The line graph illustrates the amount of different communication services were used by people from 1998 to 2008 in the world.

Overall, there was a sharp increase in people used cellular phone service. In contrast, the number of people who used mobile broadband and fixed broadband saw similarly trend.

In 1998, the figure of people used cellular phone service statred at over 10 inhabitants, and exceeded that of people used landline service at 20 inhabitants in 2002. This number rose significantly approximate 70 inhabitants in 2008. More over, there was a slight grow in people used internet service, and also capped in people used landline service at 20 inhabitants in 2006 whereas landline service used by people remained stable around at 20 inhabitants during 1998 and 2008.

At 0 inhabitants, the amount of people used mobile and fixed broadband in 2002. Howere, this amount saw an up ward trend, and was increasing at 8 inhabitants in 2008.

Here are my suggestions:

The line graph illustrates the amount of different communication services were used worldwide by people from 1998 to 2008 in the world.

Overall, there was a sharp increase in people's use d of cellular phone service. In contrast, the number of people who used mobile broadband and fixed broadband saw similarly trend a slow rise in usage. [You are contrasting (In contrast), so they cannot be the same (similar trend), they must be obviously different.]

[The chart is missing some information. Are we talking about the number of people? If so, what number? Thousands, millions? Or are we talking about the percentage of people using a service? You cannot write a good essay until you know which.]

In 1998, the figure [number/percent?] of people used using cellular phone service statred started at over 10 [inhabitants?], and began to exceeded that of people used using landline service at 20 inhabitants in 2002. This number rose significantly to approximately 70 [inhabitants?] in 2008. More over, there was a slight grow in people used internet service, and also capped in people used landline service at 20 inhabitants in 2006 [Confusing as written]. Whereas landline service used by people remained stable around at 20 inhabitants during 1998 and 2008, the [number/percent?] of people using internet service grew more slowly but exceeded landline usage after 2006.

Finally, almost no one was using At 0 inhabitants, the amount of people used mobile and fixed broadband in 2002. Howere, However, this amount usage saw an upward trend, and was increasing at had increased to 8 [inhabitants?] in by 2008.

Any questions?