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I want to know what i need to do in order to speak cleary, consisely and intelligently. I've learned that most of the time, i'm at a loss for words, coversationally speaking, and may come across as unintelligent because my wording just isn't there. It's embarrasing. And it's caused me from being a social person. I also find myself sabotaging relationships with people because of this speaking problem I have. What am I lacking? I mean, I would talk to anyone. Im not that shy. I read alot. I've studied grammar privately. I've taken classes on public speaking, grammar and critical thinking. I use vocabulary books and dictionaries everytime I need them. I've also read books on comprehension, critical thinking, reasoning and listening effectively and I still dont think I speak effectively. I can enunciate a word well and can even imitate public speaking figures or TV/Movie personalities quite well. I'm not delusional because i've recorded myself and i notice that i fumble alot or stop to think for a sec about the next word or the idea as a whole i'm trying to convey. It's as if I cannot make my words flow. I've noticed how people can just flow with words as if were born to speak. Like news anchors speak marvelously, I think. I would love to speak as a news anchor does. How do they do it, I wonder. It's all i think about, speaking clearly. What's wrong? Do i have a mental problem perhaps?
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Comments  (Page 4) 
I was just crying when going through all these posts. They are simply describing my problem. I'm a manager with a supermarket chain and have a Masters from Michigan Uni but my public speaking is just awful. I think it's because people looked down upon me when i was in school because of the way I look. I lost all my confidence then and I'm always tense when trying to exolain things verbally. I would try to follow some of the things advised here and hope I can improve as my confidence is now at it's lowest.
Hi,

Good luck!. Be brave.
You have already succeeded with other difficult things in your life. Most people can't earn a Master's.

Clive
Site Hint: Check out our list of pronunciation videos.
Hi!
I am a language coach and I come across a great number of people like you.
So take courage from this.here are some steps you might try:

1 If you are talking on the phone, it is easy; you may need to put down standard answers on paper. Practice saying them in as natural a manner as if you are speaking to someone. Speaking in front of a mirror helps.

2 Once you gain confidence, you can write down a few words and phrases and build small sentences around them.Speak them. Remember that the smart air hostesses and stewards you see on flights have standard answers; they are given just that limited quantum of language. Even their announcements are written down.How do you think boys and girls from rural areas or small towns are transformed into butterflies in a span of a few months? So gain courage from their fluency in speech.

3 Step 3 will be to try to remember the words you have newly acquired through your listening to the evening news in English(try BBC or CNN) and to apply them in a new context.
If you do make a mistake, use the magic word 'sorry' and carry on.

4 Speak slowly and enunciate your words; roll your 'R's and savour the sound of each word. The drawl will appear really good to the listener.

5 Do not , at any time, try to translate from your native language. It will interfere with your thinking in English and finding the right word.

6 At all times, keep your ears tuned for new words and telling phrases.

Do write and tell me if all this helps!
Best wishes

Shyam
AnonymousI was just crying when going through all these posts.
Me too! I laughed so hard I couldn't stop the tears! I could have written any of them. Speaking well is an incredible skill I'd like to have. I've always admired eloquent speakers. They have that ability to fluently feed their thoughts to me. My inability to do that frustrates me. I feel it has affected many of my relationships and is why I am where I am in my life. If I could just learn how to speak to someone else as if it were the most natural thing in the world, I would be very satisfied. It's good to know all of you are experienceing this as well.

This is what cracks me up - we all write well. We're fluent in our thoughts on paper but we can't speak! It wouldn't be so funny if it wasn't so frusterating.

Fo me, I've known about this for a while. When I was a kid it was real bad. My mother would ask me a question like, "What does sugar taste like?" and I would respond, "um sugar, sweet, white, like sand, ant's LOOOVE it!" Needless to say, they were very concerned. I was their special kid. So, they sent me to special classes when I was four years old and I remember not knowing why I was there. I didn't speak much. The teachers asked me to do simple things like "look at the jungle drawing and circle the bird with a red crayon." It was ridiculous but I did what I was told and didn't ask any questions. After two years, they let me go. I remember being so happy when my mom told me I didn't have to go to those special classes anymore. But, the problem wasn't solved. I still didn't know how to speak well and it continues to this day.

I can read aloud well. I don't have a problem with that. I actually really enjoy it. I like hearing the eloquence of my voice. I like hearing what I could sound like. I will try some of your recomendations and I hope it helps me.

Cheers
I am soo glad you posted this!

Initially, I thought my thought process, of speaking clearly, was due to my cultural back-round (Mexican). Then I thought, maybe because I am bi-lingual that I cannot enunciate words clearly. I later realized, what I may be doing is possibly creating excuses that are affecting me and also making me feel more and more self-concious about me speaking and/or expressing my thoughts clearly. I like to think I am very well educated although, i don't read as much as i should. It is comforting to know it a subject we all have difficulty with no matter the socio-ecnomic backround, culture, or education level.

As mentioned above, I hope this discussion influences other to speak.

Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
I'm glad I came across this thread because there are many others with the exact same problem as I do! I've had this problem ever since I was 12 for some reason and I'm almost 19. This speaking problem has been my primary focus to fix since then. It's been really frustrating as it has effected a lot of potential relationships. I haven't even had a girlfriend since the age of 12. I know I'm a cool guy, it's just no one sees that either because I don't talk or I appear stupid or shy with no self-esteem. I've gradually become so self-conscious to talk if there's no need to because I can't express myself clearly to people or come up with the words I have in the back of my mind. I just feel so pressured to express myself with confidence that I often get side-tracked and it comes across different as what I initially intended for the conversation. Other times when I'm in a conversation with someone I literally can't find anything to say back that I just freeze and say one-word answers or something really stupid! I'm still trying to get help for this because I know I'm not mental in any way because writing is a whole different story just like most of you guys. It just seems like a chain reaction where I eventually feel like I don't have a sense of direction because I don't have many friends and self-confidence and in return it will gradually effect my life if something doesn't change soon. It's just bringing in a lot of stress and depression as I'm trying to get my life together. I'm just wondering if this is a permanent disorder of mine or if it's reversible with a little self-correction and confidence. I won't give up until I find a solution to this whole dilemma. I personally live in fear of my future because this is a huge deal that could either make or break my life if I don't figure something out soon.

Thanks a lot guys for your insight because it has brought a little hope in my direction.
Cheers to all,
Alex
I feel exactly the same, im studying law and im not slow, im really not stupid but I make people think im stupid buy getting over excited when i speak but then the words don't come out correctly. I feel that I no longer want to chat to people or engage in conversation as im afraid of fumbling my words.I really thought I was alone in this and had a weird problem. I would really like to overcome this and move forward with my studies and even socially. If any of you know how to do this please contact me on Email Removed
Wow Im So Relieved I Managed to find a forum like this. Yeah alex mate you hit the nail on the head with that comment thats my whole life aswell. Its so frustrating I know im an intelligent guy but I can't seem to speak clearly or confidently. The consequences of not being able to speak clearly and out aloud are devastating. .it effects all my relationships eg family girlfriend friends. I cant seem to be able to connect with them the way I know I can and its so painfull. Everyone else aound me are 1st class speakers so its extra frustrating having to hear them speak with ease every day and im there just so quiet thinking why i cant do that.. its so lonely and depressing to have this problem, but I truly believe once we all learn how to speak properly we'll be the best speakers out there cus we know the struggle, so have faith..if anyone has any ways of speaking clearly and confidently could you reply back thankyou
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Hi I'm 12now maybe you can help me
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