programs at two different universities, I learned excellent time management and organizational skills.

[After graduation,] I was a Marketing Co-ordinator in Public and International Affairs for a company in Brazil. However, I remained determined to have international experience. In February 2004 I moved to Aachen, Germany and I am now a trainee in the Strategic Marketing Department in a pharmaceutical company. [This is an excellent position because....
And then talk about how you need to complement your current experience with a better education.

I can picture myself as a product manager in 4 years time in the team which I work and I want to make a career in this corporation, nevertheless I have to gain experience. I see the Master in International Business at *** University with ist PBL system as one way to gain experience and further reach my goals." You can probably incorporate this information into your prior paragraph. I find your current "stuff" wordy, so try working the "content" into your prior paragraph in a sentence or two.

... I´m still working on the other paraghrafs

Do you think this information is necessary for the motivation letter?

I had spent three months in England in 2000 for an English course and in the following year I studied another three months in Germany. After completing my studies, I wanted to gain international working experience [No, you've covered most of it already.]

I have been working with Competitive Intelligence, I am closely monitoring four of our main competitors, I have written reports about them and their development in our markets and I also worked in the concept and in the implementation of a web-guide, where the competitive information is organised and available on-line. [Well, you have a choice here. You can either tag this information on to your 3rd paragraph. And then start a 4th paragraph with your future desires for a better education. OR, you can continue as above with your future direction appended to your 3rd paragraph.

That's the challenge. Without an outline, I don't really know how you have planned or mapped out your essay. If you have a well structured outline, then everything just falls into place. Now you are groping your way through the forest of darkness. But you're making progress. So you have some decisions to make on the fly.

If I were you, I would take your competitive intelligence information and append it to your third paragraph. But I would say how much I ENJOY doing the "international work". That would be a good introduction to a 4th paragraph where you talk about your desires to improve your education so that you can continue doing your international work, but at a higher level.
where can i find nadine's letter? thanks!

Teachers: We supply a list of EFL job vacancies
where can i find nadine's letter? i urgently need some examples for a good letter of motivation (for applying for an university!)

thanks in advance