Please review my essay and suggest some useful words or phrases for bar chart !!!. Thanks in advance

The bar chart below illustrates five different industries’ percentage share of Country B’s economy in 1995 and 2015 with a forecast for 2025.

Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.

The diagram depicts information regarding the proportions of which five distinguished industries accounted for the country’s B economy in 1995 and 2015 as well as a projection for 2025. Overall, it is clearly apparent that the financial industry has taken the lion’s share of the country’s economy with consistent rises, whilst others are foreseen to be on the decrease in 2025.

Starting at about 30 percent in 1995, the financial industry’s figures rose exponentially by approximately 15 percent after a decade. The figures are predicted to continue its growth and peak at nearly 43 percent in 2025. By contrast, the manufacturing industry’s statistics plummeted continuously over the time and are projected to keep that trend in the future. During 1995, the tourism industry’s percentage accounted for nearly 25 percent, nonetheless, its figures plunged by 5 percent and are foreseen to remain stable in the future.

Concerning the food processing industry and oil, coal and gas industry, these organizations have shared a similar trend from the past to the future. In 1995, both figures were about 10 percent and 20 percent correspondingly. After a decade, that of the processing industry doubled while the oil, coal and gas industry’s percentage increased slightly. Nevertheless, both figures are forecast to reverse to its starting level in 2025.

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Dear Hong Nhat Tan;

Where did you get this impossible bar chart? Do not write about graphs or charts that have impossibly bogus information. I refuse to review any such essays.

However, you can benefit from my advice on Task 1 essays. Choose a task 1 practice essay from a reputable website.

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post


To be honest, this diagram is my writing homework at my campus. so please review my essay. By the way, could you kindly recommend some words which fit this context, another verb form of bug :

Use the correct form of the word.

Before the meeting, security officers (bug) ..... the room which may have hidden listening or recording devices

she had a (panic) .... look after the crash
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
HongNhatTanBefore the meeting, security officers (bug) ..... the room which may have hidden listening or recording devices

This is the correct sentence.

Before the meeting, security officers checked the room which may have had hidden listening or recording devices.

The word "bug" does not fit that sentence. It would fit the following sentence:

Before the meeting, security officers bugged the room to install hidden listening and recording devices.

HongNhatTanshe had a (panic) .... look after the crash

She had a panicked look after the crash.

HongNhatTanTo be honest, this diagram is my writing homework at my campus.

Why do they give you flawed charts with bad data? Do you know what is wrong with it?


If you can figure out what is wrong, you will be an A+ student for understanding these kinds of charts and graphs. So please give me your answer.

I will highlight the text that is poor English. Your main problem is that you describe three data points, twenty and ten years apart, as if it was a continuous line graph. You cannot see what happened in between these specific years, so words like "continuous, exponential, and stable" are inappropriate. The other inappropriate word choices are described in my advice which I linked earlier.

Like I commented earlier, this chart has serious problems and should not be given to students. If you try to write a good "overall" paragraph such as I describe in my advice, you will immediately run into difficulties.



The diagram (What kind of diagram is this?) depicts information (That is not good. What is plotted on this bar chart?) regarding the proportions of which five distinguished (That is an opinion word. Do not write opinions in Task 1. Opinions are for Task 2.) industries accounted for the country’s B economy in 1995 and 2015 as well as a projection for 2025. (Your paragraph has a different main point, so you must start a new paragraph here.) Overall, it is clearly apparent (That is an opinion. Do not write opinions in Task 1. Opinions are for Task 2.) that the financial industry has taken the lion’s share (Do not use idioms in Task 1. This is a math/science exercise. Use scientific words and descriptions.) of the country’s economy with consistent rises, whilst others are foreseen to be on the decrease in 2025.

Starting at about 30 percent in 1995, the financial industry’s figures (wrong word) rose exponentially (wrong word. You can only see exponential, linear and logarithmic curves on a line graph. These words describe shapes of continuous curves, not episodic data points. ) by approximately 15 percent after a decade. The figures are predicted to continue its growth and peak (wrong word) at nearly 43 percent in 2025. By contrast, the manufacturing industry’s statistics plummeted (wrong word) continuously (wrong word - continuous describes lines, not bar charts.) over the time and are projected to keep that trend in the future. During 1995, the tourism industry’s percentage accounted for nearly 25 percent, nonetheless, its figures (wrong word) plunged (wrong word) by 5 percent and are foreseen to remain stable (wrong word) in the future.

Concerning the food processing industry and oil, coal and gas industry, these sectors organizations (wrong word - an organization is a particular company. ) have shared a similar trend from the past to the future. In 1995, both figures (wrong word) were about 10 percent and 20 percent correspondingly. After a decade, that of the processing industry doubled while the oil, coal and gas industry’s percentage increased slightly. Nevertheless, both figures (wrong word) are forecast to reverse revert to its (wrong word) starting level in 2025.

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Thanks for your comment, Does this bar chart contain false information?

HongNhatTanDoes this bar chart contain false information?

Of course it does. Anyone can easily tell that it is really fake, and I don't mean invented or made up. Charts with invented information can be very good for Task 1.

Use your critical thinking skills.

So tt's just an invented one, so what is the problem with it. ?

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